TTC after 35

Positive stories about taking a break from TTC?

Well, I started spotting today. Am drinking beer and eating chocolate turtles. Won't be trying again until March because my RE recommends I get the chicken pox vaccine, as it can be fatal in pregnancy. I'm feeling all the (yucky) feelings.

I'd love to hear, from those of you who have done so, how it's been helpful to have a break and how I can keep my brain from thinking about missed opportunity. Thanks.

Re: Positive stories about taking a break from TTC?

  • Sorry about the spotting, @Tomerine :(

    As far as taking a break, we had to take 2 months off this summer when my DH was dealing with some health issues. I won't say it was easy to banish thoughts of missed opportunities, but it was a weird sort of relief to just know that after 26-28 days AF would show up. It wasn't a disappointment. It wasn't a surprise. It saved me a lot of anxiety and emotional ups and downs. It wasn't a break I wanted to take--just like you--but, it did provide a bit of respite from the roller coaster. Also, I enjoyed caffeine and some beer! ;) the time went by quickly too.

    I hope this is at least a little bit encouraging for you. You are doing something that will be good for a future baby. And that's a good thing. It's still "progress" in a way--just not the BFP kind we all want. Hopefully it will be one step in your journey toward that BFP though.
  • Thank you @Sporty1216 . That does help. I hadn't thought about this as something I'd be doing for a future baby, but that does make sense. I'm trying to figure out what to focus my brain on- though I have a lot to choose from- and how to put myself in a good position for hopefully having a good iui experience in March.

    I appreciate your perspective and kind words. Thank you.
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  • I've had a couple breaks. One month after 3 IUIs, and then another month between IUI 7 and IVF. It really helps maintain sanity, and also helps me get a little exercise in, which feels good for my body.
    Me- 39 (turning 40 in April), TTC for the first time ever (since Jan 2015), low ovarian reserve
    Married 3/14/14 to my wonderful wife, but her sperm count is rather low
    TTC with frozen donor sperm and science

    7 IUIs, 7 BFNs.
    2 IVF attempts, both cancelled and converted to IUI, both BFNs.
    Decided that my tired old ovaries are ready to retire.
    Next step- reciprocal IVF, using my wife's eggs, my uterus!  
    fresh 5 day transfer (2 embryos) 4/17/17- BFP! 
    Identical twins "due" 1/2/17 (but anticipated arrival sometime December)

  • Thank you @KLake42 . I'm hoping to get better about exercise during this time.
  • Sorry that you are on a forced break, but others are right in that you are doing it for the absolute best for when you do become pregnant.  Really, March is right around the corner at this point!  

    I've had to take some months off for medical stuff, sometimes for me, sometimes it was DH.  Either way it did sort of take the pressure off, and the whole ups and downs and hyper vigilance on certain aspects was not missed at all.  Plus I got to enjoy lots of coffee whenever I felt like it.  That's one thing I just can't seem to fully give up.
    Me: 41
    Husband: 40
    TTC#1 since 9/2014
    Unexplained Infertility - Trying naturally
  • thistle8677thistle8677 member
    edited December 2015
    @tomerine My break was kind of half-assed, meaning I wasn't temping nor was I pushing it with my man, but I was still doing opk's.
    That was 3mo ago, and I can say that my approach is way more relaxed now. I think it was good I had to back off. I was getting way too stressed out about temps.

    I think a break can be a good thing if you can embrace the down time and nurture yourself. I don't know that I've been able to really do that for myself, but I did allow myself to chill.

    One of the ladies here encouraged me by saying that the time off will fly by, and it kind of did!
    I wish I could remember who said that...I'll look back.

    Hang in there and allow yourself to indulge in the quiet time. That's the best I've got! Xoxo
    Lilypie Pregnancy tickers
  • TomerineTomerine member
    edited December 2015
    Thank you @ jennh75b and @thistle8677 . I am starting to feel better about it and even looking forward to it a bit? I have a mental list going of all the things I can/will do: drink Diet Coke, have champagne for New Year's, have sex when I actually feel like it and know DH does too (amazing!), as well as focusing on getting my dissertation done (finally. I hope), exercising, etc. and I know it will go quickly. It just seems scary as I approach 40 to think of not trying every month. But I have to let that go because it's really just fear masquerading as control issues. Anyway, thanks for the support and advice ladies!
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