Weird things my grandmother says....

KLake42

So my Granny is usually as sharp as she's ever been, although she can be kind of mean.  She's not senile, just inappropriate.  My brother and I usually spend the holidays texting each other the weirdest, meanest things she says.  But this is just...

Ok.  She knows that I'm getting ready to try IVF.  As mean as she is, she approves of my marriage to my wife, and doesn't have issues with gay people.  But she didn't understand how IVF works, so she had to ask my mom.  And then, after the basic explanation, she asked...

"So, why can't they just, you know, when K and C make love, and the egg comes out, why can't they take that egg and use it?"

Blink.  Blink.

My mom then had to explain the birds and the bees, and lesbian sex (and seriously y'all, my mom is not the type of person who can generally be okay explaining lesbian sex, especially my lesbian sex, especially explaining it to her mother).  And that eggs don't come out during sex.

I hope you are all having a warm and happy holiday season, and that if you deal with any family awkwardness around TTC, that it can at least be funny.  And if it's not funny, then feel free to laugh at my own family weirdness. 

Any funny family weirdness that you'd like to share?

lickastick

Laughed out loud. Yup! Gotta love gma!

Tomerine

That is too funny- thank you for sharing!

I'm just happy to be with my family for Christmas because my sister-in-law was really over the top with her "when are you having another" comments at Thanksgiving.

rspalding001

OMG that's hilarious

BernieRae

Oh wow. Good stuff. Thanks for sharing!

happyktmom

I love it! Love the old peeps. They sure know how to keep it real

Noellee2005

Hahaha, I can totally relate! This makes me miss my grandmother, who passed away in June.

A few years ago, my wife and I were talking about our plans to one day have children. When we explained that my wife would be the one to carry, my grandmother looked relieved and said, "Good. V has more common sense!"

We all laughed, of course, but I was like, WTF? I think raising a child requires more than nine months of one Mom's common sense!

Itsnotyourturn

I totally know what you're talking about!
My great grandma said the craziest stuff and she wasn't crazy at all.  About once a month she would point at my face and say "My God, your face looks fat!"  
My face bloats right before my period.  I miss her so much.

Sporty1216

This is hilarious. And, I kinda wish she was right! Getting pregnant would be a lot easier if an egg was released whenever you had sex!

Sporty1216

**child mentioned**
This isn't TTC related, but it it "everybody's got an opinion" related. My LO rarely sleeps through the night at 20 months. We were discussing this and my FIL pipes up with "most babies sleep through the night at 6 months!" I just said "really." And let it drop. But come on. No one needs to hear how they must be doing it wrong. Especially on Christmas Eve.

On a cheerier note, happy happy, all!

lickastick

@Sporty1216 sorry about your FIL! Sometimes family just sucks as they push every one of our buttons.