trouble with spouse/partner — The Bump
August 2015 Moms

trouble with spouse/partner

is anyone else having issues getting along with their spouse/partner during this time? im currently trying to get our 4 month old on a routine so he will sleep better at night. what my husband does at night is different from what I do (I breastfeed, he gives bottle with BM) so I asked him to make a few changes to stimulate the baby less at night and he tells me I'm ridiculous and makes me seem like I'm this demanding crazy mom when I'm only trying to help our son sleep at night so we can all get sleep. it probably doesn't help that he works from home and now I'm at home with baby more and we are just around each other way too much. not sure what I'm looking for with this post. I guess just some support or maybe similar situations out there?

Re: trouble with spouse/partner

  • My partner works from home the majority of the time as well. We sleep in separate rooms so I have all the night time responsibilities as well as during the day. He takes him once a week on a saturday so I get one good nights sleep. I do find it difficult at times that I do all the work and yes he is working but he gets a break every evening from that and a good nights sleep. Sometimes it does cause friction as I still do not believe he does enough to help me out like if he has a break he could sterilise some bottle etc. My little one is also 4 months and still wakes 3 to 4 times at night so I am still sleep deprived which also doesnt help. Xxx
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  • my LO is also 4 months and still wakes up every couple hours during the night. We are both so sleep deprived and all we do is fight over sleep. I'm going to start some sleep training and try to wean my baby off the paci, since he wakes up and I have to put it back in his mouth like 10x a night. Sleeping baby at night = happy parents.


    People who have babies that sleep through the night don't know how lucky they are. Its really tough on a marriage to be so sleep deprived for this many weeks in a row...


    leannef88
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  • Agreed! Sleep deprivation is what's making us bicker constantly!
  • Sleep deprivation is the worst. But I want to say, it can change in a dime. Our son was up every hour bitching, eating, whatever. But as of December 1st he has slept thru the night. It was like an off switch, we did nothing different, it just happened. It can happen!
  • My hubby sucks, but after 3 kids i'm not surprised. We should alternate, but what does he do instead, he gets up when i get up with the baby and stays awake and watches me feed and change the baby instead of just sleeping and taking turns. He feels like he's doing his "part" because he's awake. I say he's an idiot. Alas, baby usually only wakes up about once a night now and its not totally killing me. On the upside, he's an early riser and will get up with baby at 6-630 on the weekends and take him downstairs and let me sleep in a couple of extra hours. 
  • @jadetree1080 how old is your boy? I feel like we are never going to sleep through the night. We have a few nights here and there where we have 3-4 hour stretches then it's weeks of up every 2 hours! I have spent most the day crying because I'm so beyond exhausted and defeated! I keep hoping it'll just click one night
  • He is 4 months. Born August 16th. It was seriously like a switch... Although I think giving him a nice long bath at night helps put him down. DH and I have been getting along so much better since he started sleeping, and it has allowed us to return to a semi-normal sex life. I hope your LO starts sleeping!
    heath3er
  • Having a baby has made me hate my husband and love him more than I ever thought possible. It is insane how quickly the tides change. 
    LoboandSuperNinja
  • Now that Lo is sleeping 10pm-8 or 7:30-4.. Husband is finally a priority.. I think bickering came because we both needed intimacy.

    Now intimacy is happening which wasn't great at first..

    Much better now.. Week 2!
  • ksimon23 said:
    @jadetree1080 how old is your boy? I feel like we are never going to sleep through the night. We have a few nights here and there where we have 3-4 hour stretches then it's weeks of up every 2 hours! I have spent most the day crying because I'm so beyond exhausted and defeated! I keep hoping it'll just click one night


    Same here! I would love for it to just happen one night but I'm worried that sleeping longer stretches wont just happen unless I do some major sleep training. I definitely wont do CIO and the gentle methods I am trying have not helped.




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