I'm an FTM, but I already know my fiancé won't be able to take any time off when the baby is born. He hasn't worked there long enough to qualify for time off. In fact, if baby comes during the day, he may not even be able to be there. It will depend on if his boss can cover for him.
That should be illegal, seriously. He should take a sick day. I would be furious if my husband wasn't there for the birth of my child. Any kind of decent boss should understand that....
His boss said he would try to cover for him, but at the moment only his boss and him even work there. All upper management (his boss's boss) are at a different location, and it costs them several hundred to get a replacement from a different location to fill in.
Several hundred? I'd pay it. Slash just let him come down with a really bad 24-hour bug or something..... haha
That was my first thought, I would be "sick" that day!
My husband will be taking off probably 3 weeks, then he will go back to work to finish out the last few weeks of school (he's a high school teacher). Then he will be home for the summer. I'm super excited to have all that time with the 3 of us together. I don't get tired of my husband being around, he helps out equally around the house, and I love being able to spend time with him. I don't really understand some ladies here that said they were ready for their husbands to go back to work?
I'm a FTM. My husband plans on taking a full 6 weeks off (paid leave). We're just trying to figure out if we should stagger/spread out his time or have it start and end the same time as mine. I definitely want to give DH time to bond with the baby and also establish some routines with both of us in the home at the same time. Plus, our parents will be dropping in for a week at a time to help out as needed.
I am a FTM but I kind of feel like between hormones out of whack and my normal "don't ask for help" attitude, anything more than 3-5 days is really just going to get on my nerves but I'm a bitch like that soo...
Eta: I'm 99% positive my SO is ok with not taking many days off and I am good with his decision.
I am a FTM but I kind of feel like between hormones out of whack and my normal "don't ask for help" attitude, anything more than 3-5 days is really just going to get on my nerves but I'm a bitch like that soo...
Eta: I'm 99% positive my SO is ok with not taking many days off and I am good with his decision.
DH really wants to take time off, since he couldn't the first time. With a toddler at home on top of a newborn, he knows I'm probably going to go insane alone, but that's what we can afford and what has to get done. If looking forward to when I go back to work PP and he takes his week off alone with the kids... At least he won't have to pump/breastfeed while watching them. He can get a tiny break that I wouldn't.
I'm a FTM, but I'll be SHOCKED if DH takes more than a day or two. He works in construction, and if the crews are running he has to be available... And it drives me crazy when he works from home, so I'll probably send his arse back to work quickly.
I want him to save vacation time for the week I return to work.. Would like a few buffer days before I have to deal with work and dropping minion at daycare.. Which I can already tell I won't handle well.
He took two weeks. He may have taken more, but he was using vaca time since his company didn't have paid paternity leave. I'm hoping this time to have at least a week, if not more, but he's starting a new job in Jan so I don't know what his time off sitch will be.
What about mommies taking time off before the baby is born? I have heard you are allowed 4 weeks off before the baby comes. I am having a scheduled csection, so I will be having the baby a week early. My doctor wrote me off 3 weeks before csection date. Even though I am having a planned csection, shouldn't I get 4 weeks off before that? My Dr said I get 4 weeks off before my actual due date. So I am technically only getting 3 weeks off before.
@Pinklet143 time off before still counts towards your total 12 weeks of protected leave under FMLA. I have no intentions of taking ANY time off before that will cut into time with baby after birth. You may want to consider that, whether or not you're willing/wanting to spend your time that way.
Yes, like PP said, you only have so many weeks off for FMLA, so I won't be taking time off before the baby comes. HR said I could take vacation days...but I would rather use those for when baby is here! I would probably just sit around and worry about why labor hasn't started if I'm home for 4 weeks before baby comes.
Thanks for the info. Maybe I was misinformed. With my last pregnancy I was written off so unexpectedly so I wasn't sure what is supposed to happen. So you get 12 weeks total?
In the US, yes, under FMLA. It can depend on your place of employment. I will be using sick leave for my maternity leave (so I can get paid). If I want additional time it would be unpaid. If you are under FMLA your job is protected, they don't have to pay you. You should talk to your HR department--they will be able to give you the most comprehensive information for your place of employment.
@Pinklet143 Oh you are in CA-- yeah, I don't know the specific laws for that state but we have a lot of friends/family that live there and they give paternity leave. Jealous!
@pinklet143 I think you're correct that California has a short-term disability scheme which provides some benefits for pregnancy. Your benefits really depend on your place of employment and employer (some companies offer benefits which are far more generous than the stingy requirements of the FMLA and/or some state law, others aren't subject to the FMLA and offer nothing). All of that being said, I've never heard of U.S. benefits aimed at providing four weeks off before a baby's due date. In my case (federal worker), I'm required to leave my job at 34 weeks because I am posted to a country with inadequate medical care, but until the baby is born I'm not even allowed to take any sick leave I have accumulated--just unpaid leave or any vacation I might have accrued. Good luck with your c-section.
I think I have an almost opposite situation than everyone else. DH has twice as much paid leave as I do. 12 weeks @ 100%, I have 6 weeks @ 60%. I don't plan on taking more time than that & DH plans to take his full alloted time. He will totally be Mr. Mom for a little while & he's so excited about it. This could all change when baby comes but it's the plan on paper for now.
Our situation will be quite different. DH does not currently work (waiting for residency permit and such) and I go back to school in February so DH will stay home with LO until June where I finish my exams. Then I'll have a 12 week vacation which will be my maternity leave. In Denmark you're allowed a 52 week maternity leave which I am not planning on using as I'd rather finish my degree quicker. I might change my mind when LO comes, but so far we will be living off the maternity grants I receive as a student in Denmark
I'm also not planning on taking any time before the baby - gotta save it all for after! Luckily my office is very flexible so I'm hoping that once I get about a week or two from my due date, they'll let me work from home until baby is born. My office isn't very close to our hospital and I would be nervous driving an hour away from home every day that close to d-day! @WBORDERS so jealous of the time off your DH has! I wish mine had ANY time off!! He ended up taking the new job and is in training all week... time will tell how flexible they are and if they'll allow him any time off when our little girl arrives. Fingers crossed!
Re: STMs - how much time did your SO take off?
Several hundred? I'd pay it. Slash just let him come down with a really bad 24-hour bug or something..... haha
That was my first thought, I would be "sick" that day!
I want him to save vacation time for the week I return to work.. Would like a few buffer days before I have to deal with work and dropping minion at daycare.. Which I can already tell I won't handle well.
Mommy to my sweet boy, JG, born May 15, 2014
Baby #2 due 4/26/16!
I am having a scheduled csection, so I will be having the baby a week early. My doctor wrote me off 3 weeks before csection date. Even though I am having a planned csection, shouldn't I get 4 weeks off before that? My Dr said I get 4 weeks off before my actual due date. So I am technically only getting 3 weeks off before.
With my last pregnancy I was written off so unexpectedly so I wasn't sure what is supposed to happen.
So you get 12 weeks total?