please help me

caraxxlou

Please help me ladies...nearly 4 week ago I gave birth to my lb. It was my first and it was a really traumatic birth. I tore due to fast labour and then had to have an episiotomy due to Sholder distosia this resulted in me having 2 hour of surgery and my lb being resuscitated 3 times. We ate at home and have been for 3 weeks. The first week he settled fine but now he won't settle after a feed I've tried everything. Nightlight, swaddling, white noise putting my partners top in with him. He just won't settle in the at night. In the day he's fine. It's causing me and my partner to argue because were always tired and he's back at work so I do all the night feeds. Sorry for the long essay I just really need help

ecwk

Sorry you're going through this. I don't really have any advice except to maybe post this in the parenting boards too because they might have good answers. Best of luck.

cmerribury

I went through the swapped sleep schedule with my son too. I know how hard it can be. I'm sorry you are dealing with this. For me the only thing that got me the rest I needed was nursing him in a comfy chair in his room and letting him settle/fall asleep in my arms (or on the breast) and then I'd put him down. We swaddled which helped, and placed him in the corner of the crib (with no bumper) so that he felt the crib on his top/side. It helped. If he fussed a bit I'd stay in the chair for a while (and slept there many nights). It took until 8 weeks for his sleep schedule to correct itself so that he'd sleep at night and be more wakeful in the days. Hang in there. It gets better.

groovylocks

Could it be gas? I know it sounds so cliche but I have always had indigestion. And it's horribly painful and often comes after eating. Especially at night. I don't know how to fix it in babies. I take vinegar but I don't recommend that for a newborn agreed with pp, parenting board might be more help

caraxxlou

Thanks girls I posted this morning and posted on the wrong 1 lol. I'm going to let him settle on me I think as that worked this morning. Xx

Bigboobsmcgee

caraxxlou said:

Thanks girls I posted this morning and posted on the wrong 1 lol. I'm going to let him settle on me I think as that worked this morning. Xx

OP this is very, very normal behavior for a newborn. Most new parents don't realize how hard it actually is and how rough it is on a relationship. Hang in there. It gets better.

delujm0

day/night confusion is very common in young babies.  it is also very common for babies to sleep a vast majority of the day and night for the first 2-3 weeks, waking only to eat, and then start to be awake for longer stretches around the 3-4 week mark.  So the combination of these things is probably causing your issues.

 

try to keep things bright during the day - for the first 6 weeks, we only had LO nap during the day in our living room, where i was set up with lights on and the TV on usually.  At night, she slept in her bassinet in our quiet, darkened bedroom.  By the time it was obvious that she had separated day from night (by 6 weeks, at night she would have one long stretch of sleep, 4-6 hours, before shorter ones returned), we had a whole host of other issues (she would only sleep on top of me until about 8-9 weeks, and she would fight naps unless we were in the quiet, darkened nursery).  It gets better.  The first 3 months are about survival.  Do whatever you have to to get yourself and your baby some sleep.  i can't tell you how many crying breakdowns i had when i was essentially chained to the gliding recliner in our nursery for up to 18 hours a day.  Eventuially i just accepted it and started crushing books on my Kindle while LO slept.  And then she started accepting the bassinet again around 9-10 weeks, thank god.

blended10

I totally agree with pp- the first 3 months your lo is still adjusting big time- as are you!
Try co-sleeping (either in a co-sleeper or safely bed sharing), hold your baby til he falls asleep, do whatever you need to do & try to rest, yourself, as much as possible.
I thought my hubby was useless for a long time after my son was born - I think it's a common theme! Chin up mama! You're doing great!!

PrimRoseMama

https://purplecrying.info/

PrimRoseMama

nickilynn0516

Try putting a shirt that you have worn recently so it has you smell on it down flat under him. Make sure his head is on it. Swaddle him too. He will be able to smell you and feel like you are holding him.