Does hubby mind a messy house if you are a stay at home mom

izv

With three kids and a newborn are there times when hubby complains about not having a perfectly clean house everyday? I agreed to have it as clean as possible on a daily basis. How did you handle that?

MouseMama817

I only have the one child so keeping our home clean and tidy is a fairly simple task. Time consuming, but simple. Hubby is still very understanding when he comes home to a semi-messy house. He knows better than to complain about rare occurrences. 

banfrog

The place being messy bugs me more than him. Sometimes I swear he's oblivious to it.

irohspupil

Same^
I'm more bothered by the mess than he is. Before LO got here, he would complain about how dirty the bathrooms were or how dusty the fans were, so I deep cleaned the house like once a week. Now though, he doesn't say anything about the mess; he understands I'm doing the best I can managing the house and our LO.

Tell your SO that he's welcome to help out with the household chores if your pace bothers him. You can only do so much with a newborn (and those other kids!). Have you ever left him alone with all of them for a few hours so he can see how hard it is to get things done with the kids?

missliz53

Yep, there's nothing like leaving your SO alone with the kids for a few hours, especially during a meal time, to drive the message home. My DH tried once to tell me that all I have to do is take care of the baby so I should have plenty of time to do other stuff as well. I leave him at home one evening a week so I can go to my dance class. The first night I came home at 9 at night, and he had the baby in one arm while attempting to shovel cereal into his mouth with the other. He never complained again!

ElleMF728

missliz53 said:

Yep, there's nothing like leaving your SO alone with the kids for a few hours, especially during a meal time, to drive the message home. My DH tried once to tell me that all I have to do is take care of the baby so I should have plenty of time to do other stuff as well. I leave him at home one evening a week so I can go to my dance class. The first night I came home at 9 at night, and he had the baby in one arm while attempting to shovel cereal into his mouth with the other. He never complained again!

This! I try to clean the house everyday but sometimes is just doesn't happen. DH never complains, he knows how hard it is to take care of the little ones, cook dinner and pick up.He has also witnessed my 2 year old destroy our playroom .5 seconds after I just picked the whole thing up.

mothernorth

SO has complained a few times, but then later apologized. If he has a rough day at work or is exhausted and not in the best of moods and the home isn't pristine, it's just another crack in a shattered day to him. But, he is at least mature enough to apologize later, and understand that it is hard with little ones running around to always have things perfect. We have busy, hard days, and our men probably do (or don't do) things that irritate us, but keep in mind that road goes both ways. They work hard too, and some of the things we do or don't do will irritate them as well. The key is communicating about it and being understanding and empathetic of one another's expectations, needs, etc. I may have gotten into this a bit too deeply or gotten off track, but this is the route my mind took with the topic.

tarheelgirl8

Hell no. DH knows better. If the house isn't clean enough for him....grab a sponge or a broom, buddy!

melanier26

I don't think my husband notices but he is a slob! I could be better about cleaning more often but it drives me nuts how he never cleans up after himself - he's like a big child! One of these days when I have the energy I'm going to bring it up with him because it's starting to drive me insane

jesselayne8

It bothers DH but he doesn't complain. He pitches in when he can. I do my best to stay on top of dishes and laundry but I let the rest go.

staciedw

I have 2 kids counting the baby. I leave everyday around 2 to pick up the older one and don't get home until around 7 from running her to all her activities. That is like a job in it's own and in addition I have a 3 month old to take care of. I'm lucky my husband doesn't care to much about the house. I think it bothers me more than him. Today all I did was vacuume and tidy up a little and he walked in and said "wow , it looks really clean in here" haha . I love how little it takes to impress him