Scared and unsupported

stillcozy

Hi so I've had more cramping today then normal nothing severe but I have had off and on brown spotting. I am really nervous because a few times when I have gotten up from sitting down I've had a quick sharp pain in the same area. I am so nervous please is this normal should I be worried? My DH is just "oh your fine " and goes back to his computer and is in a crabby mood feeling along and scared

EasterEggs

I'm sorry you're feeling this way. I understand being worried, but try to keep your mind off of it unless you start to get red bleeding. Maybe do something that will distract you for a bit. Chances are it's normal and will pass. 

didi0308

Lindsayleigh1989 said:

Hi so I've had more cramping today then normal nothing severe but I have had off and on brown spotting. I am really nervous because a few times when I have gotten up from sitting down I've had a quick sharp pain in the same area. I am so nervous please is this normal should I be worried? My DH is just "oh your fine " and goes back to his computer and is in a crabby mood feeling along and scared

Spotting and cramping are normal in early pregnancy. I know it can be scary. If you are concerned you can call your OB but they will most likely tell you unless it's bright red and severe be cramping you are ok.

stillcozy

Thanks it was the sharp pain that really threw me for a loop feeling stupid I posted this knowing others have posted similar ones it's just scary when it happens to you. I appreciate your kind words

dinodna3

Just try to remember cramping can be normal. I'm sorry your DH is not providing the support you need, give him a kick in to shape.

MamaBish

The sharp pain you feel when you move quickly is called Round Ligament Pain (rlp) and it is totally normal. Try to move slower

stillcozy

Thanks I had heard of RLP but never knew it caused the sharp pain that's helpful to know.

MamaBish

Rlp also shows up when you sneeze or cough sometimes, to prevent it, bring your knees and chest closer together. -pro tip

stillcozy

Oh good to know !

MRSCORKER

I'm with you! Im just a nervous wreck and since we're trying not to tell family, I feel like I have no where to turn. So grateful for this forum and to see others having the same symptoms/anxiety!
**creepy Internet stranger hugs**

stillcozy

I appreciate creep Internet stranger hugs please feel free to private message me if you want to share more symptoms we can all help support each other.

MRSCORKER

@Lindsayleigh1989 Thanks! I just wish I hadn't tested so early. I got my BFP the day AF was due and I can't shake the feeling that these cramps mean she's on her way. I guess because I've never been KU before so that is my only frame of reference.

stillcozy

Same try and relax and I will too.

stephweinstein

You can also get sharp pains like that from dehydration so drink up, girl.

pandamonium20

The sharp pain is perfectly normal, I get it every time I sneeze, cough, turn, bend, stand... Any fast movement in that area. From what I understand, spotting is nothing to be concerned about, on its own. You can even have certain issues that cause red blood and not be miscarriage. From what I understand, clotting is the line you're looking for.

I had red bleeding with a previous pregnancy at 7 weeks that went away on its own after a few hours. Went to the ER and everything was fine.

There is a phrase they repeat over and over here that I find comfort in. You are pregnant today. That is what matters. Try not to stress about what could happen.

PinkLady2015

We're prolly all a little on edge and over analyzing everything but try and stay calm and know that your body is growing a human!! You're going to experience some different sensations. Spotting/bleeding can affect 35% of pregnant moms (according to my OB) and unless you're soaking through a pad, it shouldn't be anything to worry about! I'm sure hubby is just trying to not freak out so that you're fears aren't intensified!

stillcozy

Thanks DH is an engineer think Big Bang Theory if you know that show and is a mixture of Sheldon and Leonard lol can be very sweet but too intelligent for his own good haha the other day he said " can't you just not throw up or feel sick, I don't think it's a good pattern to continue" as I was lying on the bathroom floor feeling like hell. Would have socked him if I had been able to stand but yes he "tries" in his own away. I appreciate the perspective though always good to look at it from his side. Also thanks for the facts they help too!

megstervt

Lindsayleigh1989 said:

Thanks DH is an engineer think Big Bang Theory if you know that show and is a mixture of Sheldon and Leonard lol can be very sweet but too intelligent for his own good haha the other day he said " can't you just not throw up or feel sick, I don't think it's a good pattern to continue" as I was lying on the bathroom floor feeling like hell. Would have socked him if I had been able to stand but yes he "tries" in his own away. I appreciate the perspective though always good to look at it from his side. Also thanks for the facts they help too!

*******qbf


I would be VERY unhappy if my DH was asking me if I could "just not".  I'd probably have some very choice words in the moment and we'd be having a long conversation when I was feeling better and more calm.  Maybe in a moment that you are feeling better, you could talk to you DH about the kind of support you need/don't need?  Tell him how it makes you feel (unsupported, scared, etc) and what you need.  Acknowledge it may be a stretch for him/his personality and that it will be ongoing, but you are going to need a different kind of support now than you did before.

KASG

Lindsayleigh1989 said:

Thanks DH is an engineer think Big Bang Theory if you know that show and is a mixture of Sheldon and Leonard lol can be very sweet but too intelligent for his own good haha the other day he said " can't you just not throw up or feel sick, I don't think it's a good pattern to continue" as I was lying on the bathroom floor feeling like hell. Would have socked him if I had been able to stand but yes he "tries" in his own away. I appreciate the perspective though always good to look at it from his side. Also thanks for the facts they help too!

Oh Dear God, SHELDON?! AND Leonard?! Hahahaha have fun with that! Personally, I like Raj the best

stillcozy

Haha yup I'm working on training him so to speak though

PrimRoseMama

Your husband is seriously lacking in empathy or compassion for you. Intelligent does not equal socially inept. In this instance, your husband is acting like a jerk.

PugsandKisses

PrimRoseMama said:

Your husband is seriously lacking in empathy or compassion for you. Intelligent does not equal socially inept. In this instance, your husband is acting like a jerk.

Same. My DH is an engineer, and while he does not get normal social etiquette, he is empathic to people's pain, illness and emotions.

He needs a come to Jesus talk stat.

CTmominGermany

I'm sorry you're feelung like you're going through this without much support. Once you're feeling calm, try to talk with your DH about what happened today. He needs to hear that he wasn't being supportive, and mathe some pointers about showing empathy. As for the cramps, I keep telling myself that it's a sign my body is at work, so things must be okay Big hugs!

acadia07

Try not to worry! Ditto the others; unless you get red bleeding, it's normal. Even that can be normal. The pain is likely ligament pain of its happening when you get up and down. Just a sign that things are starting to move around and stretch. Hang in there.

CosmoAnne1

I would kick my DH right in the balls if he said anything other than supportive things while I'm so sick. He is very intelligent,he does lack emotions and how to express him self but he knows how sick I get (and crazy bitchy) while pregnant. It's like I have a 6 month stomach flu.( I pray not that long this time) . Maybe the nex time your DH is hung over or sick you can say the same thing back to him? Good luck I hope you get some relief soon.
I also get the round ligament pain if I stand to fast.

stillcozy

Thanks everyone he isn't a total DBag all the time haha but I've realized he never really grew up with anyone being pregnant and this is our first so I think it will be good learning experience! Any good book recommendations for daddies or mommies to be?

jcar25

I've been having brown spotting as well, and have been feeling the same way. It's scary stuff, I keep expecting my period as I'm only 5 weeks!
We are in the majority honey, all good vibes and lots of excitement!

abushelandapeck

My hubby is a chemical engineer and a total scientist.  With our first pregnancy I was sooo sick.  He was so kind and empathetic, but got so worried why I was so sick.  A good thing for him was to just to read the nitty gritty of what was happening to my body and the baby's development during the first trimester, then the second, then the third. He needed scientific journals and that kind of straight forwardness....he just used the google thing for science journals. 

We're pregnant with baby #2 now and he says the other night "So no sexy time for a bit huh?  All that vascular stuff going on in there right?  Just give me the signal when I have the all clear!"  LOL I cracked up laughing!

BioTeach84

@Lindsayleigh1989 I bought my husband (who hates reading) Idiot's Guides Pregnancy for Dads. It basically gives him the nitty gritty of what I'm going through, what's causing it, and when he can do to help. He has actually enjoyed it and has been awesomely supportive so far.

thebigoaktree

My DH is a engineer as well, and if he told me to just stop being sick or whatever, his butt would be in the guest room. I've started to make him make my appointments so the doctors can talk to him about what's going on as well as me so he understands a little better why I feel the way I feel. I'm going to buy him "what to expect while your wife is expanding". Figured he could handle that one.