Mine are the same size? Does that mean I am having twins? Tit science would say so but I'm going to go pee on things and see what that says. I'm going to mix draino with baking soda to make an extra accurate gender prediction.
The result was an explosion of science and knowledge all over my hot pocket. It's going to be twins for sure.
So excited
Common knowledge here, but since you're eating a hot pocket, you're clearly craving salt, which means you're 100% having a boy.
Also, don't eat the draino/baking soda hotpocket. It won't taste right, and LO deserves hotpocket in all its flaky, salty, goodness!
I assumed "hot pocket" was slang for vagina. Surely I can't be the only one? Regardless, it's what I'm going to teach my daughter to call hers. That, or possibly "no-no square."
Somewhere along the way I picked up the affectionate term "dark down-unders." It's descriptive AND navigational.
I'm SO stealing this!
Ditto this. Also, if I have a girl can she still call it a hot pocket or does it have to be a taco for her heritage? She would have a hot-pocket-eating name. I want to be culturally sensitive, as her abuela will still chase her with chanclas. ADVISE DESPERATELY NEEDED because this is going to weigh on me all day...while I eat my pizza rolls.
Mine are the same size? Does that mean I am having twins? Tit science would say so but I'm going to go pee on things and see what that says. I'm going to mix draino with baking soda to make an extra accurate gender prediction.
The result was an explosion of science and knowledge all over my hot pocket. It's going to be twins for sure.
So excited
Common knowledge here, but since you're eating a hot pocket, you're clearly craving salt, which means you're 100% having a boy.
Also, don't eat the draino/baking soda hotpocket. It won't taste right, and LO deserves hotpocket in all its flaky, salty, goodness!
I assumed "hot pocket" was slang for vagina. Surely I can't be the only one? Regardless, it's what I'm going to teach my daughter to call hers. That, or possibly "no-no square."
Somewhere along the way I picked up the affectionate term "dark down-unders." It's descriptive AND navigational.
I'm SO stealing this!
Ditto this. Also, if I have a girl can she still call it a hot pocket or does it have to be a taco for her heritage? She would have a hot-pocket-eating name. I want to be culturally sensitive, as her abuela will still chase her with chanclas. ADVISE DESPERATELY NEEDED because this is going to weigh on me all day...while I eat my pizza rolls.
If you have a boy you must refer to it as his churro.
Mine are the same size? Does that mean I am having twins? Tit science would say so but I'm going to go pee on things and see what that says. I'm going to mix draino with baking soda to make an extra accurate gender prediction.
The result was an explosion of science and knowledge all over my hot pocket. It's going to be twins for sure.
So excited
Common knowledge here, but since you're eating a hot pocket, you're clearly craving salt, which means you're 100% having a boy.
Also, don't eat the draino/baking soda hotpocket. It won't taste right, and LO deserves hotpocket in all its flaky, salty, goodness!
I assumed "hot pocket" was slang for vagina. Surely I can't be the only one? Regardless, it's what I'm going to teach my daughter to call hers. That, or possibly "no-no square."
Somewhere along the way I picked up the affectionate term "dark down-unders." It's descriptive AND navigational.
I'm SO stealing this!
Ditto this. Also, if I have a girl can she still call it a hot pocket or does it have to be a taco for her heritage? She would have a hot-pocket-eating name. I want to be culturally sensitive, as her abuela will still chase her with chanclas. ADVISE DESPERATELY NEEDED because this is going to weigh on me all day...while I eat my pizza rolls.
Do they not make Mexican hot pocket flavors?! This seems like a gross oversight. If not, then I think she has to learn to use both terms in the appropriate settings. Codeswitching is an important skill, I think.
Mine are the same size? Does that mean I am having twins? Tit science would say so but I'm going to go pee on things and see what that says. I'm going to mix draino with baking soda to make an extra accurate gender prediction.
The result was an explosion of science and knowledge all over my hot pocket. It's going to be twins for sure.
So excited
Common knowledge here, but since you're eating a hot pocket, you're clearly craving salt, which means you're 100% having a boy.
Also, don't eat the draino/baking soda hotpocket. It won't taste right, and LO deserves hotpocket in all its flaky, salty, goodness!
I assumed "hot pocket" was slang for vagina. Surely I can't be the only one? Regardless, it's what I'm going to teach my daughter to call hers. That, or possibly "no-no square."
Somewhere along the way I picked up the affectionate term "dark down-unders." It's descriptive AND navigational.
I'm SO stealing this!
Ditto this. Also, if I have a girl can she still call it a hot pocket or does it have to be a taco for her heritage? She would have a hot-pocket-eating name. I want to be culturally sensitive, as her abuela will still chase her with chanclas. ADVISE DESPERATELY NEEDED because this is going to weigh on me all day...while I eat my pizza rolls.
Would it be utterly cochina to suggest that the use of "hot pocket" be situational?
As in, "is your taco a hot pocket right now?" It could be calor, or caliente, or even picante, depending on the circumstances...
Mine are the same size? Does that mean I am having twins? Tit science would say so but I'm going to go pee on things and see what that says. I'm going to mix draino with baking soda to make an extra accurate gender prediction.
The result was an explosion of science and knowledge all over my hot pocket. It's going to be twins for sure.
So excited
Common knowledge here, but since you're eating a hot pocket, you're clearly craving salt, which means you're 100% having a boy.
Also, don't eat the draino/baking soda hotpocket. It won't taste right, and LO deserves hotpocket in all its flaky, salty, goodness!
I assumed "hot pocket" was slang for vagina. Surely I can't be the only one? Regardless, it's what I'm going to teach my daughter to call hers. That, or possibly "no-no square."
Somewhere along the way I picked up the affectionate term "dark down-unders." It's descriptive AND navigational.
I'm SO stealing this!
Ditto this. Also, if I have a girl can she still call it a hot pocket or does it have to be a taco for her heritage? She would have a hot-pocket-eating name. I want to be culturally sensitive, as her abuela will still chase her with chanclas. ADVISE DESPERATELY NEEDED because this is going to weigh on me all day...while I eat my pizza rolls.
Would it be utterly cochina to suggest that the use of "hot pocket" be situational?
As in, "is your taco a hot pocket right now?" It could be calor, or caliente, or even picante, depending on the circumstances...
Speaking of pizza rolls, DH put the bag back in the freezer with 3 rolls left like a month ago. I have yet to think of an appropriately scathing punishment.
...And also, come to think of it, I've yet to come up with a grocery list and buy replacement rolls. It's not my fault, though. Every time I go to the grocery store I get as far as the free sushi samples, then I spend 20 minutes at the sushi case painstakingly narrowing my selection down to 2-3 rolls, and then rush home to gobble them up all by myself.
Speaking of pizza rolls, DH put the bag back in the freezer with 3 rolls left like a month ago. I have yet to think of an appropriately scathing punishment.
Divorce.
ETA because I accidentally hit post before I was done: I know it sounds extreme, but you need to consider the sort of behavior he'll be modeling for your future child. You wouldn't want your son to think it's okay to treat a woman that way, or your daughter to think she should have to take it.
Speaking of pizza rolls, DH put the bag back in the freezer with 3 rolls left like a month ago. I have yet to think of an appropriately scathing punishment.
Divorce.
Too easy. Hide the cord to his xbox, if he plays. Or cold water thrown on him in his shower...every day for a month. DH knows better than to eat my pizza rolls.
Speaking of pizza rolls, DH put the bag back in the freezer with 3 rolls left like a month ago. I have yet to think of an appropriately scathing punishment.
Divorce.
Too easy. Hide the cord to his xbox, if he plays. Or cold water thrown on him in his shower...every day for a month. DH knows better than to eat my pizza rolls.
I *MAY* be at least partially responsible for his indescretions, considering what happens when a pregnant me goes to the grocery store... It is entirely possible that there was very little else to eat in the house.
Then again... Who the eff leaves 3 pizza rolls in the bag?! Was he trying to send some kind of message, or making a lame passive-aggressive attempt to force me into some grocery shopping against my will?!!! He's the one who introduced me to the joys of sushi in the first place!! I was perfectly happy to call that ish bait for 39 years, dammit!!
... Lol, he's gonna wonder why he's in trouble when he gets home. Unless he brings me a crunchy roll.
I am blessed with a husband who would never dare eat my pizza rolls. Or my chocolate. Or chips. I, on the other hand, cannot guarantee anything, and it annoys him endlessly.
Speaking of pizza rolls, DH put the bag back in the freezer with 3 rolls left like a month ago. I have yet to think of an appropriately scathing punishment.
Divorce.
ETA because I accidentally hit post before I was done: I know it sounds extreme, but you need to consider the sort of behavior he'll be modeling for your future child. You wouldn't want your son to think it's okay to treat a woman that way, or your daughter to think she should have to take it.
That's exactly why I got my first divorce, just replace "ate my pizza rolls" with "treated me like dirt unless he wanted sex."
Wait, I think I may possibly be drifting even further off topic... Sorry.
@elasticheart13 - So you think. He just didn't want to give you any reason to drag your feet on the immigration paperwork. You married a smart one: by not eating your pizza rolls now, he'll get reunited with you and have lifelong access to your food that much sooner. Sneaky, sneaky hubby.
It's basically like when they hold in their worst farts until after they've already locked you into a relationship. Men are crafty like that.
@elasticheart13 - So you think. He just didn't want to give you any reason to drag your feet on the immigration paperwork. You married a smart one: by not eating your pizza rolls now, he'll get reunited with you and have lifelong access to your food that much sooner. Sneaky, sneaky hubby.
It's basically like when they hold in their worst farts until after they've already locked you into a relationship. Men are crafty like that.
Now that you're saying this. We were on the phone last week where I insisted I was right on something and told him I'd do the dishes for half a year if it turned out I was wrong. Guess what, I was wrong. Would I admit it? Of course not. So I did the usual thing I do when I'm wrong and tried to explain my way out of it by outsmarting him. Then he says "Babe, how stupid do you think I am? You know I always let you think that you've outsmarted me because it's funny to see you try to lie your way out of scenarios. You're doing the dishes." Dammit, he's smarter than me.
I love all this pizza roll talk. My husband doesn't ever eat my pizza rolls. He doesn't like them! I feel bad eating them too because they probably are bad for me
Speaking of pizza rolls, DH put the bag back in the freezer with 3 rolls left like a month ago. I have yet to think of an appropriately scathing punishment.
Divorce.
ETA because I accidentally hit post before I was done: I know it sounds extreme, but you need to consider the sort of behavior he'll be modeling for your future child. You wouldn't want your son to think it's okay to treat a woman that way, or your daughter to think she should have to take it.
That's exactly why I got my first divorce, just replace "ate my pizza rolls" with "treated me like dirt unless he wanted sex."
Wait, I think I may possibly be drifting even further off topic... Sorry.
I know those feels. Only my ex was also nice to me after he quit his job and I found out he cheated on me for the majority of our marriage...and continued to treat me like shit even though he was living off of me. I now prefer my dogs to be furry, even if they make my living room a mess.
@AmadorRose Ugh! I'm sorry you had to go through that... Thankfully you learned your hard lessons faster than I learned mine (it took me 18 years to leave).
@AmadorRose Ugh! I'm sorry you had to go through that... Thankfully you learned your hard lessons faster than I learned mine (it took me 18 years to leave).
I only learned because I joined the army, I wasn't such a boss ass bitch before.
Mine are the same size? Does that mean I am having twins? Tit science would say so but I'm going to go pee on things and see what that says. I'm going to mix draino with baking soda to make an extra accurate gender prediction.
The result was an explosion of science and knowledge all over my hot pocket. It's going to be twins for sure.
So excited
Common knowledge here, but since you're eating a hot pocket, you're clearly craving salt, which means you're 100% having a boy.
Also, don't eat the draino/baking soda hotpocket. It won't taste right, and LO deserves hotpocket in all its flaky, salty, goodness!
I assumed "hot pocket" was slang for vagina. Surely I can't be the only one? Regardless, it's what I'm going to teach my daughter to call hers. That, or possibly "no-no square."
Lol yes hot pocket was a vagina reference... Aka sausage wallet
Mine are the same size? Does that mean I am having twins? Tit science would say so but I'm going to go pee on things and see what that says. I'm going to mix draino with baking soda to make an extra accurate gender prediction.
The result was an explosion of science and knowledge all over my hot pocket. It's going to be twins for sure.
So excited
Common knowledge here, but since you're eating a hot pocket, you're clearly craving salt, which means you're 100% having a boy.
Also, don't eat the draino/baking soda hotpocket. It won't taste right, and LO deserves hotpocket in all its flaky, salty, goodness!
I assumed "hot pocket" was slang for vagina. Surely I can't be the only one? Regardless, it's what I'm going to teach my daughter to call hers. That, or possibly "no-no square."
Lol yes hot pocket was a vagina reference... Aka sausage wallet
Mine are the same size? Does that mean I am having twins? Tit science would say so but I'm going to go pee on things and see what that says. I'm going to mix draino with baking soda to make an extra accurate gender prediction.
The result was an explosion of science and knowledge all over my hot pocket. It's going to be twins for sure.
So excited
Common knowledge here, but since you're eating a hot pocket, you're clearly craving salt, which means you're 100% having a boy.
Also, don't eat the draino/baking soda hotpocket. It won't taste right, and LO deserves hotpocket in all its flaky, salty, goodness!
I assumed "hot pocket" was slang for vagina. Surely I can't be the only one? Regardless, it's what I'm going to teach my daughter to call hers. That, or possibly "no-no square."
Lol yes hot pocket was a vagina reference... Aka sausage wallet
Okay, you're amazing, and you totally have to be my best friend now. I called it, all you other bishes better back off!
Mine are the same size? Does that mean I am having twins? Tit science would say so but I'm going to go pee on things and see what that says. I'm going to mix draino with baking soda to make an extra accurate gender prediction.
The result was an explosion of science and knowledge all over my hot pocket. It's going to be twins for sure.
So excited
Common knowledge here, but since you're eating a hot pocket, you're clearly craving salt, which means you're 100% having a boy.
Also, don't eat the draino/baking soda hotpocket. It won't taste right, and LO deserves hotpocket in all its flaky, salty, goodness!
I assumed "hot pocket" was slang for vagina. Surely I can't be the only one? Regardless, it's what I'm going to teach my daughter to call hers. That, or possibly "no-no square."
Lol yes hot pocket was a vagina reference... Aka sausage wallet
Okay, you're amazing, and you totally have to be my best friend now. I called it, all you other bishes better back off!
Chinese Gender Predictor said my 16 month old son was going to be a girl. This time around it is trying to say boy. I'm voting it will be wrong again and this baby is a girl. We find out the sex on the 3rd.
It's basically like when they hold in their worst farts until after they've already locked you into a relationship. Men are crafty like that.
My DH will still get up and move to the other side of the room when he needs to fart. Seriously... Sweetest. Thing. Ever.
Even better, he claims I haven't broken the fart seal yet. Happy sigh. </p>
I farted first... Drunk.... at a Jack in the Box... While eating tacos. He knew he was getting one hell of a lady.
I love this story.
For the record, men aren't the only crafty ones. I got our officiant (one of our best friends) to work getting a Great Dane into our wedding vows. Muahahaha.
It's basically like when they hold in their worst farts until after they've already locked you into a relationship. Men are crafty like that.
My DH will still get up and move to the other side of the room when he needs to fart. Seriously... Sweetest. Thing. Ever.
Even better, he claims I haven't broken the fart seal yet. Happy sigh.
I farted first... Drunk.... at a Jack in the Box... While eating tacos. He knew he was getting one hell of a lady.
I love this story.
For the record, men aren't the only crafty ones. I got our officiant (one of our best friends) to work getting a Great Dane into our wedding vows. Muahahaha.
Mine are the same size? Does that mean I am having twins? Tit science would say so but I'm going to go pee on things and see what that says. I'm going to mix draino with baking soda to make an extra accurate gender prediction.
The result was an explosion of science and knowledge all over my hot pocket. It's going to be twins for sure.
So excited
Common knowledge here, but since you're eating a hot pocket, you're clearly craving salt, which means you're 100% having a boy.
Also, don't eat the draino/baking soda hotpocket. It won't taste right, and LO deserves hotpocket in all its flaky, salty, goodness!
I assumed "hot pocket" was slang for vagina. Surely I can't be the only one? Regardless, it's what I'm going to teach my daughter to call hers. That, or possibly "no-no square."
Somewhere along the way I picked up the affectionate term "dark down-unders." It's descriptive AND navigational.
I'm SO stealing this!
Ditto this. Also, if I have a girl can she still call it a hot pocket or does it have to be a taco for her heritage? She would have a hot-pocket-eating name. I want to be culturally sensitive, as her abuela will still chase her with chanclas. ADVISE DESPERATELY NEEDED because this is going to weigh on me all day...while I eat my pizza rolls.
Do they not make Mexican hot pocket flavors?! This seems like a gross oversight. If not, then I think she has to learn to use both terms in the appropriate settings. Codeswitching is an important skill, I think.
Judging by the cut off face of Spongebob in the other room I'm going to have to go with boy. Totally fate that he happened to be in the picture. It's a sign!
Mine are the same size? Does that mean I am having twins? Tit science would say so but I'm going to go pee on things and see what that says. I'm going to mix draino with baking soda to make an extra accurate gender prediction.
The result was an explosion of science and knowledge all over my hot pocket. It's going to be twins for sure.
So excited
Common knowledge here, but since you're eating a hot pocket, you're clearly craving salt, which means you're 100% having a boy.
Also, don't eat the draino/baking soda hotpocket. It won't taste right, and LO deserves hotpocket in all its flaky, salty, goodness!
I assumed "hot pocket" was slang for vagina. Surely I can't be the only one? Regardless, it's what I'm going to teach my daughter to call hers. That, or possibly "no-no square."
Lol yes hot pocket was a vagina reference... Aka sausage wallet
I know you're totally joking, but I just want to point out for anyone who doesn't know that it really is best to teach your kids anatomically correct names for their private parts It actually makes them less likely to be a target of a sexual predator.
Amanda
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Nov siggy challenge: animals eating Thanksgiving food
Mine are the same size? Does that mean I am having twins? Tit science would say so but I'm going to go pee on things and see what that says. I'm going to mix draino with baking soda to make an extra accurate gender prediction.
The result was an explosion of science and knowledge all over my hot pocket. It's going to be twins for sure.
So excited
Common knowledge here, but since you're eating a hot pocket, you're clearly craving salt, which means you're 100% having a boy.
Also, don't eat the draino/baking soda hotpocket. It won't taste right, and LO deserves hotpocket in all its flaky, salty, goodness!
I assumed "hot pocket" was slang for vagina. Surely I can't be the only one? Regardless, it's what I'm going to teach my daughter to call hers. That, or possibly "no-no square."
Lol yes hot pocket was a vagina reference... Aka sausage wallet
I know you're totally joking, but I just want to point out for anyone who doesn't know that it really is best to teach your kids anatomically correct names for their private parts It actually makes them less likely to be a target of a sexual predator.
Definitely joking, but you make a good point regardless. Don't worry, she'll be learning the correct technical terms from me, and encouraged to use them. If she chooses to use euphemisms when she gets older, either because she finds them humorous or titillating, I'm happy to supply her with a loooooooooong list of them, but she won't be doing it out of a sense that her body is too shameful to discuss
Re: Boy or Girl? New and Improved!
ETA: Please send pizza rolls to me.
As in, "is your taco a hot pocket right now?" It could be calor, or caliente, or even picante, depending on the circumstances...
How I should react - girls
How I did react - guy
...And also, come to think of it, I've yet to come up with a grocery list and buy replacement rolls. It's not my fault, though. Every time I go to the grocery store I get as far as the free sushi samples, then I spend 20 minutes at the sushi case painstakingly narrowing my selection down to 2-3 rolls, and then rush home to gobble them up all by myself.
ETA because I accidentally hit post before I was done: I know it sounds extreme, but you need to consider the sort of behavior he'll be modeling for your future child. You wouldn't want your son to think it's okay to treat a woman that way, or your daughter to think she should have to take it.
DH knows better than to eat my pizza rolls.
Then again... Who the eff leaves 3 pizza rolls in the bag?! Was he trying to send some kind of message, or making a lame passive-aggressive attempt to force me into some grocery shopping against my will?!!! He's the one who introduced me to the joys of sushi in the first place!! I was perfectly happy to call that ish bait for 39 years, dammit!!
... Lol, he's gonna wonder why he's in trouble when he gets home. Unless he brings me a crunchy roll.
Wait, I think I may possibly be drifting even further off topic... Sorry.
It's basically like when they hold in their worst farts until after they've already locked you into a relationship. Men are crafty like that.
Dammit, he's smarter than me.
Even better, he claims I haven't broken the fart seal yet. Happy sigh.
As for the rest... What a woman!
Edited (again) because I suck at code and it doesn't like me.
(I would have replied like an hour ago but I am really bad at finding suitable gifs. lol)
I love this story.
For the record, men aren't the only crafty ones. I got our officiant (one of our best friends) to work getting a Great Dane into our wedding vows. Muahahaha.
Omg your dress
P.s. Late to the party.
Edit: messed up my quote
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Nov siggy challenge: animals eating Thanksgiving food
Rhys - born 04.17.2013
Harry - born 04.18.2016