Anyone else kind of hate their Dr?

alwaysabridesmaid1

I had a Gyn who I loved before I got pregnant..  However, when I got pregnant I found out that she doesn't do OB, just gyn.  I've started going to an affiliated practice (one that delivers at the hospital I want to be at)-- I liked the first doc I saw there, but the second one (who I saw this morning) I really hated!  She made me feel bad about having gained 1 lb so far (ie- that I shouldn't have gained anything... btw, I'm 11 wks and starting at a normal weight, and I've already gone up a bra/cup size, so I know where basically all that weight has gone!).  She also told me she wouldn't give me the Harmony test (I'm nearly 33) which would be fine, except that the whole reason my husband and I were considering it was that the doc I saw at my first appt a few weeks ago told us to think about doing it! It just seems like we're getting different info from different people and it's frustrating!  

Am I just being overly sensitive?  I'm going to be SUPER unhappy if she ends up being on call when I deliver, but it's a relatively large practice, so I don't know what the chances of that are. Anyone else dealing with a practice where you like some docs and really don't like others? Anyone thinking of switching practices already?

DeePaddy24

First, in response to the title of your thread: 

YES! I absolutely hate my doctor. I am currently in the process of trying to figure something else out for myself, because I'm not putting up with her for the duration of my pregnancy. I believe we should feel 100% comfortable with our Dr's, especially while pregnant...& I want someone to advocate for me & my LO. I'm extremely unhappy with my current situation, so I do understand where you're coming from. 

Since you mentioned it's a relatively large practice, is there anyway you can talk to someone about not seeing that Dr anymore? Express your concerns...I'd hope they'd hear you out & do everything in their power to ensure you're happy & remain with them. 

Good luck. It's not fun! 

feenstas

She made you feel bad about gaining 1 lb? Seriously, maybe you had to poop for goodness sake. Normal (not pregnant) people fluctuate 3-5 lbs on any given day lol. 

But yeah. I hated mine. We had group appointments with 5-6 other couples and she kept mentioning stillbirths. She also said we weren't allowed to go to haunted houses and listed about 20 other ridiculous rules. But I switched. I see my new OB in 6 days. She'll be a little more costly but that's no big deal. 

catherinekate

I also have to leave my current doctor (who I like) and I am worried that I will similarly hate my new doctor, although I'm trying to be optimistic. Your new doctor sounds horrendous. And 1 pound weight gain -- weight fluctuates slightly all day, so you quite likely haven't gained anything at all. When you book your next appointment, can you request to see the first doctor again?

Lyette1206

I hate my family dr. Luckily at 10 weeks I start seeing my midwife (who I used during my first pregnancy and liked). My family dr says stupid things like "well, I would advise against a midwife since you had a c-section the first time. I think we should go ahead a schedule a second". Even though the dr who performed my c section said I was fine to try a vaginal birth. He then said "well, most women end up just having a second c section after a failed labor". This may be true, but way to be supportive!!

alwaysabridesmaid1

I'm so glad to hear that others are in the same boat!  I feel a bit better knowing that there are even less thoughtful docs out there-- @feenstas, I think I would just constantly cry if my doc talked about stillbirths all the time. 

@DeePaddy24 -- yes, I'm going to make sure I don't book any appointments with her in the future.  I'm seeing a 3rd (new!) doc for my next appt at about 15 wks (the first doc didn't have any availability that week)... I really wish I could just see one person the whole time, and, most importantly, I wish I knew who was going to be there at delivery.  I'm a FTM, so I'm assuming it's going to be pretty overwhelming in the first place-- the last thing I want is a doc I don't like/trust in the room! 

Bear14+

I'm in a practice with about 6 doctors. I will start rotating in the 2nd tri to see them all. There is one that I dislike for similiar reasons...I was so tiny & she was giving me a hard time about weight gain, etc. I was praying she wouldn't be on call when I went into labor. Fortunately, she wasn't. But honestly, if she is this time, I really won't care. The OBGYN that was on call, played such a small part of my labor & delivery. I saw her for maybe 30 minutes of almost 30 hours of labor.

Knottie86418473

I had a group appt that was sort of a cluster so changed groups before even seeing the doctor. This was also due to the fact that, even though I called them when I was 5 weeks pregnant, they couldn't get me in to the doctor until mid-late December, when I'd be going into my second trimester already! Plus I'd then be past the time to get the genetic screening (that they said we should get as I'm 'high-risk' at 37). Just didn't seem like they had their stuff together. I called another provider (thank goodness for PPO!) and they were able to get me in with one of their doctors in a week and a half. Keeping fingers crossed I'll like her, but if not, I'll try another in the practice. And the lady who got on you for gaining a pound can stuff it! Pre-pregnancy I fluctuate about 3 pounds pretty consistently. Like someone else said - maybe you just had to poo! lol And if you start at a normal weight, gaining 3-5 through first trimester is totally acceptable anyway.

totsabounding

Dump that doctor, you deserve one that you like!

FutureMrsCAF

With DD, I went to a practice with 3 OBs and I only liked one of them. In hindsight, I wish I would've run far away from them. I started with a different OB this time, and have since switched to a midwife bc I didn't like the way she handled my care. If you are not happy, feel free to leave. Ultimately, it's a business, and you wouldn't return to a grocery store, dry cleaner, restaurant, etc you didn't like. We still have a long time till these babes get here, so there's plenty of time to find the right fit. Good luck!

Rawa1416

The practice I went to for my first had issues communicating with each other and I ended up with the dr I liked least delivering. I suggest finding a new practice if they're already having a hard time communicating.

MynaBird

Ditto so much of what has been said above. You always want to have positive, trusting relationships with your health care providers, and that's especially true when you're talking about an experience that's as all-consuming and life-changing as pregnancy. I switched after 1st tri from a high-end, high-demand practice where I felt like just another customer to a small provider where the OB, midwife and nurses, even the girl at the front desk, knew me and cared about my experience. Best decision ever. (Benefit of seeing a female GP I know & love who has small kids: She recommended the OB she had used, knowing he would be a good fit for me.)

Lyzza350

Do not see a doctor you hate. I had the same experience last pregnancy and I left the practice. I ended up being thrilled with that decision! Or if it's a large practice I'd request not to see her. And call the main doctor and request she not deliver you. If you ask they may do that for you.

jennk0118

The jury is still out on mine.. I used to go to the best, but she moved to Florida.... so I had to go to a different one. There weren't anymore females except midwives, but I'm hoping for a VBAC and prefer a OB. He seems nice right now.. and I have heard a lot of good things about him.. so finger crossed. 

However; you don't deserve to go to a doctor you don't like. 

TwoBadMice

I would talk to the doctor you don't like about your concerns. But don't wait too long I had a bad feeling about my first doctor with my first pregnancy and ended up switching at 32 week. Some practices won't take you if your too far along and I barly made the cut off! I agree with other PP that it is a business so don't feel bad about leaving! I'm trying a new practice with this pregnancy because I didn't like how the practice that delivered my first LO handlers my MC. It's hard to find a good doctor you like!!! GL

june2016baby

Wow, about the weight thing! I'm a little overweight and was scared my doctor might mention it. So I purposefully beat him to it by saying, "Sorry I'm a little overweight. I know that it's not good to get pregnant while overweight." My doctor just laughed and said good-naturedly, "Well don't worry about it now! You're pregnant!" He even said to gain the regular 25 to 35 since I wasn't that overweight. I was very relieved he was so nice about it.

And about the test. That is completely in acceptable! I wouldn't schedule an appoint with her again. I might even talk about it at my next appointment, to let another doctor know what happened. Doctors within a practice need to be more on the same page.

If there's a whole lot of doctors at the practice, with any luck you might never have to see her again. Good- luck on whatever you decide.

GinnyJ2012

I would change practices. There is no guarantee she won't be the OB on call when you go into labor. It is true you don't see the delivery OB that long, but you want to trust them to take the best care of you especially if something goes wrong.