He left

erinlee+1

Hi
I am 13 weeks and 5 days pregnant with my 3rd child to a different father to my other two.. This pregnancy was planned by the both of us.. I found out he cheated on me, I thought we could make it work but the girl kept contacting which made it hard.. We had a huge fight and he left.. Where do I go from here and what do I do? I've been a mess for 5 days now and really can't cope

kalanieileen

If this is not MUD I am very sorry to hear what you are going through right now. Being cheated on by someone you love is very painful. Do you have a close friend or family member you can confide in or talk to?
Remember to take care of yourself and your little ones.

Your post is a bit vague on a few points for me. Was the other woman just contacting him or did he continue to mess around with her after you found out he cheated?

You need to figure out what's best for you and your children.

Bigboobsmcgee

I would try to find family or friends to talk to and lean on.

kyraaD

well, for starters i would NOT go back to him. he's a cheater. he doesn't love or respect you the way you deserve. & the fact that the girl who he cheated with is still able to contact him is ridiculous. he clearly doesn't have any interest in cutting her out of his life & trying to patch things up with you.

it's only been 5 days. carrying his child is probably going to make moving on even harder than a normal breakup would, but if he walked away then dont chase him. surround yourself with friends & family. keep yourself busy.

SarahFoley725

I'm sorry this is horrible. I would try to focus on the gift that he helped give you, which is the baby. Try to let the good outweigh the bad. I imagine carrying the child of someone who hurt you would be very difficult and you may possibly have times where you resent the baby, but remember that you wanted this child and it will love you no matter what.

There are SO many women who raise babies on their own. It won't be easy but it will be a hell of a lot better than going back to some sleeze ball.

NellyRoche

Hey Hun, I know what you are going through.. my man left me the day after I found out I was pregnant. It took me three months to get over him. It was hard, I won't lie. But you need to make the best out of your situation! If you have a family?- spend time with them! Cuddle your children now and try and get out. Yes it's okay to lock yourself away in the bathroom and cry for hours.. I did that too! But once you are over him, you'll see the light at the end and be happy. I am 4 months and 2 weeks pregnant and going to be alone. The father doesn't want to know anything about his child, even if it dies (his words).
Plan your future and how you will survive with a new born and your othee children. That's a good distraction.

Best of luck x

ZoeyRaeJames

The best advice I can give you, is to first find friends and/or family members you TRUST, that you can lean on. Especially those that will lend a listening ear! Second, try your best to find a way to help yourself and you children! Third, do NOT go back to the cheese bag(I'm trying to be nice on that one), because he will just continue to cheat and lie.

Find a way to make your children and you happy FIRST. Focus on that. And like many of us have said - Get with friends and family that will for sure be there for you, that you fully trust. I know it's hard to move on (I've dealt with cheaters in my past), so how well I know! Luckily, we didn't have any children. It was just us. But this is all the BEST I can give you!

Stay strong, and best of luck to you! You can do it, Mama!

kalanieileen

I'm assuming this is MUD. You click on the username and it says user not found.

ambercakes92

kalanieileen said:

I'm assuming this is MUD. You click on the username and it says user not found.

I think this can happen when a name has an unusual character.

lilnutfd

I think you need to figure out what's best for you and your children by speaking to loved ones and get counseling. They will help you in finding ways to help you cope during this terrible time. Since I am not in your shoes I will not tell you to leave or stay. That's completely up to you. Just remember just because you don't know what you want right now whether to stay or leave that it's OK. It's OK that the answer might not come to you right now. If you two do decide to work on it. Then I would highly recommend getting couples counseling. I've seen many people deal with infidelity in there own ways. Some have left others have stayed and dealt with it with help. Being cheated on is the most hurtful thing that one can go through. I know that's a complete understatement. Just remember you didn't do anything to deserve this and you don't control anything that happens in life. That goes for we don't control our partners action. Just don't lose sight of what's important. Your health and your children. I hope and pray for all the best. Xoxo.... it may not seem like it At the moment but everything will be OK

kalanieileen

ambercakes92 said:

kalanieileen said:

I'm assuming this is MUD. You click on the username and it says user not found.

I think this can happen when a name has an unusual character.

I never knew! Good to know, I retract my earlier comment. hopefully it all works out for her.

DebraG421

So sorry.... cheaters are the scum of the earth! Are you married?  You have a lot more rights if you are.  I was a bit jaded before I got married and made my guy jump through quite a few hoops to prove dedication because I tend to think that most guys are irresponsible.  And you know what, leave then!  I did not plan a life with a man and I believe I got a good one!  He's stuck with me already through two bouts of depression. I know in the modern world that a lot of people consider marriage as an afterthought and it's not really important, but I am a firm believer in pre-marriage counseling and saying those vows out loud before God... even if it does end in divorce or the same kind of thing happens.  You are never truly safe or guaranteed anything. However, he will still have to help care for the child he made.  I'm so sorry this happened.  Be strong for your children. You WILL get through somehow and when you allow yourself to date again, don't settle! Be more firm in defining what you want and expect.  There are never guarantees, but don't be afraid to be demanding of men and you may just get it!

soxfan9968

Won't someone please think of the kittens!! 

TheRealHeatherG

What is MUD?

kyraaD

TheRealHeatherG said:

What is MUD?

Made Up Drama = MUD