Intro and question

NamelessAria

Hey everyone,

I'm not 100% sure what to say for an intro so I'll just say what comes to mind. I guess I'll preface this by saying that DH and I aren't quite ready to try again yet. We'll have to at least wait till my hCG levels go back to 0 which could take a bit. I wanted to go ahead and introduce myself though and ask a couple of questions.

DH and I decided during the holidays last year that we wanted to try for a baby. We had the "let's try" talk when we got back home from traveling to visit our families. We "tried" (not very actively I suppose; more like not protecting) from January- August. In August I told DH it was taking a really long time and I'd decided it would probably be a good idea to start trying more actively. DH said we probably didn't really need to bother with all that but he wanted me to do whatever made me happy. So I ordered a basal body thermometer, 100 OPKs and paid for a subscription to Fertility Friend. In September I lost my grandpa, which was heartbreaking. DH and I had a moment of realization that the longer it takes us to have a LO the more likely we are to not have people who are important to us still around to share in our joy. DH only has 1 grandparent left (his grandmother) and she's 88. Suddenly, DH was glad I'd started temping, charting and all that nonsense to hopefully increase our odds in TTC. October 16th we were rewarded with our first BFP. I was absolutely over the moon and DH was cautiously optimistic. Around week 5 DH started to finally start feeling like it was "real" and started designing a crib (DH is big into woodworking) and planning how we're going to decorate the nursery.

Thursday (Nov 5th) at 6 weeks I started cramping and spotting. By Friday night it looked like the beginning of a period and the cramping was worse. This morning (Saturday the 7th) I started having severe cramping (too painful to even sit in a chair) and more bleeding until I passed globs of tissue. I'm going to call my doctor on Monday and see if she wants to do any blood work or anything to make sure I passed everything. DH and I are absolutely heartbroken. We talked about it before and agreed that if something went wrong and I miscarried that we'd try again as soon as I felt ready. From what I've read once hCG levels go back to 0 you can start TTC again so we'll probably do that.

**Question**
So here's my question: How do I chart after a loss? I saw Fertility Friend has a box you can check for miscarriage and it looks like it started a new cycle for me. Do I just chart like the MC was a period? Should I wait till I have an actual period to start my first "real" chart after the loss and just toss the charting in-between the MC and my first period? I've honestly never looked into all this because.... I was hoping I'd never need to know I suppose. Even if it takes us a couple of weeks/months/whatever to be ready to actively TTC again I want to at least go ahead and get back into a habit of charting.

PeggyOlsonFTW

I am so so sorry for your loss. I didn't start temping right after my d&c, I started on CD 21 and just used the dates I bled from my d&c as my menstruation dates. I mostly did it because I wanted to get back into the habit and see if I actually was going to ovulate, which I did.

Also, my OB never checked my hCG levels, she just told me to wait one cycle before trying again.

Bsks2002

Hi there- so sorry for your loss. I chart also and I considered the first day I bled of my mc as day one of a new cycle. I started temping right away to watch for my temp to go back down. Whether you decide to try again right away or wait at least you will know what your cycle is doing.

AL_TwinCities

I'm so sorry for your loss! I didn't start temping until several cycles after my loss so I don't have any advice there for you. My loss was a day shy of 6 weeks and my Dr also told me to wait one cycle before TTC again. She did say that the miscarriage bleeding could count as my period/CD1

NamelessAria

First I wanted to thank everyone for the replies and I also wanted to say that I'm very sorry you all have reason to be here also.

I was thinking I'd probably just use the days I bled at the days of my menstrual period but I wanted to make sure that made sense to other people. Thanks. I just charted it that way. I'm assuming this transitional period between now and my first actual menstrual period will probably be pretty wonky with temps and such so I may end up excluding this chart from my cycle stats. I guess we'll see.

I'm dreading having to call my doctor today and recount everything that happened this weekend.