Breastfeeding Advice/Problem Thread

leighann1

Breastfeeding is hard. Frustrating. Stressful. I hear it's rewarding, but this FTM has yet to get there. Post your questions and problems here, and chances are, your struggles will be echoed and supported.

leighann1

Nipple blisters: what is this fresh hell?! Anyone have experience with this? I have a tiny, very painful white dot on the tip of my nipple. Dr. Google and the lactation consultant hotline both say it's called a milk bleb. I've been told to use warm compresses and allow baby to latch when I can tolerate it. Apparently her latching will help work it out (by popping it I guess?), but in the meantime it is really unpleasant.

Would love to hear from anyone else who has had this issue. 

mal1114

Breastfeeding is hard! My baby is a preemie and just now starting to latch for some feeds (otherwise gets expressed milk... And in case you didn't know, exclusive pumping sucks), so I know my struggles are a little different than others may be. But one thing I need help with is, how do you get the baby to latch when they're screaming? I swear, sometimes my LO goes from sound asleep to uncontrollable screaming in an instant. That's usually when we just give expressed milk via bottle. But I'm trying to do more feeds by breastfeeding instead of bottle, so I'd love any tips people have about how to fix this!

Also, regarding above post, sorry I have no helpful advice for you. I'm a FTM and haven't had that problem. But I hope they improve soon!

leighann1

@mal1114 have you tried swaddling? My girl likes to flail her arms and gets herself worked up, but swaddling helps calm her down.

akfbookworm

@leighann1 I was told nipple cream after feeding to help with milk blebs, I keep forgetting to try a warm compress, but nursing seemed to help mine.

@mal1114 I second the swaddling. Have you tried getting her to latch before she fully wakes up? I also found that patting my son's bottom helps him settle down (in cradle hold). We had a rough start getting him to latch and we'd both end up in tears and with a bottle, but about a week ago it ago it finally seemed to click and has gotten better. I thought I'd be exclusively pumping forever.

nimmunogirl

@mal1114 , I hold my little one on my chest until she calms down while stroking her back and shushing her. Good luck!

whitemn04

My LO had such a shallow latch at first it hurt so bad. After 3.5 days of trying my lac consultant had me try a nipple shield and it worked wonders. The problem now is the shields are inconvenient trying to feed when I'm out and about. They make being discreet hard as I fumble around trying to hold it in place, get baby positioned and keep covered. Now he won't latch to me at all. He doesn't open wide enough and we sure tried it all and nothing. Even my consultant was a bit frustrated. She just said keep trying so I do but it's so infuriating. He's screaming cuz he's hungry, just latch on and we'd both be happy [-O<

mom4liak

mal1114 said:

Breastfeeding is hard! My baby is a preemie and just now starting to latch for some feeds (otherwise gets expressed milk... And in case you didn't know, exclusive pumping sucks), so I know my struggles are a little different than others may be. But one thing I need help with is, how do you get the baby to latch when they're screaming? I swear, sometimes my LO goes from sound asleep to uncontrollable screaming in an instant. That's usually when we just give expressed milk via bottle. But I'm trying to do more feeds by breastfeeding instead of bottle, so I'd love any tips people have about how to fix this!

Also, regarding above post, sorry I have no helpful advice for you. I'm a FTM and haven't had that problem. But I hope they improve soon!

I also have a preemie and have been exclusively pumping. We are now working on getting her to latch but she basically just screams at my nipples. We have been feeding her using Dr Brown ultra preemie bottles as they have a super slow flow. My LC thinks my milk actually flows to fast for her still and that is adding to her frustration and screaming. It was recommended that I start switching her feedings to a Bare bottle with a breastfeeding nipple to help train her how to latch correctly and that she needs to put some work in to get to the milk. I ordered the bottles but haven't tried them yet. Hopefully they help. Pumping is definitely a new level of mom craziness and frustrations.

aj2988

I dont know when to pump. At a little over 3 weeks he is feeding every 2-3 hours usually but occasionally demands at around an hour. I want to pump to get some supply for returning to work and to build my production but I want to make sure I have plenty to feed him if he wants to feed at his random times. Suggestions please!

christina4436

aj2988 said:

I dont know when to pump. At a little over 3 weeks he is feeding every 2-3 hours usually but occasionally demands at around an hour. I want to pump to get some supply for returning to work and to build my production but I want to make sure I have plenty to feed him if he wants to feed at his random times. Suggestions please!

You won't run out of milk so that's ok. Be careful addi pumps if you BF every 2-3 hours Bc once you do it you will have to continue and may overproduce. Best would be to substitute the BF for pumping like when u go back to work.

JennaEllen

Ohh, totally had a "milk bleb" week 1 of DS'S life. It freaked me out but would go down between feedings and eventually dissapeared!

valerierose15

@whitemn04 practice, practice, practice! We weaned off the nipple shield and it was pretty damn tough. It was like relearning all over again. It took about 8-9 days for him to real "get it" and his latch not to hurt.

What helped was putting the boppy underneath him, siting straight up in a chair, lining his nose to my nipple, and squeezing my breast in a u shape with one hand while holding his head in position with the other. As frustrating as it is, just keep trying!

AshJean89

My LC gave me a nipple shield before I left the hospital because I was in so much pain. I set a day that I wasn't going to use it anymore and leading up to that day I did lanolin (?) cream after every feeding even with the nipple shield just to make sure my nipples were good and healed. Then just didn't use it. Now I need to on occasion but for the most part he latches better without it. He's not a fan of it because he thinks it's a pacifier and it takes even longer for the milk to come. Good luck!

alinic916

whitemn04 said:

My LO had such a shallow latch at first it hurt so bad. After 3.5 days of trying my lac consultant had me try a nipple shield and it worked wonders. The problem now is the shields are inconvenient trying to feed when I'm out and about. They make being discreet hard as I fumble around trying to hold it in place, get baby positioned and keep covered. Now he won't latch to me at all. He doesn't open wide enough and we sure tried it all and nothing. Even my consultant was a bit frustrated. She just said keep trying so I do but it's so infuriating. He's screaming cuz he's hungry, just latch on and we'd both be happy [-O<

I'm having the same problem.  It's so hard!  The last few days DD has been so fussy I haven't tried.  But when I did try sometimes she would do it, sometimes she wouldn't.  And one side was easier than the other.  I'm just scared my nipples are going to go back to the cracked/bleeding mess they were before we used the shield.  How old is your LO?  Mine is 1 month today.  Going to keep trying to get her weaned from it because while it's nice that it helps her breastfeed, it's pretty damn inconvenient!

Mandy0360

mal1114 said:

Breastfeeding is hard! My baby is a preemie and just now starting to latch for some feeds (otherwise gets expressed milk... And in case you didn't know, exclusive pumping sucks), so I know my struggles are a little different than others may be. But one thing I need help with is, how do you get the baby to latch when they're screaming? I swear, sometimes my LO goes from sound asleep to uncontrollable screaming in an instant. That's usually when we just give expressed milk via bottle. But I'm trying to do more feeds by breastfeeding instead of bottle, so I'd love any tips people have about how to fix this!

Also, regarding above post, sorry I have no helpful advice for you. I'm a FTM and haven't had that problem. But I hope they improve soon!

@mal1114 when mine is screaming I hand express some milk into her mouth and then try to get her to latch

whitemn04

aprosch said:

whitemn04 said:

My LO had such a shallow latch at first it hurt so bad. After 3.5 days of trying my lac consultant had me try a nipple shield and it worked wonders. The problem now is the shields are inconvenient trying to feed when I'm out and about. They make being discreet hard as I fumble around trying to hold it in place, get baby positioned and keep covered. Now he won't latch to me at all. He doesn't open wide enough and we sure tried it all and nothing. Even my consultant was a bit frustrated. She just said keep trying so I do but it's so infuriating. He's screaming cuz he's hungry, just latch on and we'd both be happy [-O<

I'm having the same problem.  It's so hard!  The last few days DD has been so fussy I haven't tried.  But when I did try sometimes she would do it, sometimes she wouldn't.  And one side was easier than the other.  I'm just scared my nipples are going to go back to the cracked/bleeding mess they were before we used the shield.  How old is your LO?  Mine is 1 month today.  Going to keep trying to get her weaned from it because while it's nice that it helps her breastfeed, it's pretty damn inconvenient!

DS is 16 days. It's amazing how fast they learn something and quickly they become stubborn and not want to change. I've even tried the larger shields just to see if I could get his mouth to open wider and he struggles doing that and then my nipple feels like it's in a vice. Sometimes I feel like I'm suffocating him because when he does open I shove my massive boob in his mouth in hopes it will work just this once.. I envy and want to slap the women that claim it's so easy.

alinic916

@whitemn04  Your LO is still young so it may take a little bit longer for her to breastfeed without it.  I tried again this morning and had a good feeding.  Good latch and all.  It took her a second after she latched on before she started sucking, but it worked.  She does the same as yours, doesn't open her mouth very wide with the nipple shield.  It's probably because it's much easier to just slip it into her mouth, but when I took it off and went without this morning, she opened her mouth much wider.  I know it sucks and is frustrating, but just be patient and you'll get there, even if it takes a little longer than you'd like.  We are still working on it too.

rmdelucas

Have you tried going to a Lactation meeting.?Most hospitals offer them. I have a preemie too. I was told to do the skin on skin to calm her down then try to get her to latch. That seems to work for me.

jessforsee

Does anyone else's baby refuse to wake up to eat?? Even if she is wide awake when we start, she falls asleep almost instantly after latching. We use a nipple sheild on my right breast to help her latch better and everything and she still won't stay awake

rms924

jessforsee said:

Does anyone else's baby refuse to wake up to eat?? Even if she is wide awake when we start, she falls asleep almost instantly after latching. We use a nipple sheild on my right breast to help her latch better and everything and she still won't stay awake

I have this problem. I try waking him and purses his lips together and frowns. He suckles from on breast, stops at 7/8 min and then I have to force him to stay on for 15 min. Concerned he's not getting hind milk, especially since he is so fussy at night, waking every 90 min. Already have a lsctation consultant coming in this week but would love advice.

jessforsee

Yes same here! 7-8 minutes is fine then it's a work out to get to 15 min, I worry about hind milk too. Except she has no issues with sleeping during the night. Last night I slept threw my alarm to wake her to feed her and when I woke up she was asleep for 4 hours! I thought newborns never slept!

MandahGirly

My LO is 1 month tomorrow and we still use a nipple shield. Some days are better than others. One side is definitely easier to use without the shield. She will usually struggle initially so it can sometime take a few goes for her to stay latched. If she gets too hysterical I will put on the shield. I've heard stories of moms using a shield for months and then suddenly their baby doesn't want to use it anymore. I probably wouldn't be breastfeeding without it. Initially it was annoying to get on and stay on but it's gotten easier. It's not ideal but it works for us.

komorebi

Latch issues are almost always tongue or lip tie related. If they seem like they can't open wide you should get it evaluated.

koriemo

I had to start pumping and feeding him pumped milk, and after I gave him bottles, he wouldn't nurse anymore. Now I'm exclusively pumping and bottle feeding him, and it is SO hard. I hate "feeding the machine" as I call it. I miss snuggling with him as he eats. I am only able to pump 1-2oz at a time, so I just barely keep up with him. So frustrating.

floyd1rl

My son struggled at first with latching deep enough. He was trying to be lazy and just take the nipple. I then started doing the "boobie sandwhich" with my thumb and index on the top and rest of the fingers on the bottom and separating his lips while latching him. Now he will latch properly on his own.

My issue is that he will take himself off and it almost looks like he is shaking his head across my nipple. Almost spastic like. At first I thought it was funny, but now I'm kind of worried. Is this normal?

whitemn04

floyd1rl said:

My son struggled at first with latching deep enough. He was trying to be lazy and just take the nipple. I then started doing the "boobie sandwhich" with my thumb and index on the top and rest of the fingers on the bottom and separating his lips while latching him. Now he will latch properly on his own.

My issue is that he will take himself off and it almost looks like he is shaking his head across my nipple. Almost spastic like. At first I thought it was funny, but now I'm kind of worried. Is this normal?

My little guy shakes his head no spastically sometimes too. I think he's searching for that damn shield but he does it if we offer a pacifier sometimes too. It is kind of funny but irritating because you can't get them lined up. Another thing I hate about these shields is it will fill up so when he does swallow it's too much and he chokes. I hope we figure it out soon.

Carrmenn

Baby is waking up every single hour of the day to nurse , is this normal ? Can I over feed him?

christina4436

whitemn04 said:

floyd1rl said:

My son struggled at first with latching deep enough. He was trying to be lazy and just take the nipple. I then started doing the "boobie sandwhich" with my thumb and index on the top and rest of the fingers on the bottom and separating his lips while latching him. Now he will latch properly on his own.

My issue is that he will take himself off and it almost looks like he is shaking his head across my nipple. Almost spastic like. At first I thought it was funny, but now I'm kind of worried. Is this normal?

My little guy shakes his head no spastically sometimes too. I think he's searching for that damn shield but he does it if we offer a pacifier sometimes too. It is kind of funny but irritating because you can't get them lined up. Another thing I hate about these shields is it will fill up so when he does swallow it's too much and he chokes. I hope we figure it out soon.

Same situation here. Going on week 7 with nipple sheild for my 34 week preemie. She is spastic when searching as well. I tried the other day for 20 minutes. I was so sore after I haven't really pushed it much again. I feel bad Bc she is hungry and gets frustrated. Will it get better? Wish it came easier!

leighann1

Carrmenn said:

Baby is waking up every single hour of the day to nurse , is this normal ? Can I over feed him?

Sounds like cluster feeding, which they do when they have a growth spurt. I don't think you can overfeed with breastmilk - they will spit up any excess they get. 

Here's some info I found on cluster feedings: https://kellymom.com/parenting/parenting-faq/fussy-evening/

valerierose15

Yes to expelling breastmilk in their mouth when they are screaming. It helps to calm the baby so they know what's to come!

Yes to lanolin after every feeding! It really helps so much until you realize you don't need it anymore.

My LC said to let the baby nurse 15-20 minutes both sides each feeding so he gets the hind milk. Also she said its way easier on your nipples, rather than nurse 45-60 minutes on one side.

I hope this helps.

Knottie16288692

My baby is just a 8 hours old. I tried breast feeding in recovery. He latched pretty good but I don't think any collustrum came out. The second time he latched perfectly but just a few drops of collustrum. I've been attempting to try again for the past 3 hours and he will not latch at all. Before I delivered, my breast leaked like crazy! The nursery nurse on staff literally laughed at me because I asked if I could pump using my manual pump I brought with me. She told me it was a waste of time. Gave him a little sugar water, tried different techniques but he still won't latch. Gave him a pacifier and he's sucking away! I'm so frustrated. They are fixing to whisk him off to have a sugar test done. First day on the job and I feel like a failure!

AudraCatherine

Knottie16288692, I had wonderful nurses who taught me how to hand express. I had a hard time with my baby latching the first night and a nurse helped me hand express into a spoon and then feed my LO with the spoon. It helps to feed them and increase your milk supply. It helped me to not get stressed out about getting a good latch. LO is a month old, gaining weight, and healthy. Breastfeeding is hard work and you will have ups and downs. It is a struggle for me even now, but don't give up. And don't be too hard on yourself.

yassminemb2015

Hello Mamas,
Breastfeeding is way mord frustrating than i imagined!!
When will it get easier? When will baby start to be efficient and feeding sesaions will be short and enjoyable?
I have been feeding my baby one breast per feed to limit some oversupply i had, which got better, but sometime he nurses on the breast with normal supply for 2 long hours! Is this normal? Should i switcg breasts? (Ofcourse he will be nursing then sleeping then fussing then nursing again)
Anyone has any experience about this?

JaqiDec04

Knottie16288692 said:

My baby is just a 8 hours old. I tried breast feeding in recovery. He latched pretty good but I don't think any collustrum came out. The second time he latched perfectly but just a few drops of collustrum. I've been attempting to try again for the past 3 hours and he will not latch at all. Before I delivered, my breast leaked like crazy! The nursery nurse on staff literally laughed at me because I asked if I could pump using my manual pump I brought with me. She told me it was a waste of time. Gave him a little sugar water, tried different techniques but he still won't latch. Gave him a pacifier and he's sucking away! I'm so frustrated. They are fixing to whisk him off to have a sugar test done. First day on the job and I feel like a failure!

Request a consult with a lactation consultant, and continue to request one hourly until they show up. NO ONE should be laughing at you.

However, a baby needs VERY little to eat the first 24 hours, and my nurse wasn't even concerned about his lack of latching until he was 24 hours old. Then we started hand expressing and feeding with a dropper, and in talking very very small amounts, but the nursing staff was happy with it.

A lactation consultant came in, and helped get my baby to patch. He's lazy and doesn't try or wait for the let down. It helped to get him to patch, then I used expressed milk in a dropper in the corner of his mouth. This helped him realize that if he continued to suck, the food would come.

It's still a struggle to get him to latch, but I pump every 3 hours and bottle feed him and he's doing great.

JaqiDec04

yassminemb2015 said:

Hello Mamas,
Breastfeeding is way mord frustrating than i imagined!!
When will it get easier? When will baby start to be efficient and feeding sesaions will be short and enjoyable?
I have been feeding my baby one breast per feed to limit some oversupply i had, which got better, but sometime he nurses on the breast with normal supply for 2 long hours! Is this normal? Should i switcg breasts? (Ofcourse he will be nursing then sleeping then fussing then nursing again)
Anyone has any experience about this?

Are you sure he's swallowing. It's possible he's comfort sucking, and not actually nursing. 2 hours is a long time!

When DS seems to fall asleep, or slow down, I gently pull away, like I'm taking it. That's usually enough to wake him up and get him moving.

DD was a super fast eater. Her nursing sessions never lasted more than 10-15 minutes once we got into a routine. Even now, I can pump 3 ozs each side in less than 5 minutes. But I think I have crazy quick let down.

mal1114

Thanks for the advice everyone. Swaddling didn't help unfortunately, he's too sleepy then. Hand expressing does help somewhat. I actually have given him a little from a bottle in the position I'll breast feed to calm him and then latch him with the nipple shield. It seems to help sometimes because he doesn't really have time to realize it's not a bottle nipple. Unfortunately, despite attempts to not use the shield, he won't latch without it right now. But we'll keep trying! And I'd rather use the shield than not breast feed at all

whitemn04

I'm really struggling with the idea of introducing a bottle. I primarily want to just to make feeding when we are out easier. I still can't get LO to latch, he's 3 weeks today. The last couple days/nights he's been fussy so I haven't tried much without the shield. I feel guilty like I'm giving up. I'd still feed breast milk. I know giving a bottle won't really hurt my situation, but it won't help him latch to me. I'm ok using the shield at home it's just so awkward and inconvenient in public. I finally got a nursing cover up I'm going to practice with instead of just a blanket to see if that makes it a little easier. Ugh, I feel so torn and like I'm failing.

floyd1rl

For the past couple days my son has been pulling away while I'm nursing and starting to scream. I've tried different positions, I've burped and relatched him. He will take it again if offered so it's not like I'm forcing him or he's not hungry. I know he is getting something because I can see the milk in his mouth. Idk what is causing this reaction.

Kitta+1

Something I don't hear anyone really mention is the feeling of absolute exhaustion after a feeding.  I feel like I took a sleeping pill every time she feeds, I don't know if anyone else feels like that but I looked it up and apparently it's because of a hormone that gets released.  As a nurse, I know the medical benefits, and I've heard all the spiels about the practical benefits ... but honestly I think more moms would breastfeed successfully if the million and one breastfeeding pamphlets they shove down your throat during pregnancy actually helped prepare you for the realities of it.  It's exhausting, it's hard, and for me at least it comes with a constant paranoia that I'm not feeding often enough, that she's not getting full, that I'm not producing enough, etc.  

I'm not looking for troubleshooting, I'm just whining.  It gets weird spending so much time at home, just stewing in my own thoughts.  Not healthy, I know, it's made me a more negative person and I'm trying to work through it.

Though it does give me an idea.  I'm working on finishing my RN now, and my end goal is to be a nurse midwife.  I am going to make sure that along with the usual education of all the benefits, I'm also going to focus on preparing mothers that want to try to breastfeed for what it's going to be like.  I don't want to scare anyone off it, but I will address the importance of having a support system, sleeping whenever possible, and developing coping skills to combat the fears, exhaustion, and stress.  Do you gals have any tidbits of information not normally found in the standard literature that you wish someone had told you?  Or even something you were told that you wish had been emphasized more - or less?  I'm hoping my experience as a mother will make me a more effective and helpful midwife, but I know everyone's experience isn't the same so I am very interested in hearing what everyone else has to say!

ChariZae

@Kitta+1

What I've found most helpful was to feed on demand round the clock, and not worry about conforming to a schedule. All 3 of my kids sort of cluster fed their first two days alive which I think helped bring my milk in by day 3. I didn't worry that they were feeding every hour (or half hour), I knew that the constant simulation would bring about the supply. I also don't worry about a schedule for baby's feeding now. They will eventually get on a regular schedule on their own. So I just feed when they want, whether that's in an hour or 4 hours.

It was also useful knowing that baby's tummy was tiny at birth and that a few drops of colostrum was all they needed to be satisfied. I didn't worry about how much they were getting because I knew they didn't need much.

Other things I picked up, eat a bowl of oatmeal everyday, get plenty of fluids, SLEEP!, you don't have to nurse on both sides each session, some babies are very efficient eaters (7 mins can be enough time for them), how much I pump is no indication of how much baby is getting, and practice nursing with cover at home.

ChariZae

Let me also add that each nursing experience is unique. What works for one mom and baby doesn't work for all and you and your LO will have to learn what works for you. Connect with women who have had success with breastfeeding for support and for suggestions, but don't take everything they say as one-size fits all.