Social media rant

Winnie81_Old

My apologies if this is on another thread. I'm just irritated at my Facebook feed today as it is currently filled with babies dressed up for Halloween. I know there is nothing wrong with showing off your baby so I feel very irrational right now and will be avoiding Facebook for the next few days.

Rachd110

@wa85 I don't go on Facebook that often these days. I went on a few days ago and the first 8-10 posts were all of babies. I immediately logged off. 

agriffin92013

@WA85 I deactivated my Facebook page

mskeenan

@WA85 I feel your pain. I have gone on and off of facebook CONSTANTLY. I feel like EVERYTHING is a silly cutesy pregnancy announcement or gender reveal. I know, I'm bitter. I would be lying if I said they didn't bother me. I'm sick of EVERYTHING around me being about pregnancy.

HBamama2B

My rule has always been no Facebook or Isntagram on or near any given holiday without a out of this world bottle of red and a ton of prep. Then I run through and like everything quickly before hiding their feeds again.

khochanadel

I took a good 3-4 months off Facebook total, once right after an ex announced he and wife were pregnant, once when we started ivf, then right after fet. It was the best thing for me. Facebook would break my heart and make me feel like a terrible person for not being overcome with joy at all the cuteness.

khochanadel

Also, I think gender reveal parties are effing stupid and self-indulgent. But that's me.

mskeenan

Agreed @khochanadel . I truly think they are disgusting . Self centered and showy .

mskeenan

Ok maybe I shouldn't have said disgusting . I'm feeling hormonal and awful right now so I'm extra pissy and sensitive !

khochanadel

Well I feel like throwing up in my mouth a little every time I see one, so if you ask me disgusting is the right word.

mskeenan

@khochanadel https://www.renegademothering.com/2013/10/11/tell-me-gender-reveal-parties-arent-real/

This made me laugh so hard

HBamama2B

Lol! That's spot on. Sorry, not sorry. No gender reveal, no push present. I'm not even sure about the shower, but not sure how I can get out of that.

mskeenan

Right ?! Push present ? Since when is a baby not present enough .

calfherder

I hear you! Two friends shared on FB today a "joke" about expecting a little man in December. It's written like a pregnancy announcement but it's about Santa. Some people didn't get it and were congratulating them. I think I need a break from Facebook at least until the holidays are over.

I never even knew about gender reveal parties until reading a post about it on TB. Sounds ridiculous.

jav5y2

Facebook has been my enemy for more than two years.  I never could work up the nerve to deactivate (way to go @agriffin92013), but I definitely had to quit because it was all tears and bitterness after 5 seconds.  I deleted the app from my devices and logged off on my computer.  Amazing how the small act of having to log in really deterred me.

I am not rushing to get back on, but I feel like what/when/who I share is forever changed after all that I've been through.  Anyone else?

oxinfree

@WA85 - YES!!! Good plan avoiding it. Not sure I'll be able to manage that much, but I'll certainly be huffing and puffing at annoying posts should I come across them.

@agriffin92013 - I have been tempted to deactivate before. I just changed to "unfollowing" people so it doesn't all show up on my feed. Unfortunately its becoming more and more difficult as everyone keeps getting knocked up, leaving us in the dust. GRrrr. Dunno. It's a tough call, but agreed with @jav5y2 , kudos to you for doing it!

@calfherder - agreed... but it seems to just be one holiday after another, throw in some birthdays and random walks, and cute outfits etc etc. Its neverending. Literally. 

@mskeenan - re:reveal parties - perfectly said! words right out of my mouth.

I think in general for me, the biggest thing I've learned is that I really don't want to broadcast and flaunt our pregnancy, baby gender, and even the eventual theoretical baby on social media... if and whenever it comes to be. I refuse to post any pregnancy announcement or maternity photos or whatever on facebook...That's not to say I won't post anything baby related, but it most definitely will NOT be in the vein of "look how cute he/she is" or "how creative and amazing a mother i am" etc. etc. 

Yea. I'm cranky. Too many cute kids at my door tonight

khochanadel

Omg that article... so spot on. I had never heard of push presents. The only push present I want when the time comes is a bottle of pinot and a big ass plate of sushi.

Fwiw- I use a browser plug in called Social Fixer that lets you filter out posts with certain words (like pregnancy, baby, or Jamberry). It's not perfect and won't work on mobile, but it helps.

HaveHope&Faith

I know the feeling. My DH and I are just laying in our bed watching the World Series and I know all my friends are out with their kids trick or treating and posting everything in social media. It sucks. This holiday and the first day of school pics.

kuposa17

I tend to check it every couple of days and just do a massive "like" spree, really fast, for only 5 min cuz that's all I can handle. Like yesterday. Part of me is jealous and angry, part of me thinks they *do* actually look adorable in their costumes, and a small part of me is scared of bad FB karma for WHEN we post our own pictures someday (probably silly to worry about that). Most of the time I can't handle more than 5 min, the holiday baby/kid parade of photos can get nauseating!!

****loss mentioned***

One of my FB friends announced her MC on fb and I was actually really glad I logged on and saw that because it was so brave and honest!! My heart broke reading her post, of course, but how much courage did that take?? Obviously I wouldn't wish MC on my worst enemy, but the fact that she was able to post something so vulnerable amidst a wave of everything-in-my-life-is-perfect-yay-4-me fb posts was refreshing.

mskeenan

@kuposa17 that is incredibly brave . I have been wanting to do that but can't find the courage to do it and am afraid of people feeling sorry for me . I want to do it because I keep getting insensitive questions and comments about getting pregnant and after a loss not to mention fertility struggles they are really painful and I don't know how to respond . I almost wanna post a rant about how everyone should be more sensitive about the topic of pregnancy in general because infertility is not all that uncommon .

I was recently out with friends and one male acquaintance shouted in front of everyone "hey I heard you were pregnant " (I had just miscarried and had only told my two best friends about the pregnancy . I wanted to shout yah and I had a miscarriage thanks for asking asshole . But I couldn't . And he continued to harass me in front of a large group of friends . Nobody shut him up . I ran off and cried . Maybe a little Facebook rant would silence everyone .

Winnie81_Old

You guys have some great tips on avoiding Facebook. I think I will definitely be taking a break from it. @mskeenan I can't imagine how painful that must have felt to try and sit through someone berating you like that. He lacks common sense. I would be bothered that one of the 2 people I confided in shared that information though.

khochanadel

HaveHope&Faith Depending on which side of the fanbase you're on, the World Series game ended up being more exciting anyway

Am I the only one who thinks the "First Day of School" pics are way out of hand, anyway? I get that it only happens once a year but the saturation factor is just too much.

Oh, it's a smiling kid with a backpack? Totes original - never seen that before. Thank you for showing me your crappy cell phone picture.

At least I have somewhere where I can say what I really feel about all the offspring self-indulgence, cause I certainly can't say it on Facebook. And I have to remember to not assume everyone wants to see pictures of EVerything that happens in my littles' lives. I already told DH that when the time comes, I'd rather have a fllickr feed for people who really care for all the mundane photos.

brazenbiblio

@khochanadel I agree about only sharing pictures with those who really want to see them. I also don't see the point of first day of school pics every year. Kindergarten maybe but every year is extreme. 

mskeenan

Yes ! One of my best friends who has a baby never posts any baby pics on Facebook (maybe did when baby was first born) but posts all baby pics on a website called tiny beans . I love it bc I can go look whenever I want but she's not shoving a million baby pics in everyone's face . Wish everyone else would do this . I'm sick of the daily posts ... Look my baby did this look my baby did that . Ugh !!