Doula anyone?

imaan1215

Hi there,
Do any of you ladies have a doula, or are you planning to get one? I can't decide whether or not it's worth it.

lalala2004

I plan on having one, but I have friends and family members who are doulas, so I'm hoping they can cut me a deal.

Mostly I just want someone there during labor and delivery, so if you don't get all of the prenatal and postpartum care a doula provides, it can be less expensive, but for someone wanting an unmedicated birth in a hospital, I think it will be worth it.

Jparke2

I'm planning on getting one! I think they are mostly useful for women who want an unmedicated or home birth. That is not my plan! I just want somebody that who can advocate for me, will be there to answer questions, and coach me through! Also, doula's are trained in lots of massages and breathing techniques to help aid in getting through contractions, and usually they offer lactation information after the birth as well! I'll have my husband there obviously for support, but I love the idea of having somebody who is trained in all of these things being there at my side for the whole time!

soralette

Had one with my previous pregnancy, definitely going to have one this time, too.

If you're (or your partner is!) on the fence, pick up a copy of Penny Simkin's "The Birth Partner" and see a big list of all the ways a person can help you through childbirth -- in my (and my husband's!) opinion, it's a lot more than my husband could do on his own, and having someone who's helped other people through the process and is there solely to help *you* get through it is good, too. Remember that the *average* length of labour for a first-time mom is about 24hrs -- your partner's gonna need a break at some point (even if it's just to pee!), and a doula can help bridge the gap so you're not alone when that happens.

The nurses/midwife (if you have one) will be helpful, too, but there're limits on how much they can do! OBs don't help at all with the actual labouring part, imx; they're there to make sure you're healthy, baby's healthy, and that the delivery goes safely, and that's about it -- an OB won't massage your back when you need it, for example.

Charla1224

I really want one. Need to find out if I can pay for it with my HSA though.

dsmith211

I haven't decided yet, but my HSA says it's not a covered expense. So if I do it will be out of pocket so it really depends on how much I can spend after the necessities.

BlueJuice

I had one for my last delivery and it was great. I also trained and worked as a doula for awhile. This time I'm hoping to have a home birth with my midwife and her team, and I probably won't need that specific person, as my midwife's team has some training in that regard as well.

Charla1224

Glad you've checked into it @dsmith211 we might still do it I'm just trying to figure out what all I can pay using HSA because our enrollment is opening and I'd like to beef things up where I can.

seasalt123

A friend of mine recommended I get one as I intend to be in the delivery room alone. I've never liked the idea of having my SO there and thankfully he agrees.

It's something I will talk to my midwife about. Sometimes when I am going through something physically challenging I want to just get in the zone and power through it. So I am unsure if having someone there whose purpose is to interact with me is the right choice. I will try to learn more about this as an option as time goes on.

kwilson7613

I've been back and forth about it a lot. I plan on at least talking to a few and finding out pricing, since that's my biggest thing at this point. Also, I'm not sure how my DH feels about having someone else in the room, but I guess we'll see.

I DO know that most doulas seem to think having an advocate and birth coach is so important that they will work with you cost-wise. One I am planning on meeting with is $600, which was less than I thought. I'm sure it depends on the doula, but maybe it's a more affordable option than most of us realize.

scarletangel2006

Any of the women that support having a doula what is you thoughts on twin delivery? There is a high chance for csection although i want to try and avoid it. Is it still something worth the expense? Or is it better to put that money towards the million other expenses that come with twins?

dsmith211

Charla1224 said:

Glad you've checked into it @dsmith211 we might still do it I'm just trying to figure out what all I can pay using HSA because our enrollment is opening and I'd like to beef things up where I can.

If you're able I would still check with yours. It's kinda a grey area. I did find some companies who said it was allowable whereas mine said it was not. It's actually ultimately up to the IRS, bc the allowable vs not is due to tax reasons on your HSA funds. I'm going to err on the side of caution bc I was told no explicitly, but some things I read said so long as it was just for childbirth and not afterwards for childcare needs then you would probably be ok.

mschill22

Yes!! I had heard wonderful things from multiple people regarding the birthing center in the hospital I chose. On the top of that list was the doula service provided. I heard from many friends that they are not only knowledgable and friendly, advocates, accommodating etc. but...I just got the best news. It is free!! It's a volunteer program and I guess they are wry selective about who they choose to volunteer.

lalala2004

scarletangel2006 said:

Any of the women that support having a doula what is you thoughts on twin delivery? There is a high chance for csection although i want to try and avoid it. Is it still something worth the expense? Or is it better to put that money towards the million other expenses that come with twins?

My cousin had her twins vaginally with a midwife at a birth center. It can be done. I think she figured if she went to a hospital, she would be more likely to get a c section. She wasn't at high risk in any other way.

dsmith211

lalala2004 said:

scarletangel2006 said:

Any of the women that support having a doula what is you thoughts on twin delivery? There is a high chance for csection although i want to try and avoid it. Is it still something worth the expense? Or is it better to put that money towards the million other expenses that come with twins?

My cousin had her twins vaginally with a midwife at a birth center. It can be done. I think she figured if she went to a hospital, she would be more likely to get a c section. She wasn't at high risk in any other way.

It really depends on the state. I live in Florida and state law actually prohibits midwives from providing care to women carrying multiples. It's considered an automatic risk factor here. It can be done, but I'd look up the laws local to where you may be.

scarletangel2006

I was at a birth center. Once they did the ultrasound i was referred to a new clinic. Birth centers here dont handle multiples.

imaan1215

Thank you all for responding! I'm setting up appointments to meet with a few women.

BlueJuice

I trained as a birth doula, although my certifications have now lapsed and I don't plan to get them renewed. I did have the opportunity to work with a friend of mine who was having twins. Because of their placement they ended up being a planned cesarean, however she still had me in the surgery room with her and her husband. I was able to assist with her emotional support (a cesarean is different than vaginal childbirth in terms of the challenges, obviously, but it can still be emotionally stressful to be awake under surgery, to not be able to see what is happening, etc). There isn't really a person in a surgery team who's intended to be there strictly for emotional support or to answer questions for the mother, beyond their partner. Her husband has a fairly weak stomach and was emotionally nervous as well, so I provided support to him as well, plus I was able (with her surgery team's permission) to come around the curtain and take some photos at her request of the babies' delivery. With twins it was also helpful to have an extra set of personal hands to hold babies, rather than having to have one of them be held by a nurse. The one thing I will caution is that not all hospitals or surgeons will permit an additional person to enter the surgery as a support person. I got the impression that they weren't thrilled with my presence but did allow it, whereas if I had been a non-professional support person (her mother or 'just' her best friend) it probably would have been refused.

araecasey

Had a doula last time, and I've invited the same doula to be part of this birth. I had prodromal labor and a hard birth and recovery, and she was with us supporting both of us every step of the way. She even did a grocery trip for us and did our laundry that first week postpartum when I desperately needed help. We paid for her out of pocket, I think it was 400 or 500? Worth every penny.