A bit of advice. — The Bump

A bit of advice.

Hey all, new to the board signed up in order to be able to post this question, hopefully someone can set my mind at rest.

Basically, the father of my baby left me when I was 2 weeks away from giving birth, saying he wanted nothing to do with us, this came out of the blue and I felt very hurt by this obviously.

He completely walked out, as in didn't even try to get in contact with us what so ever, even after she was born. I was upset at first but then I figured at the end of the day it is his loss.

However, in the last couple of months, he has come back into the picture, phoning me with nasty phone calls and he is saying he is just gonna come and take her???!!

He can't just show up and take her can he? He just has me thinking all kinds of horrible thoughts, I certainly hope he can't do that. 

I'm just trying to get as much advice as possible as my head is in a bit of a spin with all this.

He isn't listed on her birth certificate as the dad, so I'm not sure if that makes any difference?

What is the situation at the moment, do I even have to let him see her?

Thanks for any help.


Re: A bit of advice.

  • I'd get a lawyer. He can't do that, you may want to see about showing the texts to the police if he is threatening to take your little one. If he's making threats, I wouldn't let him see your little one. I'm sorry you are going through this.
  • I would also highly recommend pushing supervised visitation in this scenario. Best of luck to you, and remember to your child, you are the only person who matters. You've got this, no matter how stressful the situation gets.
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  • Thanks very much for the replies everyone, I am going to get a restraining order on him just in case, At the moment these are just threats, he has not actually acted on them....yet.

    I'm going to take much of the advice here and just make sure I am prepared, thanks once again.  
  • Document - Document - Document!!!  Yes, call the (non)emergency line if threatened, and emergency line if you truly feel threatened for your safety.  Having a case number if this thing goes to court is important.

    Hire a great lawyer because this could get messy.  He can petition for paternity testing, and eventually custody pending the results.  A great attorney will walk you through the steps and petition the court.  A lot really depends on what your state laws are.  I would go as far as saying consult the attorney first before the restraining order if possible as some states have higher thresholds than others when it comes to such matters.  Above all else, you want your ducks in a row!!!

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