Going on a cruise past the pregnancy limit??

blonde_mama

Hey Ladies! I need some advice.

So my parents have been saving up and they just surprised our whole family with a cruise over Christmas! Super excited! That being said, I will be 24.5 weeks getting on and the limit for pregnant women is exactly 24 weeks (meaning I'm not suppose to be past 23w 6d at all while on the ship).

My family doesn't know I'm pregnant yet because we want to suprise them in a few weeks when they come to visit. I'm torn as to whether or not I should try and go on the cruise anyway. I would hate to miss it by one week but also know that there are risks involved.

What would you do?

(A little background: This is baby #2. This pregnancy has been uneventful so far. I carried baby #1 full term with no complications).

Julesby

Does the cruise ship require verification of the week of your pregnancy? Will they kick you off without a doctor's note like the airlines have been doing?

If they won't kick you off and your doctor clears you, I'd go. But, I'd pay for trip insurance.

mrstrax

Sounds like you don't really have an option other than moving up the trip. Many cruises require a doctors note to "prove" the point in your pregnancy and for good reason - this was just a few months ago: https://nypost.com/2015/09/25/premature-1-5-pound-baby-survives-cruise-ship-birth/

Reddingite810

Which cruise line are you going on?  I'm taking a Royal Caribbean cruise at the end of the month and I just emailed them to confirm what type of documentation would be needed.  They, at least, do not require a doctor's note.  However, it definitely would still be a risk.

Goldsgirl9

Pp is correct. 2.5 yrs ago when we went to Alaska on Royal Caribbean I had to provide a doctors note stating I was in good health as well as when I was due, how many weeks I would be at start of cruise and how many weeks at end of cruise. I made the cut off by only a couple days. Every cruise line has a different cut off from what I understand.

Take a copy with you on the plane if your travel requires air transportation. We also bought trip insurance.

Edited for addition and spelling.

blonde_mama

@Julesby yeah I'm suppose to bring a doctors note stating my due date and that I'm fit to travel. From what I've heard though, they will only ask to see it if I look clearly pregnant. Last pregnancy, I didn't have a noticeable bump until 27 weeks. I'm 16 weeks now and there's no bump at all so my hope is that I'd be able to walk on without them noticing as long as I wear a hoodie or something.

@mrstrax that is really scary! Definitely have a lot to consider.

cmjenkies

I was going to say, I wouldn't have thought anything of it before hearing about the preemie that was fighting for his life recently on a cruise ship.

I also think the idea of a cruise is slightly terrifying so that would probably sway me already, lol.

NachosAndPeaches

While I'm all for bending the rules, I wouldnt go, unless it's a trip where you could be helicoptered to the us (like some of the ones that leave from Southern California). At 24 weeks your baby is viable. If something were to happen, your baby would have a good chance of surviving, but with a LONG NICU stay. I would not want to be away from the US during his time. This is typically why Drs are okay with CONUS type travel during third tri.

eastdurian

I'm such a rule follower that I probably wouldn't go. I'd be really mad at myself if I'd been warned, went ahead and something bad happened.

I'll be flying at 34-35 weeks but it's a short flight and so far the doctor and airline would be on board for that, I'm not booking the flight yet just in case my Dr suggest I go earlier for any reason.

mrstrax

Also, remember that a cruise is like driving to the middle of no where - you have to drive all the way back to get somewhere to THEN get flown to a hospital. A cruise sounds great and the risk is low that anything would happen, but you could also go into labor a half days sail from land and have to wait that whole time to get to a place where they could then fly you/baby to a hospital. I'd move it up or talk to your parents about a trip on land - even outside the US you'd be closer to medical equipment than on a ship.

Knottie1453324528

I am actually going in a cruise as well & leave the day after Christmas. I mentioned it to my doctor & she said I would have to come in for a check & she would provide a letter to say I am cleared to travel.

NachosAndPeaches

NachosAndPeaches said:

While I'm all for bending the rules, I wouldnt go, unless it's a trip where you could be helicoptered to the us (like some of the ones that leave from Southern California). At 24 weeks your baby is viable. If something were to happen, your baby would have a good chance of surviving, but with a LONG NICU stay. I would not want to be away from the US during his time. This is typically why Drs are okay with CONUS type travel during third tri.

Aslo just to give you some bearing on my bending of rules: I rode every roller coaster at Disney at 15 weeks, I eat sushi, and have un microwaved turkey sandwhiches. But I really would urge you to request a domestic vacation after 24 weeks!

sarahufl

I ate a turkey and brie sandwich for lunch. And regular coffee for breakfast.

But I wouldn't go on the cruise. Those rules exist for a reason.

AmadorRose

@NachosAndPeaches hahaha do other people use CONUS and OCONUS? I got a good chuckle out of this, so thank you!

JadaBlue

I wouldn't do it because I would never forgive myself if something happened. On the other hand I live in a country with substandard medical care and won't medevac to somewhere appropriate until I'm 34 weeks (international travel ban), so my position is logically inconsistent. I think I would also resent having to be deceitful.

pinottoparenthood

Agreed with PPs... although I feel like that half a week is negligible, the cruise line won't feel that way. You probably won't be able to go. Is there a reason you have to wait to tell your family? Can you go ahead and tell them now and just ask if they can move the cruise up a little bit?

pinottoparenthood

NachosAndPeaches said:

While I'm all for bending the rules, I wouldnt go, unless it's a trip where you could be helicoptered to the us (like some of the ones that leave from Southern California). At 24 weeks your baby is viable. If something were to happen, your baby would have a good chance of surviving, but with a LONG NICU stay. I would not want to be away from the US during his time. This is typically why Drs are okay with CONUS type travel during third tri.

Aslo just to give you some bearing on my bending of rules: I rode every roller coaster at Disney at 15 weeks, I eat sushi, and have un microwaved turkey sandwhiches. But I really would urge you to request a domestic vacation after 24 weeks!

Microwaved turkey sandwich = 

tdart14

I wouldn't do it. The cruise line doesn't want you aboard at that point due to safety concerns, thus the rule.

How would you feel if disregarded that and lost the baby because of it? That may be blunt but it is a possibility when you wouldn't have access to proper medical care for goodness knows how long.

eastdurian

sarahufl said:

I ate a turkey and brie sandwich for lunch. And regular coffee for breakfast.

But I wouldn't go on the cruise. Those rules exist for a reason.

We've been having turkey, brie + cranberry butter sandwiches and they're to die for. I also had soft eggs this morning with my first of probably two regular cups of coffee today.

I still wouldn't go on the cruise.

eastdurian

JadaBlue said:

I wouldn't do it because I would never forgive myself if something happened. On the other hand I live in a country with substandard medical care and won't medevac to somewhere appropriate until I'm 34 weeks (international travel ban), so my position is logically inconsistent. I think I would also resent having to be deceitful.

I just missed the window of medevac. I can't actually even go to post because I'll be 35.5 weeks before DH is expected to arrive.

ETA hopefully your flight isn't too long! Will you come back to the States or a hub like Singapore?

JadaBlue

@eastdurian My flight will be torture, about 30 hours travel time if I go back to the U.S. Thus I'm considering Singapore, but it depends on our next assignments since we're transferring next summer.

blonde_mama

Thanks for all your input girls! Definitely gives me alot to think about. 

Some of you mentioned moving the cruise up a couple weeks or asking my parents to plan a different trip. That would be ideal but the reason I haven't done that is because I come from a very large family. I am the oldest of 10 kids, not including 3 in-laws and 3 grandchildren. The dates are set because my parents had to work around when everyone could get time off work. So 18 members of my immediate family will be there as well as grandparents and aunts/uncles/cousins. It's a huge trip. 

We would have planned all this better if they wouldn't have surprised us recently with the trip. Also, the reason they still don't know we are expecting is because last pregnancy we told everyone right away so we thought it would be fun to wait and surprise my parents when they come to visit in 3 weeks for their 26th year anniversary. We are going to take them to our gender ultrasound appointment (so excited!) Telling them I'm pregnant now, won't change the trip. It will just ruin our surprise at this point lol. 

I'm not a rule breaker by nature. I never try and buck the system. However, in this case, my options are to stay at my parents house with my toddler alone over christmas (because I wouldn't make my husband stay with me. He deserves to go have fun with everyone else) or go on the cruise anyway knowing that I would be taking the risk. I just need to figure out if that's a decision I'd be willing to live with, you know? 

sarahufl

eastdurian said:

sarahufl said:

I ate a turkey and brie sandwich for lunch. And regular coffee for breakfast.

But I wouldn't go on the cruise. Those rules exist for a reason.

We've been having turkey, brie + cranberry butter sandwiches and they're to die for. I also had soft eggs this morning with my first of probably two regular cups of coffee today.

I still wouldn't go on the cruise.

I just ate runny eggs on top of goat cheese.

It was so delicious.

NachosAndPeaches

I want Brie. Yummmmm.

OP: how long is the cruise and where is it to?

blonde_mama

@nachosandpeaches it's 5 days/4 nights. Cozumel and Grand Cayman Islands

runlong3

Have they already purchased the trip? If not, why a cruise? You could still do international travel, such as going to Mexico or even just something as simple as renting a house(s) along the gulf. There are lots of other vacation ideas that don't involve a cruise.

blonde_mama

@runlong3 Yes. They have purchased it. It has been a dream of my parents to take the whole family on a cruise. They have been saving for a couple years and finally were able to make it happen. 

runlong3

That is a tough spot. I am with every one what though for telling your parents now and see their thoughts. They may be game for postponing or going somewhere else especially if they bought trip insurance. You never know, but taking about it sooner rather than later gives them more options.

I also agree that I would not go. Unfortunately, you do have to think of worst case scenario. Are you willing to risk your child's life if something happens and you have the baby on the boat? It will be viable at that point in a hospital, but with no guarantees. But who knows for how long on a ship, if at all.

Julesby

I feel as if some of the previous posters are treating this as if you are seriously breaking the rule. You aren't. You will be a few days passed the rule. Yes, it is a risk. But, how big of a risk is up to you and your doctor to determine.

Have you looked at the itinerary for the cruise your parents purchased? If it doesn't have any "at sea" days, then chances are, you are likely to be somewhat near land at all times (in theory). 

It's definitely a difficult decision, but I don't think you should count it out just yet. These are my two cents, coming from a person who generally follows rules, but realizes that Americans can be crazy uptight when it comes to pregnancy. 

sarahufl

Julesby said:

I feel as if some of the previous posters are treating this as if you are seriously breaking the rule. You aren't. You will be a few days passed the rule. Yes, it is a risk. But, how big of a risk is up to you and your doctor to determine.

How is this not breaking the rule?

eastdurian

JadaBlue said:

@eastdurian My flight will be torture, about 30 hours travel time if I go back to the U.S. Thus I'm considering Singapore, but it depends on our next assignments since we're transferring next summer.

GL! 30 hours sucks, it took us about 26 hours to get home, but I can't imagine not being at post or in the US. Singapore is fantastic but I can't imagine being there for like 3 months pregnant or with a newborn.

RebekahA83

I'd wait to tell your family. Trip is already purchased at this point. The rest is up to you and your doctor to decide. It would be very hard for me to miss out on that time with my family, so I completely understand where you are coming from! If your doctor says it's okay and you aren't too far from land for the majority of the cruise, I'd probably go. Good luck and keep us updated on your decision

AEG84

Julesby said:

I feel as if some of the previous posters are treating this as if you are seriously breaking the rule. You aren't. You will be a few days passed the rule. Yes, it is a risk. But, how big of a risk is up to you and your doctor to determine.

Have you looked at the itinerary for the cruise your parents purchased? If it doesn't have any "at sea" days, then chances are, you are likely to be somewhat near land at all times (in theory). 

It's definitely a difficult decision, but I don't think you should count it out just yet. These are my two cents, coming from a person who generally follows rules, but realizes that Americans can be crazy uptight when it comes to pregnancy. 

I agree with Jules about looking at the itinerary. Cozumel/Grand Cayman especially seems unlikely to be very far from land. Ultimately, if your doctor gives you the ok to travel at that point in time, and the itinerary works, I would want to go.

You'll be a few days past their limits...not a few weeks or more. It would be a different story at, say, 32 weeks or further.

Julesby

sarahufl said:

Julesby said:

I feel as if some of the previous posters are treating this as if you are seriously breaking the rule. You aren't. You will be a few days passed the rule. Yes, it is a risk. But, how big of a risk is up to you and your doctor to determine.

How is this not breaking the rule?

She's going to be a few days past their arbitrary cut-off, not a few weeks. It's not as if something magically happens to make it less safe for her to travel at exactly 24 weeks and 0 days. 

You must be one of those people who pitches all food right at the sell by/good by date... yikes!

blonde_mama

@Julesby and @AEG84 I never thought about looking at the itinerary! I would rest a little easier knowing we wouldn't really be out in the middle of nowhere for days at a time.

NachosAndPeaches

Julesby said:

sarahufl said:

Julesby said:

I feel as if some of the previous posters are treating this as if you are seriously breaking the rule. You aren't. You will be a few days passed the rule. Yes, it is a risk. But, how big of a risk is up to you and your doctor to determine.

How is this not breaking the rule?

She's going to be a few days past their arbitrary cut-off, not a few weeks. It's not as if something magically happens to make it less safe for her to travel at exactly 24 weeks and 0 days. 

You must be one of those people who pitches all food right at the sell by/good by date... yikes!

Actually that's not true. 24 weeks is viability. At that gestational age all hospitals will offer life saving measures. Some hospitals (usually non Catholic ones) will offer life saving measures earlier but sometimes parents opt out of them due to the prognosis before 24 weeks.

mrstrax

NachosAndPeaches said:

Julesby said:

sarahufl said:

Julesby said:

I feel as if some of the previous posters are treating this as if you are seriously breaking the rule. You aren't. You will be a few days passed the rule. Yes, it is a risk. But, how big of a risk is up to you and your doctor to determine.

How is this not breaking the rule?

She's going to be a few days past their arbitrary cut-off, not a few weeks. It's not as if something magically happens to make it less safe for her to travel at exactly 24 weeks and 0 days. 

You must be one of those people who pitches all food right at the sell by/good by date... yikes!

Actually that's not true. 24 weeks is viability. At that gestational age all hospitals will offer life saving measures. Some hospitals (usually non Catholic ones) will offer life saving measures earlier but sometimes parents opt out of them due to the prognosis before 24 weeks.

Also, she'd be leaving after 24 weeks, meaning she's over a week past the rule, not a few days. You're supposed to be done with your trip by 24 weeks, not starting.

mrstrax

OP, I don't mean for you to feel bullied as this becomes a "debate". I, at least, mean any woman in your situation, not just you when it comes to cruise rules.

Also, why couldn't YH take your toddler with him on the cruise and you have "just you" time instead of being stuck by yourself with a toddler? Maybe plan yourself a spa day and some girl time?

allaire314

I had no idea about cruise restrictions before this post - just figured it all fell under the whole don't travel after 36 weeks kind of deal... But looking at a few different cruise lines, it doesn't really seem to be up to you whether you want to go or not... Unless your Dr is willing to lie for you about your due date. Seems to be a cut and dry issues with most cruises - absolutely not after 24 weeks, so definitely look into the specifics of the cruise line you would be going on.

sarahufl

Julesby said:

sarahufl said:

Julesby said:

I feel as if some of the previous posters are treating this as if you are seriously breaking the rule. You aren't. You will be a few days passed the rule. Yes, it is a risk. But, how big of a risk is up to you and your doctor to determine.

How is this not breaking the rule?

She's going to be a few days past their arbitrary cut-off, not a few weeks. It's not as if something magically happens to make it less safe for her to travel at exactly 24 weeks and 0 days. 

You must be one of those people who pitches all food right at the sell by/good by date... yikes!

****Boxes*****

The cut-offs are for a reason. 

And no, I do not eat spoiled food and neither should you.

blonde_mama

@mrstrax thank you for saying that. I would love to have some "me time" but our son is only 16 months and sending him with DH for 5 days without cell phone service to check on him would really stress me out lol.

@allaire314 it is a cut and dry rule. 24 weeks. No exceptions unless I don't report my pregnancy beforehand. They would have no way of knowing otherwise. I carry very small so it would be easy for me to walk right on without anyone suspecting I'm pregnant. Not saying it's the smartest plan but it's an option I have.