High needs baby

jessbruxanovaa

I was reading over the features of a high need baby and my son meets every single one of them! He is so demanding and impatient and cries instantly after being put down. The moment he is uncomfortable, that very moment he screams and shrieks. I have 2 friends who just had their babies as well and they are very calm, nowhere near as sensitive as mine. I love him to death though! Anyone else feel this way?

jwebbbber45678

I read that crying is the very last sign a baby will give you to show hunger and that you should pick up on his hunger cues before that. Well my baby goes from contentedly sleeping to frantically screaming in a matter of seconds when he wakes up. He cries like a maniac until I get him on the boob. I feel like whenever he's awake he's eating or crying. I do not have a mellow baby and it is very difficult to deal with.

thinkpink101

Yes, my LO is like that as well and so were (are) his older brothers. There's no ramping up to hunger cues/crying etc. it's all or nothing.

CocoR04

(Lurking from Oct15) I had a high needs baby and now he's a high needs toddler! I read a lot of Dr. Sears articles on how to identify his needs and meet them. Baby wearing was huge, swaddling, and basically holding him all the time that I could. He didn't have colic, but I cut certain things out of my diet to see if it helped. He definitely had reflux, so that had a lot to do with him wanting to be held. Sleeping was terrible until 16 months or so.

I feel for you! DS now has a very fun, sweet, energetic, but stubborn personality. He still wants to be held a lot and seems to need more physical comfort than other toddlers we know. Hoping this new LO (due in 2 weeks) is less needy!!

Mandii385

DD1 was super high needs however since I didn't know it wasn't "the norm" I didn't think much about it. She is now 21 months and still super needy and busy but it's a lot easier. When's I found out I was pregnant with DD2 who is now 7 weeks I was terrified cause I didn't think I could handle two high needs kids at once. But this DD2 is complete opposite. She sleeps all the time never cries never spits up etc. hang in there! The only way I could put dd1 down or get her to sleep was in her swing and we ended up buying a mamaroo. She didn't nap until she was 6 months old. She would sleep for 30 min stretches at night. It was the roughest ever and no one seemed to believe me when I told them I didn't think it was normal. But now having a LO who sleeps most of hhe time I see how busy dd1 really was!! If us have any specific questions or need tips or anything feel free to message me, I've been where you are!

kmcshane0211

I definitely am now convinced our daughter is high needs. She doesn't scream instantly like some describe but when she wants something she wants it and if you don't move fast enough it will escalate very quickly and then she's very difficult to soothe (arching her back when I hold her, batting me away, turning her head, crying). The only thing that soothes her when she gets like this (at least a few times a day) is to hold her upright, turn her outward and walk to a window so the sunlight floods her and she's forced to close her eyes. She's been like this since birth.... Screaming inside? Instantly quiet outside. I'm thinking it has to do with the sensory input from being outside that calms her. I'm hoping she doesn't have sensory processing issues.

She is a very charismatic, happy girl usually (when her needs are met! The basics and then loads of time with momma!) but CLINGY. She's just not very content and fusses a lot for you to change things up, hates when I sit and wants new toys/sights/ sounds constantly. I can really only set her down to "play" alone for maybe 5 minutes. If she notices that I'm gone from the room she cries. She will play independently in her rock n play for about 20 minutes as long as she can see me! So I'm excited for her to start sitting up and going in her high chair, saucer, etc. I'll carry her as much as I can but my back needs a break!

Luckily, We have been able to get her to take naps in her crib. She's a crap napper but at least I can put her down.

I spent the first couple months thinking there was something wrong with me. Was I just not good at mothering? I always envisioned being the kind of mom who is so in tune with her baby's needs but my daughter is incredibly challenging to read!

Anyone else realize they have a HN baby?

ElleMF728

My first was a high needs baby but honestly, he is a really easy toddler.  He is happy all the time, plays independently, so smart and curious.  Everyone tells me how luck I am that I have such happy kids but it wasn't always that way.  Having a 6 month old and a 2.5 year old feels like a breeze compared to just DS1 when he was a baby.  I think my first was just so desperate to be able to see and learn about the world, he so wanted to be able to run around and play that he was just really uncomfortable with "baby stuff".  It was almost overnight that once he started being able to get around a bit easier by himself that he turned a corner and started having such a sunny like personality.  He still has a ton of energy though and goes from sun up to sun down only crashing at nap and bedtime. 

When he spends time with my Mom and Dad every so often and its just me and DS2 I'm so bored!  I can watch whole movies, take a 1.5 hour nap, sit down to eat, clean the whole house, shower and get ready its ridiculous.  I was never able to do any of those things when DS1 was a baby.  

Bellarose212

I'm not sure if my little guy is high needs or if it's just a phase. His pediatrician said he's very "demanding" and I couldn't agree more! He never lets me put him down and I'm exhausted. But it's hard to tell if this is behavior from the 4th leap combined with the 4 month sleep regression or if it's actually his personality. All I know is that I really need a break. I'm going to my parents house next week so I can get some extra help (and sleep!) to get through this rough period. My husband is working late everyday and has been sick, so I've been taking care of the baby all day everyday. This mama needs a break!

missliz53

I definitely have a high needs baby. When she's hungry she wants her food right now and 1 second is too long to wait. She also gets bored easily. But I wear her when I need to do things around the house because now that she can face out, she's very interested in what I'm doing. Most of the time I eat breakfast and lunch with her in my lap and she takes her late afternoon and evening nap on me or the house vibrates and the pets all flee.

It's hard at this stage because she gets bored so easily and there's only so many things you can do with a 4-month old and sometimes mommy really just needs to sit down for an hour to recharge. But when she's happy, she's a delight and she has the biggest smiles and giggles.

jessbruxanovaa

I remember writing this post back in October and I can honestly say my son is indeed still a very high needs baby. More now than before actually. Always wants to be carried. He won't last in his bouncer for more than 5-10 minutes. We always hold him because he just HAS to be TOUCHING us otherwise he's shrieking, screaming his head off. He's hard to soothe when he gets pissed off and the only thing that almost always works is picking him up. He's so clingy to mommy I actually love it.

natback

Us too! I think our babies are going to be very smart and curious toddlers so I'm ok with it:)

LoveLee85

My baby is mellow/happy, yet high maintenance. I mean, I would be 'high maintenance' too if I couldn't do anything for myself. Lol! I have nothing to compare LO to since I'm a FTM. Are their low maintenance babies??

ElleMF728

LoveLee85 said:

My baby is mellow/happy, yet high maintenance. I mean, I would be 'high maintenance' too if I couldn't do anything for myself. Lol! I have nothing to compare LO to since I'm a FTM. Are their low maintenance babies??

LOL yes.  DS2 is low maintenance.  He is happy, easy to please, content to hang out in his jumper or on his activity mat.  I can take showers, eat meals, even take the occasionally nap if the stars align and they both sleep at the same time. I only wake up twice a night and I am allowed to pee by myself unless my 2 year old needs water or a snack.  None of these things were the case with my first baby. 

kmcshane0211

@LoveLee85 In the past three days since I posted this (not kidding), my baby has mellowed significantly. I've NEVER been able to put her in something (swing, bouncer, activity mat) for longer than 5-10 minutes before crying for me to pick her up. Friday, she sat in her RNP for 25 minutes while I cooked!

She still requires LOTS of change (switching activities every 10 minutes or so) but I think that's just how her brain works!

My husband phrased it well. When she's good she's amazing. When she's not, she's a terror. I'm actually the same way bc I'm moody. Guess she's like me probably!

jwebbbber45678

Never have been able to put this kid down for a nap in his life! The only way to get him to sleep is holding him.