Have to go it alone now — The Bump
Single Parents

Have to go it alone now

13 weeks pregnant and just discovered my now ex has been cheating on me the past 2 months with multiple girls. I am extremely livid. Not only do I need to go and get tested for stds again, I now have to figure out a new plan for myself and baby because I have cut all ties with him. So upset and angry that he would do this to me.

Re: Have to go it alone now

  • Well... Here's the thing about STD testing.  You can get a test right away but if you've caught something, it might take some time to show up in a test.  I would talk it over with your doctor.  I say this because my ex cheated on me with a girl who he called "the town bicycle" (seriously), and when I talked to my doctor about it, he told me he could put my mind at ease at the moment with a test, but it would be best if we took it later in my pregnancy (I found out at 2.5 mo that he was cheating on me with her, we took the second test when I was 7.5/8 mo pregnant).

    I understand the anger and I understand how awful this is.  Good for you for not putting up with that shit.  However, and maybe it's just my situation, cutting him off might make your situation worse.  First, let me tell you about my situation: During my pregnancy, I told him that he will never meet my DD, I refused to answer any call/text I received (all two of them), he got in a car accident that nearly killed him and I decided that I would allow him a chance at being in her life (there's a little more to this, but I'm just summarizing), he appeared 3 times and has disappeared since.  It will be 2 years in January that we last saw him.  I have a friend who cut off her ex and he has been a vindictive little asshole since the baby was born, trying to force his way back into her life so he can pretend he's the best father on the planet.  You're only 13 weeks, you have a ways to go so you have some time to think about the best course of action.  But, again, I totally feel you on what you're going through right now.  You can PM me if you want to talk more about it.

    As for "a new plan", do you have insurance?  I keep talking about this website because it has been a godsend to me  www.allkidscovered.com.  If you don't have insurance, sign up for all kids, I believe it covers you during your pregnancy too.  DD has been on all kids since she was 3 mo and it has lightened the load for me.
    Lilypie Kids Birthday tickers
  • Same thing happen to me. Im praying for you
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