Can't conceive, may adopt

misshopeful1

Hi, I'm new to the bump. I've been around a couple weeks.

Our TTC road has been awful. We've been married 8 years, NTNP our whole marriage.
We've been seeing an RE since last December. After a surgery and total of 7 unsuccessful cycles of femara we're still not pregnant and my diagnosis is unexplained infertility. My husband is healthy.

I think we are at the point we'll stop TTC. We considered adoption in the past. We feel this is our best chance at parenthood.

It will be a big transition and the finality of our decision is still sinking in.

Knottie1442268460

We're adopting through foster care you've probably read as I've posted in other threads. We didn't plan to adopt so I think this would be s very rough road for someone trying to adopt. But the price is right. . FWIW I know of a domestic adoption with FASD so birth issues are not limited to foster care adoptions.

alanna3622

@misshopeful1 sorry you are in this situation. It can be very jarring to change paths, especially after hanging in there for so long.

When we first decided to adopt (we are preferential adopters), I was fascinated by adoption documentaries. The Dark Matter of Love is on Vimeo, and A Siberian Adoption Story is on YouTube.

Why don't you check them out and see how you feel afterwards? It can also be a nice way to talk to your husband about adoption in a neutral way.

somewhereinafrica

I am sorry you have had such a hard time trying to conceive.

When it comes to considering adoption you may want to explore some groups that have lots of adoptees as well as adoptive parents to really learn about the ins and outs of adoption. One thing that comes up a lot on these is how infertility grief can impact the parent and child relationship. Adopting is also taking on the grief and loss of your child's first family and supporting them through that, which can be hard when someone is grieving there own losses when it comes to an infertility diagnose. I would suggest doing research on Facebook groups and search out some adoptee blogs to get a real broad perspective on what adoption will mean for you and all party's involved.

Adoption can be a the best path for you be parenthood but to be sure I think it's worth trying to separate the infertility and adoption and address both separately.