My UO is that I get rather annoyed when folk give non-US maternity leave such glowing reviews. Granted, I completely think the US system is majorly flawed, but most *other* countries do not give months and months of full paid time off. Many countries only give a fraction of one's salary, and usually for only a limited amount of time. Still flawed. Esp if mom is the primary income for the house.
That's because the majority of US maternity leave is unpaid unless you have sick time built up or have short term disability. It doesn't matter if the woman is the primary or secondary income for a family. In many other countries at least they are compensated for their maternity leave. And of course, no system is perfect, but I believe there are better ways to do it than how it's done in the US.
My UO is if there is a thread about formula feeding, why the heck would you go in there to spout breast is best, there are a lot of us who can't breastfeed feed for whatever reason. I've got some medical reasons, to go in and judge makes you a bad person. If you would rather my son starve, you come tell his sweet face. I'm sleep deprived and angry.
This! Some women can't BF at all and some can't BF exclusively. That doesn't mean anyone's trying to say breast isn't "best," and you know what, formula is a damn good substitute when breastfeeding isn't possible.
And for some, breastfeeding is just too difficult and doesn't fit their life, and that is ok too!
@millereliz13 that statement "breast is best" especially in a formula discussion is so condescending when spoken in that context and makes me want to throat punch everyone. I got into a huge argument when I was pregnant with my son on my original bb because I pointed that out. There are many reasons why a mum can't breastfeed and even if she could but didn't want to that's none of your/our business. Child rearing is not a democracy and frankly is no one's business unless the child is in danger....
So I guess that's my first UO - I hate all the sancti-mommies who try to force their parenting choices on others. It's OK to have an opinion but know when to share it and know it's just that - your experience /opinion.
My original UO is I HATE some mums obsession with numbers and want to help (re:speed) things up. Unless it's go-time I could give two sh*ts how dilated I am at 36 weeks... it means nothing unless they are coming right now. I've been in prodromal labor for weeks and this storm is doing weird things to my body but guess what??? This sucka is not coming out anytime soon even though I've been dilated / effaced for at least six weeks. Like most others I'm over the negative side effects of pregnancy but I signed up for at least 40 weeks and that's the only number I care about.
@maiatene I've made a compromise with myself. I won't crack and ask to go early but at my 39 week visit I'm allowed to ask about inducing at 40 weeks if he doesn't come before then. I don't think I'm strong enough to tough it out as long as it takes and go 41-42 weeks. Not sure they'd let me either due to advanced maternal age. I've been having wicked painful (but not regular) contractions for a couple of weeks now that are getting stronger and more frequent and it's starting to wear me down, but I just told my husband not five minutes ago that I signed up for 40 weeks and I'll do everything I can to stick out those 40 weeks. But let me tell you, baby boy is welcome and highly encouraged to come on out the moment he feels ready! I am ready!
When I went to L&D yesterday for high BP, the doctor had asked when my last cervical check was. I told him I hadn't had any, that the doctor would offer to do one if I wanted it, but I declined. He said, "Well that's just lazy of them." Um no, not really. If I'm dilated or not isn't an indication of anything so it's not necessary. I understand that different doctors have different opinions on things, but no need to call them lazy. I happen to love the doctors in my office. Glad he was just the doctor doing triage and not one who would be delivering my baby!
@aprosch my doc hasn't done any cervical checks nor has she offered or brought them up in anyway. I'm actually grateful to not being doing anything more than is needed. I don't really see the point in them. If they are reassuring to you in some way then by all means, go for it! But for me it's just, eh, one more thing that doesn't mean any thing other than I'll have a baby sometime between now and 3-5 weeks from now.
@J1D I was glad to have a cervical check yesterday since I was in L&D and having some contractions. Now at least I know where I'm at since I'm 39+4. But I'm glad I didn't have any checks before that. They are very uncomfortable!!!
@J1D asking at 39 weeks about options if you go past 40 weeks is fine IMO because you are preparing for possible scenarios. Every time I stand up I feel like this baby is going to come shooting out bc they dropped so low and when I share that with my ob-gyn she checks and tells me I'm fine for now. Pregnant with my second at 38 has been no picnic and trust me I want to roll over like a normal person but knowing I'm 2cm dilated prior to 37 weeks isn't changing anything and obsessing over that number is an exercise in futility unless its followed by the words "and the baby will be here on 30 minutes" lol
I feel like saying "breast is best" in formula discussions is like saying, eating organic vegetables picked from your own garden is best. Shame on you for feeding your child non-organic frozen/canned vegetables from Food Lion."
I think the majority of moms would breastfeed if they could, though sometimes the amount of effort to do so exclusively might be too much. I've heard very few women say they just don't want to, though that's a valid decision.
Thank you gals for the support. This first week, I've had to tell so many people, drs, nurses, and lactation consultants who came in to the hospital room, we are formula feeding. The lactation consultants were amazing! In fact, the one sat down and said she's just happy the baby is being loved and we knew how we wanted to feed him. My little guy was born with low blood sugar and had trouble maintaining temperature, not bad enough to go to the NICU but bad enough we stayed another night in the hospital to ensure he was going to be ok. Our pediatrician yesterday said it best, we don't care if you breastfeed or bottle feed, we know you made a very educated choice, we care that he will be well cared for.
Re: UO Thursday 10/1
So I guess that's my first UO - I hate all the sancti-mommies who try to force their parenting choices on others. It's OK to have an opinion but know when to share it and know it's just that - your experience /opinion.
My original UO is I HATE some mums obsession with numbers and want to help (re:speed) things up. Unless it's go-time I could give two sh*ts how dilated I am at 36 weeks... it means nothing unless they are coming right now. I've been in prodromal labor for weeks and this storm is doing weird things to my body but guess what??? This sucka is not coming out anytime soon even though I've been dilated / effaced for at least six weeks. Like most others I'm over the negative side effects of pregnancy but I signed up for at least 40 weeks and that's the only number I care about.
I think the majority of moms would breastfeed if they could, though sometimes the amount of effort to do so exclusively might be too much. I've heard very few women say they just don't want to, though that's a valid decision.