We will use proper wordage here, too. I think it was either KonaCoffeeBean or Frogger5 (I don't want to tag them in case I'm wrong and they get a needless alert) who said they actually lost an abuse case because the child said she was touched on her peepee (or privates, or something...one of those cute-sy names people use for the genitalia) and the family swore up and down to the judge that was the word they used for 'face' in their family. So it will be penis and vagina in this house. But man, I would have really enjoyed watching DH cringe while trying to feel comfortable using the word vagina, lol. In this the parents of boys have it easier, I think. Men and boys don't mind talking about a penis and balls, and women can talk about penis and balls matter of factly, but only women seem to feel comfortable using the word vagina.
Also, @virginiaunicorn11 - I try on opinions here, too. Tho I didn't know what to call it, very appropriate! I float how I'm feeling about something and read how everybody feels about it, then come back and digest that info. Helps me to have a well rounded, well thought out opinion / point of view.
Everybody here helps me to make informed decisions - love my June moms! You guys make me a better person
As an aside, when I was at the drs office Thursday I was waiting in the exam room and surfing June moms and my Dr comes in and asks how I'm doing, etc. She starts to talk about how I may feel after the visit, and I'm nodding and say 'I spoke with the June moms about it, helped me to be prepared' and she smiles and asks "how are the June moms? Everybody doing OK in baby land?" Even my OB thinks June moms are awesome, and she hasn't even been here.
I've never thought about proper verbiage in terms of abuse. That's an incredible point. When DD gets to speaking age, we will say vagina. For now it's a ha-poo-ka-coo. My MIL thinks it's hilariously weird, but it's the same thing my mom used for me when I was a baby. It's funny how certain "traditions" stay with you.
My problem with "vagina" is that a lot of people use it like "ear" when it's more of an "ear canal" so to speak. Like, above, I wasn't talking about cleaning her vagina, but between her labia. Vulva is the word I want, I guess, for all the external stuff.
@mellymar I remember someone posted that, too. I plan to use the proper terminology as well. My sister keeps referring to them as tiddly bits and it cracks me up, but I'm set on using the proper terms
As to the stomach sleeping. LO has now officially learned to go back to belly as of yesterday and has decided to sleeping on his stomach is pretty swell. I turned him once and he rolled again and is sleeping really well so won't be messing with that! He's 17 weeks today so no worries mammas with younger babies!
We will use proper wordage here, too. I think it was either KonaCoffeeBean or Frogger5 (I don't want to tag them in case I'm wrong and they get a needless alert) who said they actually lost an abuse case because the child said she was touched on her peepee (or privates, or something...one of those cute-sy names people use for the genitalia) and the family swore up and down to the judge that was the word they used for 'face' in their family. So it will be penis and vagina in this house.
But man, I would have really enjoyed watching DH cringe while trying to feel comfortable using the word vagina, lol. In this the parents of boys have it easier, I think. Men and boys don't mind talking about a penis and balls, and women can talk about penis and balls matter of factly, but only women seem to feel comfortable using the word vagina.
Yep, it was a case I had about three years ago. Absolutely awful.
lo has been sleeping on her stomach for the past few weeks even before she could roll from stomach to back. As a mom you wake when your babys begins to stir so for the first few nights Id look at her while hearing her move just to make sure she was ok. But this way we don't have to swaddle or do anything with crazy sleep suits. Just a sleeper to bed. Now that she's in her pack n play and can roll we feel 100% safe and not worried about her at all. And she also sleeps with a blanket We like to break all the rules. The blanket is breathable but she's never put it by her face. If anything she kicks it off herself down at the end of her pack n play
@katyertl Curious what blanket your lo is sleeping with that's breathable? I've been swaddling my lo recently but for a few weeks before we went back to it. She would hold a little blanky while napping. I could watch her on the monitor so was fine with it, but would take it away at night when I went to bed. Now with her back in the swaddle she can't hold one but I let her have it on the side of her face if I'm up.
@katyertl Curious what blanket your lo is sleeping with that's breathable? I've been swaddling my lo recently but for a few weeks before we went back to it. She would hold a little blanky while napping. I could watch her on the monitor so was fine with it, but would take it away at night when I went to bed. Now with her back in the swaddle she can't hold one but I let her have it on the side of her face if I'm up.
It's one that my sister in law got at a craft fair. She has one for her kids too. It's pretty awesome but since she got it there I haven't seen any sold retail like ours unfortunately
A good friend just had a baby about two weeks ago. I sent her a "you don't have to respond, but I just want you to know that it's ok if amid the wonderful bits, there are some really crappy bits. Which in my case were X, Y, and Z." Because another friend of ours did that and it practically saved my (and DH's) life.
Homegirl writes back glitter farts about how amazing and beautiful everything is.
I am so happy for her! For real. And also kind of want to stab her...
@virginiaunicorn11 she may be in denial or so sleep deprived that she doesn't know the difference. I had a good friend who kept telling me how perfect her lo was. When I saw her at 4 weeks she looked awful and admitted that even though her baby slept well during the day but was up between midnight and 6 with colic. So the baby was definitely not perfect.
^^^ well, and with all seriousness - at 3 weeks PP I felt pretty damned good about myself and being a mom. I was tired, yeah, and stressed, but still feeling emotionally like a champ. It was somewhere between then and 6 weeks that my mood took a serious nosedive. Hopefully your friend will continue to be in the happy camp as time progresses @virginiaunicorn11 (not saying I want her to be unhappy, just that I really do hope she remains feeling like she's on cloud 9. That swing downward sucked)
^^Oo, interesting . My first 11 days were total hell. Day 14 started my upswing, though nothing super great til 6 weeks. How can I keep forgetting we and our babies are all so different?!
There are 5 of us at work with new babies. The oldest is about 20 weeks and the youngest is 2 weeks. We were bonding over our tiredness when another parent started complaining about how often her 1 year old wakes up. It was like she was trying to out do everyone else on the tiredness scale. One of the other parents just walked away from her and the rest of us followed suit.
I have no sympathy for a 1 year old who wakes up 3 times a night. At that point, you have encouraged bad habits and it's your own damn fault. If you want to be a martyr, fine. But don't come looking for sympathy from parents of newborns.
Haha me either! I have to check this app to know. Thank god I have it. If it were 10 years ago I'd just be making weeks up when someone asked. Although I just say 3 months when asked anyway.
ETA: @Sammy K my friend and I have babies a week apart. We are constantly eye rolling at each other when our friends with no kids are complaining about being tired. I feel so bad if I ever bitched to a new mom about being tired.
Haha me either! I have to check this app to know. Thank god I have it. If it were 10 years ago I'd just be making weeks up when someone asked. Although I just say 3 months when asked anyway.
lol, I was just about to say, "Well don't use this app!" It says my LO is 3 months and two weeks...but he's 4 months on Tuesday so I don't know where those other two weeks are gonna happen. (Lord knows I didn't sleep through them!!)
I don't read to LO. Not because I don't want to, but she HATES it. Last night DH put her down and he read Olivia because he didn't believe she could possibly hate being read to. She screamed the whole time, stopped as soon as he closed the book. How does a baby not enjoy being read to? Especially in a family that loves books!
I must confess: I say that I wish breastfeeding worked out for us... But I don't think I mean it! Formula is so easy! (No flaming, right?) I think I keep saying it because it's what I'm SUPPOSED to say.
I must confess: I say that I wish breastfeeding worked out for us... But I don't think I mean it! Formula is so easy! (No flaming, right?) I think I keep saying it because it's what I'm SUPPOSED to say.
It IS easy. I'm glad that I can go out places with LO and not have to worry if he gets cranky and wants to eat, I can feed him no problem. If I were bfing I would feed him then, too, but this way its 'socially acceptable'. I can leave the house and do stuff, leaving LO with DH. I still offer him bf time, but I also wonder often why I keep bothering. The decision may be taken away from me here shortly... it seems like they are drying up, and I'm not sure that I care.
I produce so much milk and secretly, I sort of wish they'd dry up at this point. I know I'd probably be sad that I couldn't nurse, but I'd get over it in 2 seconds. Formula does seem so much easier, and honestly, as much as I love LO, I'm ready for my body to be totally mine again.
ETA: @virginiaunicorn11 I should probably check my app. I'm probably telling people all wrong because I trusted it. Haha.
The pediatrician put silver nitrate on my LOs belly button to dry up some oozy stuff and it permanently turned part of it a light maroon color. I'm worried he'll be self conscious about that when he's older. I'm probably thinking too much into it but it bothers me everytime I change his diaper...like was silver nitrate really necessary?
@mjschenk my sister actually offered to buy us the new fancy breathable mattresses........ I've considered it...
I also cannot wait to be done pumping/breastfeeding but for me it helps me burn calories (so shallow)...... And I know it's the breastfeeding because I've never lost weight in my life. I'm a gainer not a loser ...... So. I'm terrified at the same time to quit in case I just start packing on the pounds....
@klkonwi I feel like bf/ pumping has had the opposite effect. I figured I would lose more weight than I did. But I have gone from a 32 a to 34 d so that accounts for some weight. Also not trying to sound braggy but every time I pump I get at least 2/3 lb of milk and on several occasions a lb of milk if I waited too long.( A lb of milk in your boobs hurts like hell.)
@mjschenk my sister actually offered to buy us the new fancy breathable mattresses........ I've considered it...
I also cannot wait to be done pumping/breastfeeding but for me it helps me burn calories (so shallow)...... And I know it's the breastfeeding because I've never lost weight in my life. I'm a gainer not a loser ...... So. I'm terrified at the same time to quit in case I just start packing on the pounds....
No judgement here because I feel the exact same way. I dropped weight so quickly initially, and I know it was the breastfeeding. I also feel like I continue to have an excuse to eat whatever I want because I'm breastfeeding.
I also cannot wait to be done pumping/breastfeeding but for me it helps me burn calories (so shallow)...... And I know it's the breastfeeding because I've never lost weight in my life. I'm a gainer not a loser ...... So. I'm terrified at the same time to quit in case I just start packing on the pounds....
Ditto. I've been eating pretty much unrestricted for a year now, since I got pregnant, and I'm dreading having to change these habits when I stop.
Me-37, DH-38
Married in 2006, TTC #1 since Jan 2012
Baby Boy born June 1, 2015
He settles her in her home as a happy mother of children, praise the Lord! (Psalms 113:9)
And the peace of God, which surpasses all understand, will guard your heart and mind in Jesus Christ (Philippians 4:7)
I also cannot wait to be done pumping/breastfeeding but for me it helps me burn calories (so shallow)...... And I know it's the breastfeeding because I've never lost weight in my life. I'm a gainer not a loser ...... So. I'm terrified at the same time to quit in case I just start packing on the pounds....
Ditto. I've been eating pretty much unrestricted for a year now, since I got pregnant, and I'm dreading having to change these habits when I stop.
Or if you are like me, you don't, and just go shopping for bigger pants
I just made an apple pie tonight because ... That's what you do in New England... And DH and I will eat it all in 2 days because it can be both breakfast and dessert!
I also cannot wait to be done pumping/breastfeeding but for me it helps me burn calories (so shallow)...... And I know it's the breastfeeding because I've never lost weight in my life. I'm a gainer not a loser ...... So. I'm terrified at the same time to quit in case I just start packing on the pounds....
Ditto. I've been eating pretty much unrestricted for a year now, since I got pregnant, and I'm dreading having to change these habits when I stop.
Or if you are like me, you don't, and just go shopping for bigger pants
I just made an apple pie tonight because ... That's what you do in New England... And DH and I will eat it all in 2 days because it can be both breakfast and dessert!
@hoodoll82 this just cracked me up. I'm team bigger pants too!
Yes to a pie in two days! Yes to both breakfast and dessert!
DH's family all have a huge sweet tooth (sweet teeth?). My family doesn't eat sweets as often, but when we do, we go hard. For example, it wasn't until I met DH and he teased me mercilessly that I learned a pint of ice cream is not a one sitting single serving (though I'm still pretty sure it is). MIL can make a pint last two weeks, but she will have a bite or two after every meal. Whereas I will have a whole pint all to myself every so often (a few times a year, before I was shamed out of it). They shame me for the size of my bowl of ice cream when we get together, even though I'm just making up for lost time.
^^^ dude. When you eat ice cream, you EAT ice cream. Who takes 2 bites of ice cream? [-( Nobody (excpet your MIL, apparently). I'm in the ginormous bowl of ice cream camp. Hell yeah
Re: FFFC!
But man, I would have really enjoyed watching DH cringe while trying to feel comfortable using the word vagina, lol. In this the parents of boys have it easier, I think. Men and boys don't mind talking about a penis and balls, and women can talk about penis and balls matter of factly, but only women seem to feel comfortable using the word vagina.
Everybody here helps me to make informed decisions - love my June moms! You guys make me a better person
As an aside, when I was at the drs office Thursday I was waiting in the exam room and surfing June moms and my Dr comes in and asks how I'm doing, etc. She starts to talk about how I may feel after the visit, and I'm nodding and say 'I spoke with the June moms about it, helped me to be prepared' and she smiles and asks "how are the June moms? Everybody doing OK in baby land?" Even my OB thinks June moms are awesome, and she hasn't even been here.
My problem with "vagina" is that a lot of people use it like "ear" when it's more of an "ear canal" so to speak. Like, above, I wasn't talking about cleaning her vagina, but between her labia. Vulva is the word I want, I guess, for all the external stuff.
ETA: my boys just think I have two butts.
Yep, it was a case I had about three years ago. Absolutely awful.
2nd round exp 8/20/18.
We like to break all the rules. The blanket is breathable but she's never put it by her face. If anything she kicks it off herself down at the end of her pack n play
A good friend just had a baby about two weeks ago. I sent her a "you don't have to respond, but I just want you to know that it's ok if amid the wonderful bits, there are some really crappy bits. Which in my case were X, Y, and Z." Because another friend of ours did that and it practically saved my (and DH's) life.
Homegirl writes back glitter farts about how amazing and beautiful everything is.
I am so happy for her! For real. And also kind of want to stab her...
And I don't want that, really. (Right, Self? RIGHT?!??) Just a crappy friend (me, not her) moment of feeling inadequate.
I found this tonight, which also really helped: https://www.pregnantchicken.com/pregnant-chicken-blog/to-my-pregnant-sister-because-i-scared-the-shit-out-of-her
I have no sympathy for a 1 year old who wakes up 3 times a night. At that point, you have encouraged bad habits and it's your own damn fault. If you want to be a martyr, fine. But don't come looking for sympathy from parents of newborns.
ETA: @Sammy K my friend and I have babies a week apart. We are constantly eye rolling at each other when our friends with no kids are complaining about being tired. I feel so bad if I ever bitched to a new mom about being tired.
It IS easy. I'm glad that I can go out places with LO and not have to worry if he gets cranky and wants to eat, I can feed him no problem. If I were bfing I would feed him then, too, but this way its 'socially acceptable'. I can leave the house and do stuff, leaving LO with DH. I still offer him bf time, but I also wonder often why I keep bothering. The decision may be taken away from me here shortly... it seems like they are drying up, and I'm not sure that I care.
ETA: @virginiaunicorn11 I should probably check my app. I'm probably telling people all wrong because I trusted it. Haha.
@mjschenk my sister actually offered to buy us the new fancy breathable mattresses........ I've considered it...
I also cannot wait to be done pumping/breastfeeding but for me it helps me burn calories (so shallow)...... And I know it's the breastfeeding because I've never lost weight in my life. I'm a gainer not a loser ...... So. I'm terrified at the same time to quit in case I just start packing on the pounds....
I just made an apple pie tonight because ... That's what you do in New England... And DH and I will eat it all in 2 days because it can be both breakfast and dessert!
DH's family all have a huge sweet tooth (sweet teeth?). My family doesn't eat sweets as often, but when we do, we go hard. For example, it wasn't until I met DH and he teased me mercilessly that I learned a pint of ice cream is not a one sitting single serving (though I'm still pretty sure it is).
MIL can make a pint last two weeks, but she will have a bite or two after every meal. Whereas I will have a whole pint all to myself every so often (a few times a year, before I was shamed out of it). They shame me for the size of my bowl of ice cream when we get together, even though I'm just making up for lost time.