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Ready or not I'm back (warning: loss mentioned)

Teenie16Teenie16 member
in TTC after 35
Hello ladies 
I was on this board while TTC the last time around. I recognize some familiar names but there are a lot of new ones. I look forward to getting to know those who weren't here back in March. 

Long story short:
Both my BF and I are 41. We were TTC for 15 months before we got our BFP. We were so excited to be expecting a little boy. At my 20 wk anatomy scan we found out he was measuring only 17wks and I had low amniotic fluid. The told us to come back in 2 weeks, which is when we found out he no longer had a heartbeat. I had to wait to be admitted to the hospital and delivered him 4 days later. Copper was born 7/25/15. 
My OB told us we could start trying again right away, My acupuncturist told me to wait 2 cycles, My BF want's to start again asap... AF showed up 1 month to the day after and here we are trying again. Not sure if I'm emotionally ready, I know time is not on our side, so I have to be ready. 

I look forward to both giving and getting support from all you lovely ladies this time around.
(Sorry it wasn't as short as I had intended)
****Loss Mentioned***
Me: 41 Him: 41
TTC since December 2013
HSG 9/18/14 = Tubes open but T shaped uterus
IUI #1... 1/6/2015 + 50mg Clomid = BFN
IUI #2... 1/29 & 30/2015 + 50mg Clomid +Tigger +Progesterone = BFN
3/14 BFFP! Natural w/acupuncture & herbs only
EDD = 11/22/15;  No heartbeat = 7/21/15
Cooper Midnight Johnson born sleeping 7/25/2015



Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
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Re: Ready or not I'm back (warning: loss mentioned)

  • carrieandrcarrieandr member
    Oh @Teenie16 - I remember you, and I'm so sorry this happened.  I think you had already gotten your BFP when I joined the board, but I saw your grad posts.  I wish I had uplifting words for you.  I had my second loss this weekend -- just a chemical this time -- and I'm having trouble being hopeful right now, let alone giving hope.  But I'm here for you regardless.  We're all on this roller coaster together.
    TTC#1 since Jan 2015
    BFP 2/19/15  •  MMC found at 9 wks  •  D&E at 11 wks (age 36)
    BFP 8/29/15      •  CP (age 37)
    BFP 11/18/15  •  DD born at 41 weeks <3(age 37/38)

    TTC#2 since May 2017
    BFP 10/18/17  •  MMC found at 8 wks  •  Misoprostal at 10.5 wks (age 39)
    BFP 2/16/18      •  CP (age 39)
    BFP 4/13/18      •  CP (age 39)
    BFP 5/07/18  •  MMC found at 10.5 wks  •  D&E at 11.5 wks      •  Testing showed it was a girl with Trisomy 22. (age 39/40)
    9/5/18 Diagnosed with diminished ovarian reserve (4-5 follicles, one ovary had none and was very atrophied)
    RE says the low egg count is likely causing my recurrent pregnancy loss. Less eggs results in more aneuploidy.
    BFP 9/24/18  •      CP (age 40)
    BFP 5/11/19  •  Fraternal twins  •  MMC found at 10w5d (Baby A 6w, Baby B 10w)  •  Misoprostal at 11 weeks (age 41)













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  • dolphin012dolphin012 member
    edited September 2015
    @Teenie16 -  You seem very strong and wishing you all the best as you start ttc again. Here for you as you continue this journey.

    I love your baby boys name -- very sweet 


    Me (42) w/ partner for 16+ years
    TTC #1: 11/2012 - 9/2013; 6/2014 - present
    Follistim + TI (3x): All BFNs
    Follistim + IUI (1x): BFN 
    IVF #1: 17 retrieved,15 fertilized, Day 3: 15, Day 5/6: 3 biopsied
    Result; 1 frozen blast (inconclusive PGS results)
    IVF #2; ER: 6/22 16 retrieved, 6/25: 5 transferred (CP), 2 frozen
    FET 9/17: BFN
    Current FET -- Transferred 2 day-3 embryos - BFN

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  • thistle8677thistle8677 member
    I'm so very sorry for your loss @Teenie16...
    I remember you too.
    >:D<
    There are no words to describe the heartache associated with a recent loss. With all you just went through I'm sure you are grieving immensely.
    I can completely understand being eager to ttc again.

    Sending you lots of love and best wishes with ttc whenever you are ready xoxoxo
    Lilypie Pregnancy tickers
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  • C_GirlieC_Girlie member
    @Teenie16 I also remember you ((((hugs)))). So sorry for all that you and your DH has been through. Usually once your halfway there you feel a little more confident but things aren't as clear cut sometimes. Wishing you to continue to feel better its bittersweet, but welcome back
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  • jilligan14jilligan14 member
    @Teenie16 - I remember you as well. I'm so sorry for your loss. It must be so hard to move on from such an experience. We're here for you during this crazy process.
    ME: 36 (PCOS), DH: excellent SA
    NTNP since 11/12, actively trying since 8/14
    m/c @ 7w (4/22/14), m/c @ 6w (11/19/14)
    11/15: Letrozole, Ovidrel, TI = BFP!!!
    Beta #1(14dpo)=349, Beta #2(18dpo)=2,805
    12/17/15: Got to see the heartbeat (105bpm)!
    1/25/16: NT scan = normal (HB=163bpm)
    EDD: 8/10/16 
    8/8/16: Baby boy born @ 12:25am, 8lbs, 20.5 inches
    5/18/17: BFP!!! (11dpo)
    Beta #1(12dpo)=176.4, Beta #2(15dpo)=607.1
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  • happyktmomhappyktmom member
    I think of you and your sweet baby boy all the time.  When you lost your boy, a close friend had also lost hers. I cannot imagine that pain and then the strength to try again.  You are so awesome to be back and trying.  We are here for unconditional support.  I can't wait to see what your future holds!!
    **child mentioned**
    Me(38)PCOS/Hypothyroid   DH(43)Low T/ED
    MMC at 10 weeks 03/2011 DD born 01/2012   TTC #2 since 04/2014
    BFP 8/26/2016


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  • daisy62103daisy62103 member
    I'm so very sorry for your loss. Wishing you the best! *hugs*
    DD 6/2007
    DS 4/2009
    m/c 11/12/2010 ~ 7 wks
    m/c 7/4/2012 ~ 6 wks
    DD 12/2013
    mmc Baby Girl 7/12/2015 ~ 14 weeks  <3
    Twin girls! 8/26/2017


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  • Whiggrrl65Whiggrrl65 member
    I am so sorry to read about your loss. We are all here for you on your journey. Sending you positive energy through the Internet.
      • TTC #1 since August 2014
      • currently on 5th medicated IUI cycle
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  • emsmama15emsmama15 member
    I'm so sorry @Teenie16.  I remember when you got your natural BFP and I was SO VERY HAPPY for you.  I'm just heartbroken that this has happened.  We're here for you!!
    *** Child & current pregnancy mentioned ***
    Me - 41 (PCOS), Hubby - 43 (healthy)
    7/2013 - Sweet baby girl born (Clomid + TI)
    3/2014 - TTC #2, return to RE 7/2014
    12/2015: IVF #1 transferred two great looking embryos - BFP!
    First ultrasound: TWO beautiful little heartbeats!!
    Harmony: negative; level 2: babies look great and are boy/girl! :) 
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  • Teenie16Teenie16 member
    edited September 2015
    This board is filled with such wonderful and supportive women! Thank you ladies so much for your kind words.
    We are all on the same journey but we each have different routes and obstacles along the way. 
    I hope I can support you all as I know you will do for me. 

    @CarrieandRoy - Thanks.  
    >:D<

    @CarrieandRoy, @Sinnet, @Jilligan14 I am sorry for all of your losses as well. 

    Edited to finish a thought
    ****Loss Mentioned***
    Me: 41 Him: 41
    TTC since December 2013
    HSG 9/18/14 = Tubes open but T shaped uterus
    IUI #1... 1/6/2015 + 50mg Clomid = BFN
    IUI #2... 1/29 & 30/2015 + 50mg Clomid +Tigger +Progesterone = BFN
    3/14 BFFP! Natural w/acupuncture & herbs only
    EDD = 11/22/15;  No heartbeat = 7/21/15
    Cooper Midnight Johnson born sleeping 7/25/2015



    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
    Report Reply
  • BulgariHeartBulgariHeart member
    I'm so sorry for your loss. I've been here a handful of months so I don't remember you but happy to be meeting you nonetheless. Sending you strength. I'm so sorry :(
    Anniversary
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  • MntnGirlMntnGirl member
    I'm so sorry, @Teenie16. Thank you for sharing your story with us. My DH and I are the same age as you and your BF and we feel that added pressure too.
    Report Reply
  • TomerineTomerine member
    I am so very sorry for your loss.  I'm sorry for all you've gone through, but know you will find good support back here again.  Best of luck to you.
    Report Reply
  • ladeuce13ladeuce13 member
    I've only been here a few months, so I wasn't here when you were . . . so sorry for your loss and everything you've been through. Wishing you all the best as you start this next leg of your journey with us.
    Me: 37, DH: 44
    TTC #1 since September 2014
    Canada




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  • kellymarie8408kellymarie8408 member
    So sorry for your loss @Teenie16 . I'm new to the boards and look forward to getting to know you! Best of luck ❤️
    Me: 36 DH: 42
    San Diego, CA

    TTC #1 since June 2015

    Prior D&C due to blighted ovum 2003



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