Time to try again

jacobsone2

I had a miscarriage in June. My doctor said to wait 3 months before trying again. Three months felt so far away and now that it's here I'm terrified. This was my 2nd miscarriage and I'm scared it's going to happen again. I have had bloodwork and an hsg, both came back ok. I want to feel excited, but I can't get over the fear of going through another mc. How do you get over that?

PlainJane8350

In my experience...you don't. I'm currently 37 weeks and still worry! Testing helped the most, though. My husband and I didn't have trouble conceiving, but we saw a fertility specialist for testing. I just couldn't accept that, even though I know now that it's true, that miscarriage is common. It may be common, but when it happens to you it changes your life. They tested my husband's sperm and did both a physical exam and blood tests on me. We also tested our baby using Natera's Anora test and found out that we lost (what turned out to be) him due to trisomy 13. Most early losses are due to chromosomal abnormalities like that and are no more likely to happen to you again than anyone else.

I saw the fertility specialist for the first trimester and they checked my hcg and progesterone the first week, which helped give me peace of mind, and as soon as we "graduated" to a high risk specialist we did Materna Plus. Doing that helped the most once I was pregnant again, because if we did have a scare (and we did), then we'd fall back on those results while we waited.

I also got way more visits/ultrasounds with both the fertility specialist and my current high risk doctor. I also recommend being honest about your terror and not trying to be though. If you're not just worried, but freaking yourself out, then find someone at the office that you feel comfortable talking to. If you're at home and you get really scared, then don't be afraid to call your doctor's office. We all worry and I can tell you all of the crazy things I've done not to "jinx" this pregnancy. Miscarriages are more traumatic than I think even most of us realize, it's O.K. to ask to go into the office for a quick baby check if that's what you need to make it from one appointment to the next for a while.

mommaseal

@jacobsone2 I'm so sorry for your loss. I had a miscarriage in June as well. I'm very early in my current pregnancy and I can't help but be anxious and nervous as well. It's just part of us now. At least we are not alone in this and we have support from others- like this group.