Here and terrified

cammlyn

Hey yall! I just moved over from the TTC group. I got a faint BFP yesterday and a digital pregnant test this morning I am already feeling myself panic some time more than others. I am going to be telling my husband tonight. But in the back of my mind I want to keep it to myself because if something happens again I don't want him to hurt all over. (I know he would be more hurt by me not telling him). I am so excited to be pregnant again but I am so scared. I just want to say thanks again for all the hope and support you guys give. Just reading post really does help to know I'm not alone.

rachrobertson

Welcome and congrats on your BFP!

Plleriti1

Welvo

Plleriti1

Wow- that didn't work right! Lol. Welcome and congrats! The anxiety is definitely a common thing amongst us. Wishing you some relief from the worry and a happy and healthy 9 months!

cammlyn

Thanks so much. At least I know the anxiety is normal so that helps

bntfroggie

Totally normal!!!  Congratulations and a happy and healthy 9 months.

PlainJane8350

Welcome and congratulations! I'm sure we all have at least some level of PTSD so anxiety is normal. If you ever want to feel better, then message me! Everyone tells me how paranoid I am, so you'll probably feel perfectly calm next too me.

cammlyn

@PlainJane8350 thanks and you may not want to offer cause I will totally hit you up. I feel like I am going to be a basket case this pregnancy. So maybe I will make you feel calm haha

borgahurst

Congrats and welcome!! And don't worry about worrying around here! That's what we all came here to do - find comfort in knowin we are not alone!

PlainJane8350

I've spent a lot of my pregnancy on couch potato rest, so I'm all yours.

Plainjane19792001@gmail.com

One thing that has helped me is e-mailing back and forth with one of my friends from college. She hasn't had a loss, but it's still nice to have someone to talk to.

carrieandr

You're definitely not alone. Thank goodness for this board. I don't feel confident enough to join the May '16 board yet, and I don't belong on the TTC After 35 board anymore. (Although I'm still checking on the girls.) I'm glad there's a place where we can worry and wonder if this is going to be for real this time.

wrapandgonails

I am totally with you on this one! I am such a basket case this time around and feel so anxious...

cammlyn

I did buy myself well the baby a small gift today. Just to allow myself to believe that this is real and he/she will stay put for another 35 weeks

PlainJane8350

What'd you get?!

cammlyn

Just a small cosleeper bed that I probably won't even use but I needed some positive thoughts lol I am still terrified every time I go to the bathroom that there is going to be blood (sorry tmi)

PlainJane8350

We just bought one of those! We were planning on using my husband's old bassinet, but took a breastfeeding class and the instructor told us that if you plan on trying to breastfeed, then she recommends a co-sleeper so good buy! I was on T.P. patrol and, not to give you any ideas, I went as far as stopped wearing black panties (because blood wouldn't show up as well on black and I wanted to know if I was bleeding). It's all totally normal considering, just stick to telling people like us and not those who haven't experienced a loss. Every time someone told me to relax and enjoy my pregnancy I wanted to punch them in the throat. O:-)

kimey1

PlainJane8350 said:

I was on T.P. patrol and, not to give you any ideas, I went as far as stopped wearing black panties (because blood wouldn't show up as well on black and I wanted to know if I was bleeding).

@PlainJane8350 i might pick up a bunch of black undies myself. Light underwear makes all those frequent bathroom trips nerve wracking!

cammlyn

@PlainJane8350 I wear lightweight liners lol everyday. All day.

PlainJane8350

See?! We all do it! I would say that we should start a club...but I think that's what this is! This app only works for me half of the time, but if any of you ever want to talk please e-mail me:

Plainjane19792001@gmail.com

I'm 37 weeks today and I still worry! Granted the things that I worry about have changed a bit, but I still worry about her not moving. Yesterday we went to get our flu shots and I hadn't felt her move. My husband turned off the car to go into Walgreens and I was like, "I want to feel her move first." He started rubbing on my tummy, talking to her and she moved a bit. I almost cried. I was like, "Let me get it together or they'll think I'm scared to get a shot!" My doctor consoled me once when I was apologizing for being so crazy and told me that women who have miscarriages just know how precious life is.