New to "The Bump"....

prettysmile40

I also thought I would take a minute to introduce myself. I am older (42) and hubby is 41.We got married last June and started TTC right away. Neither of us have other kids. I know the odds are stacked against us but I am finding there are a lot of negative nellies regarding age and pregnancy. Any positive stories? We used an OPK for the first time last month and although my mind might be playing tricks on me I feel like I might be "with child." I am bloated, REALLY tired, dizzy and have heartburn. However, I know my AF could show  up tomorrow or the next day too. I plan to test tomorrow AM because i want to surprise my DH and do it when he isn't home. 

RachelT1234

No positive stories to share, but FX for you and welcome! Are you temping along with using OPKs?

lovearoo

Well I didn't feel pregnant until I was like 6-8 weeks along.... If you are pregnant it will show up on the test. If not then it's AF/pms coming on
You should join the Trying to get pregnant group! This group is mostly for those that aren't trying yet. Though you are still welcome!
However I highly suggest lurking before posting in that group so you get a feel for it

lovearoo

Oh! And also, from what I understand generally it's recommended to go see a RE once you are over age 35 and have been trying unsuccessfully for 6 months. Rachel is also onto something, are you temping? Without it you could be entirely missing your ovulation!

prettysmile40

I tested this morning and got a BFN so it must be my dumb AF coming on. We used an OPK last month so I feel that I have a pretty good idea of when I ovulated (or around when I ovulated). We haven't yet been trying for 6 months so I am not making an appointment yet. I am honestly wondering if I should go that far or if I should just say it isn't in the cards if it hasn't happened in that amount of time. I will check out the other thread. Thanks! 

RachelT1234

There's no way of confirming ovulation using OPKs alone without temping. Definitely recommend looking into the temping process. There are some great resources that are recommended that speak to the TTC process including a book called Taking Charge of your Fertility, and an app called fertility friend

prettysmile40

I don't get the temping thing because it has already happened once your temp increase. I have TCOYF and have read some of it. It is a good read! 

RachelT1234

Temping is not necessarily to time when your fertile window is, but to confirm that you've actually ovulated and it can provide insight as to how long each phase is of your cycle, and when to expect AF. You can have a positive OPK but in actuality not ovulate. For me it takes out a lot of the stress of wondering whether I am ovulating, whether it's worth testing depending on whether my temps stay high or dip down at the end of a cycle, etc.

MPeplin

Here's a positive story!  My mother was 41 when she gave birth to my little sister.  My sister came out plump, pink, and kicking - really healthy from day one. This may sound corny, but she was the greatest gift I ever received. I am SO GLAD that my parents didn't let fear or "negative nellies" prevent them from having a baby when my mom was 41. 

My sister WAS planned, by the way.  My mom took fertility drugs to help with conception. So this was not a case of accepting an unplanned pregnancy, but rather of being positive and seeking out a very wanted baby.

Furthermore, there is some evidence that shows that babies born to older mothers have a higher IQ.  When my sister graduated in the "Top Ten" of her high school class, my mom laughed and said, "I had you when I was 41.  You're welcome."  

Xstatic3333

Welcome! I've also noticed that there are TTC 35+ and Pregnant 35+ boards you can check out (though feel free to stick around here as well!) Best of luck with your journey. I do know several woman that had children in their early-40s, though I don't know the details of the steps they took.

lovearoo

RachelT1234 said:

Temping is not necessarily to time when your fertile window is, but to confirm that you've actually ovulated and it can provide insight as to how long each phase is of your cycle, and when to expect AF. You can have a positive OPK but in actuality not ovulate. For me it takes out a lot of the stress of wondering whether I am ovulating, whether it's worth testing depending on whether my temps stay high or dip down at the end of a cycle, etc.

This exactly! Plus you also know exactly when to test also Then if your test is negative you know to try again next cycle.

MrsRo731

Hi and welcome - good luck to you!

J&B0602

Welcome and Good Luck!

My aunt had my youngest cousin when she was 40. That's the only one I can think of off the top of my head.
:-h

FlightyAquarius

I have two positive stories for you! 

My grandma had my aunt at 40, and my mom at 42. They were babies number 7 and 8, but there was a 10 year age gap. Both my Aunt and my Mom were heathy, and they both talk about seeing a unique side of my grandparents. 

My mom then had my sisters at 35 and 38. I was in middle school/ high school at the time. They were definitely planned, and our family was incomplete without them. 

I think there is something to what MPeplin said. My little sisters are crazy smart, and way more talented than me. 

Best of luck to you! 

jenfarm3

My aunt had my cousin when she was in her early 40's. They already had a DD who was about 10 years old and from my knowledge hadn't really been trying for a second. I believe she got pregnant unexpectedly but ended up miscarrying early on. It surprised them and opened their eyes to the realization that they really did want to try for a second child, so they ended up trying again and got pregnant with my cousin who was born healthy and happy. Don't let the negative nellies get you down. It can happen.