@yodiggity I always tell them which vein to use too. I've only had one genius ignore me because it's not on my dominant side (those veins are usually bigger and easier to stick), so she blew right through it. So annoying.
I realized this morning why I'm so upset about DH's vasectomy comment.
We lost two pregnancies before concieving DS. Those two losses were hard on me, and I still mourn the deaths of the two children that I will never meet.
When I was about 12 months PP with DS I debated talking to DH about being one and done, because I was so terrified of losing multiple pregnancies in order for us to have a healthy child.
Then I got pregnant with a surprise. One that had the odds against him because of how late I ovulated. I mentally prepared myself to miscarry... I spent two months in fear... But he beat the odds and stuck.
After we found out that this would be our second boy, DH convinced me that trying again when LO was older would be worth it--even if we did have to suffer another loss. HE convinced ME that our family wasn't complete just yet, and I took it to heart. For the past four months, I've imagined that I'll have a family of five in the end...
And then he just shatters the image that he's painted in my mind with the mere suggestion of a vasectomy.
Why would you do that to a pregnant woman who's overly emotional? To the woman you convinced that any future loss would be worth it because we would end up with a sweet little bundle of joy?
I know he didn't make the suggestion to hurt me. He probably even forgot that he was the one who convinced me into having three kids. It just... Hurt. Especially with the timing.
The end of this month marks three years since we lost our first baby. Our second would be turning two years old next month if I had not miscarried.
I love DS. I wouldn't trade him for either one of my other children. I know a lot of other moms on here have had losses and moved on so quickly and easily, but I never have. I know that it's ok to be sad over them, just like it's ok to not be sad over a miscarriage. Everyone sees a miscarriage under a different light... DH never looked at our losses the way I did. He never held it against me, not I him.
@fbanke42 I got some really good advice from my mom last night when I mentioned that Mike has come down with a new ailment every week for the past month and I know that it's psychological but it's annoying when he complains but I'm in immense discomfort 24/7. What she told me was something along the lines of pregnancy being difficult for men, too (obviously), and that they don't get attention like we do. Everyone knows that by this point, we are fat and in pain and tired, but people don't acknowledge how difficult it can be for dads to adjust. Mike has kids already, but he had to give his ex primary custody because of his career; he has had a lot of trouble with the idea of being a full-time dad and primary caregiver because he's afraid that he'll have one of his moments and lose control around her. The closest he has ever come to losing control is having nightmares, so I find his concern a little over-the-top. It's possible that because of your financial situation, your husband is freaking out about needing to provide for anyone else. Obviously this baby is happening but perhaps his fear stems from this pregnancy being an oops - it could definitely happen again. It sounds like he's over-correcting. I've come to realize that men are sensitive creatures - sometimes even more sensitive than women, because it's not socially acceptable for them to be sensitive around anyone but their wives, so we get the brunt of it. There's a chance that your husband's change of heart is actually coming from a good place, even if it is misguided. It sounds like he's willing to talk about the IUD option, so you already have a good starting point for a calm, sober conversation. Dont let some idiotic blabbering ruin your day. But, if you need to throw in a jab, being a calm and rational pregnant woman in a heated conversation is vindication in itself.
@AmadorRose I told him this morning that we need to sit and talk about this issue while we're sober. I also totally agree with the fact that I think he's just in a panic and is over correcting. He's been having anxiety attacks, but keeps delaying calling a doctor for help, since he's of the opinion that things will go away once we remove stressors from our lives. I was just so mad and upset that he would say something like that at such a bad time... Maybe if he had said it while I was on the upside of the oxycodone, I would have reacted differently. I would have laughed and responded back with "says the man who wants to keep trying for his little girl."
DH and I talked the vasectomy issue out. He admitted that he made the comment out of stress and fear, and if he had been stupid enough to go through with it, he would have completely regretted it, since he does feel like our family won't be complete at four. His main fear is another oops baby, which he agrees the IUD will do a great job of preventing. He apologized for freaking me out and saying something like that while I was already in pain and an emotional state. Both of us are just stressed out and his first thought was "how on earth am I supposed to take care of a third kid if something happens again?"
@AmadorRose I think we do seriously forget how stressful pregnancy is for the SO, since we're so concentrated on growing a human. I know that we've had a lot of non-pregnancy related things to stress about, but DH is also trying to make sure I'm ok, LO is ok, and that DS is ok. He's had to take on so much this pregnancy between my broken finger, my HG, all of my pain, moving, and DS. I've been trying my best to let him have as much "me time" as possible, but that hasn't really been working out very well with moving and all of my pain issues...
I have three written assignments, one quiz, and one discussion response until I'm done with my last class until after I pop this kid out. I want to pay someone to do it for me because I have zero motivation and I just want to clean my house, take baths, nap, and cuddle with my dogs. @RoseShadow873 how are you staying motivated enough to keep getting homework done? Work is easy because I know there, I'll have serious repercussions if I don't bust my ass...but my homework just isn't pressing enough to be important. Ugh.
Does anyone know if you have to drive like a major wimp when you have a baby in the car (especially newborn)? I drive rather aggressively and quickly (not dangerous) so I am the kind of driver that will spill a bag of groceries all over the trunk if I am not trying to be really careful. Are baby necks like really weak? Will it hurt him if I make a quick turn or brake too quickly?
@AmadorRose Honestly I started to feel that way this term too and I did not study as hard as I should have. I had finals this week then a week off and it's back to class. I got stuff done by writing down in my planner what I should get done each day and telling myself that I had to get that stuff done no matter how long it took me (I have been so distracted that reading a scientific article could take 3 hours). So I guess just forcing myself is what I have been doing, and knowing that I feel guilty when I don't get stuff done and that if I let work pile up I will be even more stressed out. Once my new classes start I guess I am going to try to keep a little ahead if possible, so when the birth happens I don't miss something because I procrastinated.
@RoseShadow873 You don't need to drive like a wimp at all. I HIGHLY recommend driving over bumps or pot holes very slowly, just because you may have to deal with crying and screaming from being jerked awake.
So last night I was getting ready for bed and DH was standing behind me talking to me in the mirror (does that make sense?). I was complaining about how huge I felt that day (a non-maternity cami and boyshorts didn't help hide the issue) and he just kind of brushed it off... "you're pregnant". Then I turned to the side to face him and the enormity of my belly shocked him and he was like "WHOA! Very... very... pregnant!" We both laughed... I'm just glad I'm not crazy! She felt so huge last night!
Is anyone familiar with Cleveland? I'm seriously considering moving there but I don't know what it's like.
Never been there myself, but my fiancé said it's dirty. And their sports teams are awful.
He doesn't like the Browns? I think they're cool because they suck, lol! My husband says their basketball team is good but I don't know about all that.
Is anyone familiar with Cleveland? I'm seriously considering moving there but I don't know what it's like.
Never been there myself, but my fiancé said it's dirty. And their sports teams are awful.
He doesn't like the Browns? I think they're cool because they suck, lol! My husband says their basketball team is good but I don't know about all that.
His dad is actually a HUGE Browns fan. I was the one who made the sports comment not him. :P And I was mostly referring to the football and baseball teams (I hate basketball) We are Bills fans so I think it may run in the family to love teams that aren't fabulous football wise. lol
Is anyone familiar with Cleveland? I'm seriously considering moving there but I don't know what it's like.
Never been there myself, but my fiancé said it's dirty. And their sports teams are awful.
He doesn't like the Browns? I think they're cool because they suck, lol! My husband says their basketball team is good but I don't know about all that.
Cleveland is great! But I'm biased since I've lived here my whole life.
Cavs are good again but it's definitely Browns town. Of course, I think the Indians are the best team but I'm a baseball nut.
So I just had my wellness screen for work (yay great timing) and the girl took my bp and it was 114/78....which is my normal. It's been high (hence being monitored yesterday) and I even took it right before I went down with the electric monitor I borrowed from my SIL and it was 147/97. I took it when I got back up and it was 141/95. So either the girl is an idiot and didn't take it correctly or this monitor doesn't work....hmmm...
She also dug through my arm to find a vein even though I told her which one to use....ouch.
Electric cuffs are notoriously inaccurate. Mine was giving me 160/120 readings and the nurse and hospital cuff were 140s/90s. (I know my readings weren't right, but that they possibly meant it was actually at least a little high.) I think @thaisac1 mentioned one time that electronics don't have brains, so to take their information with a grain of salt. Or she was an idiot.
Edited to add: Maybe the lady was an idiot. Not @thaisac1 - Just wanted to clarify.
So I just had my wellness screen for work (yay great timing) and the girl took my bp and it was 114/78....which is my normal. It's been high (hence being monitored yesterday) and I even took it right before I went down with the electric monitor I borrowed from my SIL and it was 147/97. I took it when I got back up and it was 141/95. So either the girl is an idiot and didn't take it correctly or this monitor doesn't work....hmmm...
She also dug through my arm to find a vein even though I told her which one to use....ouch.
Electric cuffs are notoriously inaccurate. Mine was giving me 160/120 readings and the nurse and hospital cuff were 140s/90s. (I know my readings weren't right, but that they possibly meant it was actually at least a little high.) I think @thaisac1 mentioned one time that electronics don't have brains, so to take their information with a grain of salt. Or she was an idiot.
Edited to add: Maybe the lady was an idiot. Not @thaisac1 - Just wanted to clarify.
Today I officially had my last clinic pre-baby! Over the next two weeks I only have 1 more day of echo lab and the other days are all research. Feeling accomplished!
I spent all day yesterday and today working on DHs application for residence permit in Denmark, organizing all the documentation into different categories. We ended up with more than 150 pages of documents, and it took us a couple of hours to print everything and get it sorted. I signed everything and sent the application with the mail with secure tracking so we don't lose it Fingers crossed this is finally it and we can move on with our lives without the constant worry of whether he can stay here or not. It's such a huge burden off my shoulders and I really wanted to get it done before I gave birth.
I am not religious but I will be praying to all the gods that we get the application approved
So DH and I were standing at this street waiting for green light to cross it and I had this pretty old man on his bike standing next to me. DH starts laughing and wouldn't tell me why. When the old man biked away I was like "Awww look how cute he looks with his blue beanie!" where DH replied "yeah he was checking out your ass when we were waiting for the light and when he noticed that I could see him he took off"
So DH and I were standing at this street waiting for green light to cross it and I had this pretty old man on his bike standing next to me. DH starts laughing and wouldn't tell me why. When the old man biked away I was like "Awww look how cute he looks with his blue beanie!" where DH replied "yeah he was checking out your ass when we were waiting for the light and when he noticed that I could see him he took off"
Oh, and watch out. My husband has heartburn and is laying on the couch covering his face like its the worst time of his life. If you see me on the news tonight, it was justified.
I successfully just painted my toenails. do I get a trophy or something ?
Yes you deserve one!!!! How did you do it? I'm having a pedi tomorrow morning, I can't even bother trying! Shaving my legs during shower tonight was already hard enough of a task...
DH and I decided we want to do a meet and greet in May. Since I plan everything way in advance, I set up a Facebook event for family. Apparently my dad (who is an atheist) thinks it's creepy and bad luck to set a date for a party for a baby that isn't born yet. I told him that he sounds like his old Jewish mother.
He also tried to tell me that my EDD may be off by 2-3 weeks. My EDD is based off of a first tri ultrasound... I'm pretty sure a first tri ultrasound wouldn't be off by THAT much. Especially since I know exactly what day I had to have conceived.
Oh, and watch out. My husband has heartburn and is laying on the couch covering his face like its the worst time of his life. If you see me on the news tonight, it was justified.
Oh, and watch out. My husband has heartburn and is laying on the couch covering his face like its the worst time of his life. If you see me on the news tonight, it was justified.
I love Slapsgiving! DH said "Just because you hurt doesn't mean I can't hurt too." Yes, that is technically true. I have a feeling my husband is slowly joining the pre-baby freak out club.
Re: **The Everything Random Thread for April Mamas**
We lost two pregnancies before concieving DS. Those two losses were hard on me, and I still mourn the deaths of the two children that I will never meet.
When I was about 12 months PP with DS I debated talking to DH about being one and done, because I was so terrified of losing multiple pregnancies in order for us to have a healthy child.
Then I got pregnant with a surprise. One that had the odds against him because of how late I ovulated. I mentally prepared myself to miscarry... I spent two months in fear... But he beat the odds and stuck.
After we found out that this would be our second boy, DH convinced me that trying again when LO was older would be worth it--even if we did have to suffer another loss. HE convinced ME that our family wasn't complete just yet, and I took it to heart. For the past four months, I've imagined that I'll have a family of five in the end...
And then he just shatters the image that he's painted in my mind with the mere suggestion of a vasectomy.
Why would you do that to a pregnant woman who's overly emotional? To the woman you convinced that any future loss would be worth it because we would end up with a sweet little bundle of joy?
I know he didn't make the suggestion to hurt me. He probably even forgot that he was the one who convinced me into having three kids. It just... Hurt. Especially with the timing.
The end of this month marks three years since we lost our first baby. Our second would be turning two years old next month if I had not miscarried.
I love DS. I wouldn't trade him for either one of my other children. I know a lot of other moms on here have had losses and moved on so quickly and easily, but I never have. I know that it's ok to be sad over them, just like it's ok to not be sad over a miscarriage. Everyone sees a miscarriage under a different light... DH never looked at our losses the way I did. He never held it against me, not I him.
Sorry for the really long post.
It's possible that because of your financial situation, your husband is freaking out about needing to provide for anyone else. Obviously this baby is happening but perhaps his fear stems from this pregnancy being an oops - it could definitely happen again. It sounds like he's over-correcting. I've come to realize that men are sensitive creatures - sometimes even more sensitive than women, because it's not socially acceptable for them to be sensitive around anyone but their wives, so we get the brunt of it. There's a chance that your husband's change of heart is actually coming from a good place, even if it is misguided. It sounds like he's willing to talk about the IUD option, so you already have a good starting point for a calm, sober conversation.
Dont let some idiotic blabbering ruin your day. But, if you need to throw in a jab, being a calm and rational pregnant woman in a heated conversation is vindication in itself.
@AmadorRose I think we do seriously forget how stressful pregnancy is for the SO, since we're so concentrated on growing a human. I know that we've had a lot of non-pregnancy related things to stress about, but DH is also trying to make sure I'm ok, LO is ok, and that DS is ok. He's had to take on so much this pregnancy between my broken finger, my HG, all of my pain, moving, and DS. I've been trying my best to let him have as much "me time" as possible, but that hasn't really been working out very well with moving and all of my pain issues...
Cavs are good again but it's definitely Browns town. Of course, I think the Indians are the best team but I'm a baseball nut.
ETA it's also very cheap to live here
Bonus points if you get my reference.
We don't have girl-thieving dudes named Leland here
do I get a trophy or something ?
Fingers crossed this is finally it and we can move on with our lives without the constant worry of whether he can stay here or not. It's such a huge burden off my shoulders and I really wanted to get it done before I gave birth.
I am not religious but I will be praying to all the gods that we get the application approved
nice, I'm being checked out by 70 year olds.
He also tried to tell me that my EDD may be off by 2-3 weeks. My EDD is based off of a first tri ultrasound... I'm pretty sure a first tri ultrasound wouldn't be off by THAT much. Especially since I know exactly what day I had to have conceived.
I love Slapsgiving! DH said "Just because you hurt doesn't mean I can't hurt too." Yes, that is technically true. I have a feeling my husband is slowly joining the pre-baby freak out club.