Nice way to tell everyone to wait

hunter0710

so I have decided I want people to not visit in hospital and to please wait to visit until we are home and settled and feel comfortable with a parade of people. Anyone have any good ways to word a mass post?

CarrieOct15

I get where you're coming from, but I wouldn't send it in a mass post. It seems insensitive to the people who want to be there for you & your LO. Everyone should take your feelings into consideration, but don't forget to take other people's into consideration as well. I would just have a quick chat with anyone who plans on visiting the hospital & let them know that you have decided not to accept visitors until you're home. Be assertive, so they know this is your final decision, but not aggressive. 

"I know you had planned to visit us at the hospital, but I have decided not to accept visitors for X reasons. I'd love for you to come visit when we get home, though." 

thegingeravenger

100% what @CarrieOct15 said. Write yourself a nice script if you need to and whenever you talk to the people that want to visit just let them know. The problem with some sort of written post is that the tone often is misread as bitchy even if that wasn't your intention.

hunter0710

The reason I am thinking mass post is due to so many friends being associated with other "so called friends " that are only wanting to get the "scoop" on baby. I want drama free and meaningful people there. So I thought if I wipe the whole slate with no visitors to all, no one can go back to another person and say "well I didn't get that text" or call... Ya know? People come out of the woodworks for us whenever there is a major life event- people that aren't normally involved in our lives. My thought for the wording is something like


Thank you to everyone who has supported us with the pregnancy and our new addition! While I'm super grateful for everyone's help and support I do want to ask that everyone planning to visit the hospital please know that I do not want to have visitors until we are home and settled in. The time in the hospital is normally quite chaotic and a very intimate for our family. Please respect our first few days together to get our family reacquainted and let me heal. We will ABSOLUTELY let everyone know when we will be accepting visitors once we are home and settled into our adjusted lives with our new addition!

I planned on individually calling or texting the two or three people that we don't mind being there... Is this still a bad idea you think?

MyCousinVinny

You could always just announce the birth of your baby once you are home.  I know it sounds crazy but if there are truly only a handful of people that you want to have visit at the hospital, you could pull them aside, let them know your feelings on visitors, and ask them to keep quiet about the baby until you are home.

If others ask why they weren't notified that you were in labor, you can always say that things progressed so fast that you didn't have time! 

hunter0710

Let's just say there's far more people I DONT want there than I do we are being induced Tuesday and I haven't told anyone yet for this reason specifically....

CarrieOct15

If you're being induced on Tuesday, and nobody even knows, then I would skip the message like @MyCousinVinny suggested. Nobody can argue if they don't know! Also, make it clear to the hospital staff that you are not accepting visitors as well.

cMichelle0423

We never told anyone when I went into labor with our second. With the exception of my MIL because she had to watch our first LO and my parents because they live out of state, everyone else found out when we were ready for them to know. We didn't wait long to tell them, but we wanted to at least be settled in our recovery room first.

sarahsnowball

I agree with the advice you have been given. Confide in the few people you are allowing to visit and explain to them that you want a few days without the world wanting to visit, then wait until you're ready before you announce the birth. As a PP said, any questions about why can be batted away with a response like "everything happened so fast"

Edited in an attempt to make more sense

christina4436

Just don't tell anyone the details!

kanga915

Agree you shouldn't tell anyone anything until you're home.

nram25

Exactly what @MyCousinVinny said!!