I really want to know if me and my SO are stepping on Ettiqute here. My MIL has a extremely controlling side, it's like a 24/7 side. she offered to throw us a shower awhile back even though this baby was an oops. Well her first set of dates, she wanted and thought was best was thanksgiving weekend. So and I talked it over and said that we just think that will be hard for all of his friends to come being a lot of people go out of town. She kinda got annoyed but said ok, then she wanted the nov 7th and we had said perfect, well now she said the weather in November might be iffy, but if anything.... We can do a baby shower in her garage :-/ . So then she said it's just too iffy and wanted October 24th, well SO works every other weekend and that will be a weekend he's working and his friends from the crew are working..So then she had the balls to ask if she could take my moms shower date because SO isn't apart of that shower, which I firmly said no because she knows we have invites, date set with restaurant and he IS apart of my moms shower. So THEN she says that she had saved all of October to plan a shower, so I said ok..... How about October 3rd and apparently that won't work because that's her friends daughters baby shower date and none of her friends will be able to come :-/. She finally got upset but said fine to the other November date, and said we best pray for good weather....am I being rude here? I'm at the point where I don't even want a baby shower from her. It seems like if it's not her first choice or inconveniencing someone else... Like changing my moms shower date. Then it just won't work for her. Is it rude to politely say thanks but no thanks? What's the Ettiqute here? Or best way to go about this.