STM- Big sister/brother gift

alandaim

Hi All,

This is a little early but I have been thinking about it so I figured I would ask. Is anyone getting the big brothers/sisters a gift for when the new baby is born.

I have always thought it was weird when people bring gifts for the children who are not having the birthday party. I figure they need to learn to celebrate whoever is having the birthday and not think they should always get something. Is this the same thing?

Yes/no? If yes, what are you thinking? Thanks!

ntyravgsp

I've heard of others doing this but we aren't going to. It'll be shortly after Christmas so I'm thinking DD will have enough new toys around.
Just my opinion, but I don't want her to think that she shouldn't be curious about the new baby, or want to touch it, or help with some of the things - handing baby a toy, covering with a blanket or helping with diaper change etc; which is what I have seen a particular friend do with their older child, to detrimental results. I'm going to be paying a lot of attention to the new baby so she will too, and I don't expect a special toy would be more interesting for very long. We'll just have to see how it goes.

jessielynn1

We just got him a shirt that says best big brother. We did it more so he could feel included in what was going on and he was all excited. I wouldn't do anything more then that.

jeanbug12

We won't be doing big bro/sis gifts. But we do always give them gifts on their siblings birthday I always got gifts on my sisters birthday growing up even when I was in high school, I have no idea why my parents did it but I have continued the tradition! I really don't buy my kids things randomly so it is usually something they need like new shoes or clothes, the birthday boy/girl gets all the cool stuff.

kducharme

Thank you for asking this! I have been wondering the same thing and very curious what others think. Personally I'm still unsure if we will be getting her a gift maybe just a special dinner where the whole family goes to celebrate baby but I don't know

ainverso

I am going to get my little boy something but more a special toy to play with when I am busy with the baby (ex bf baby or putting down for nap) That way it serves 2 purposes.

mrhargr

I have been thinking about getting DD a baby doll so she has a baby to take care of, too. She is really into mimicking me lately so I feel like it could be good bonding for us when the baby is born.

nanamp

I will be a FTM, but I have many nieces and nephews. The idea is that the big sibling gift comes from the baby, not from the parents so that the older sibling might feel more connected to the baby.

jeanbug12

nanamp said:

I will be a FTM, but I have many nieces and nephews. The idea is that the big sibling gift comes from the baby, not from the parents so that the older sibling might feel more connected to the baby.

I have heard of people doing it like that, but my kids are only 3 and 4 and they would never buy that. They are so concrete in their thinking right now, a gift from their newborn sibling would only cause me hours of questions. My son is especially skeptical, I am scared for Santa Claus this year!

erincjackson

With our youngest our older kids were 6 and 8 so they were more concerned about where me and the baby were going to be vs a gift. So we did a sibling class at the hospital so they could take a tour of the ward and see where we would be and they made the baby a little gift. With this baby our youngest will be 2 1/2 so we will probably get her a "big sister" shirt and probably a baby. I have a feeling she will have a hard time adjusting as she is definitely the baby in our house right now.

MommaB16

Completely different than the birthday thing. When I met my now husband he was giving both his kids gifts on each of their birthdays. We weaned away from this within a year or so because I didn't agree with the perception this gave them that everything is always equal. It wasn't about the stuff, it was about how that would raise them. Now I don't judge anyone else that does this, it just wasn't a lesson I wanted taught in my own home.
I am getting them big brother and big sister gifts though because this is a major moment where our family's will have something so big to share. It's a part of their dad and it's a part of me. My step kids will be almost 14 and 11 when LO is born so their gifts will just be something like new earbuds, some candy, maybe a movie, or movie tickets, etc. (open to ideas!! : ) ) Just some fun stuff to show them that they have a new role, but still get to be themselves and kids too.

DaphneMoon1

We will probably get him something "from the baby". I'm not sure what yet. I'm a little nervous that he isn't going to like the idea of a baby coming home with us. When he sees babies now he says he doesn't like them.

ntyravgsp

@DaphneMoon1 he might change his mind when he realizes the baby is his/yours though.

denaeb

I plan to give my DD a gift from the new baby. We will also go out before baby comes and have her pick out a special gift for her to give the new baby.
Before baby comes I'm planning a special "mommy and Ella" day when we will go out for lunch, and get her ears pierced and maybe go shopping or to a movie.

mamaksweez

You guys have great ideas! I hadn't thought about this at all! My dd is young, she'll be 19mo when baby comes, so I don't think she would understand any reasoning behind getting a gift. I think getting a little sibling is going to be a big enough present, and like a pp said, I want her interested in the baby so she can help out, etc. (I realize her "helping out" will be like handing me a diaper, not like help help). I do think if my kids were older I might do it differently.

apinkpelican

mrhargr said:

I have been thinking about getting DD a baby doll so she has a baby to take care of, too. She is really into mimicking me lately so I feel like it could be good bonding for us when the baby is born.

Same here. She's been rocking her stuffed animals so I think she needs a baby doll to love on to 'prepare' for baby. She's still too young to understand she's getting a baby brother. I'm not sure what she'll understand at 20 months either I haven't thought about getting her a gift when the baby comes. Maybe a new toy at Grandma & Grandpas while they are watching her the first couple nights

ntyravgsp

@apinkpelican YGPM

Cejiml

We will just put something small aside from Christmas like a game or puzzle and give that to DD from baby. She is almost 3 and talks about brother a lot so I know she will be appreciative.

blue**eyes

Still on the fence on this but thinking that yes, we will get a gift for DS from the baby. I will also let him pick out a gift to give to the baby.

kmcc14

I hadn't really thought about this.  SD and SS have been begging for a sibling since before DH and I got married, so I think the baby is going to be enough of a gift for them.  They are both very excited for this LO to get here.

Eastoncjr

I'm the 2nd of 5 kids we're each about 2 years apart and when a new baby arrived the youngest kid got a stuffed animal as a big brother/sister gift. Most of us still have that special toy. I'll probably do the same thing for DS.

fragglemom

My brother was 2 when I was born. He was given a Hershey bar from me. He was thrilled. No one had ever given him a whole candy bar just for him.

DaphneMoon1

jessfragione said:

My brother was 2 when I was born. He was given a Hershey bar from me. He was thrilled. No one had ever given him a whole candy bar just for him.

That's really cute. I need to think of something equally small and memorable.

laineylove78

DD will be 18m. I'd like to get her something small. She has a baby doll we've been playing with and loves it. And she's been around babies and she's super cute with them. I'm not sure how much she'll understand about a new baby coming home but I'm excited for her to be a big sister and would like to get her something small but special. We shall see.

Cricket99

I've seen people do a Big Brother or Big Sister kit for younger kids. They get a small backpack filled with things that are helpful for the new baby. Pacifiers, soft toys, rattles, a blanket. It's all things that help them interact with baby. I think it's a cute idea and really encourages them to help and bond with their new sibling.

alandaim

Lots of good ideas! I like the idea of having them exchange shirts (big sister/little brother) although we aren't finding out the sex until birth so I might have to pick up one of each. DD will be just under 2 when the new baby comes so I also like the idea of having her help out as much as possible. Mainly bringing things

mamaksweez

@alandaim we haven't been able to find a big sister shirt in a size smaller than a 3T. My dd is in 18mo clothes, and I'm assuming yours is smaller than a 3T too. If you find a shirt that works for you guys, let me know where you got it! I'd love a big sister shirt for my dd.

mysquishy18

I think we'll get DD something she can do while visiting the hospital. Then it serves two purposes of being a small gift and keeping her from running crazy in the hospital room. I know from experience that some jealously, and regression, and craziness comes into play when a 2 year old comes to visit their new sibling. Having something for them to focus on after meeting the baby really helps.

jeanbug12

mamaksweez said:

@alandaim we haven't been able to find a big sister shirt in a size smaller than a 3T. My dd is in 18mo clothes, and I'm assuming yours is smaller than a 3T too. If you find a shirt that works for you guys, let me know where you got it! I'd love a big sister shirt for my dd.

Target.com has 18 months, and it is only like $5! Those just one you big sis shirts actually run really small so your DD might need a 2. I am having the opposite problem, I wanted some shirts for photos but my son needs a 5 and I can't find one, I ordered that one from target but it was way too small.

danasphillips

We will give him a little gift in the hospital "from the baby".