Help! Any thoughts welcome

mzkhanh

i am a FTM and i have a 4 month old. Me and the father have separated since before my baby was 3 months old. I dont like it but i let him pick her up every weekend because i feel like its his right as a father. But im worried for her development because she sees so many different people on a daily basis. Any thoughts?

babyh310

Long ago, we lived more in groups. The way we live now, so separate, is relatively new. Exposing your baby to different people can be a great thing! Baby will be more adjusted and have better social skills. I love exposing my son to different things. Your sweet babe still has the consistency of mama and daddy regularly just with extra outside folks as well. This is a positive thing. I'm really sorry your relationship didn't work out, and wish you the best as you navigate co-parenting!! ♡

KD32412

I agree with PP. It's a great thing for her to be properly socialized, it's also awesome that your ex is still involved in her life. Kudos to you for allowing him to have time with her, some parents aren't that amicable.

These are some things you may want to consider. Take it or leave it, just my thoughts. (Keep in mind I'm quite controlling and a bit paranoid in nature):

Routines: Children do best when they have routines and boundaries. It creates a feeling of safety in knowing what's coming and expectations. As she gets older, this will become more important to her. You both may want to create routines that she can depend upon regardless of her location.

Friends/Family: Who is she socializing with on a regular basis? I wouldn't let my kids be around chain smokers and habitual drinkers. Seriously, just anyone "questionable" would not be allowed alone time with my kids.

Of course, as she gets older you will both find new things to plan for- foods she's allowed to eat, bedtimes, media, rules, dress, etc.

Sounds like so far you are doing good! Best of luck to you both.

Mic512

Agree with PPs - one thing to consider is if she will be going back & forth you will NEED a custody agreement in place that sets up schedules & expectations. Think holidays, important events and other decisions that will need to be made down the line. Watched a friend go through an awful time with her ex not returning their child on time & without an agreement (either one you work out together in writing or through a judge) it's hard to make anything stick.

mzkhanh

Thank you for the replies. It helps me see the situation from different perspectives. And yes. One of my main concerns is i dont know what goes on at the other house and as a parent i wanna know that my daughter is being raised the way I want her to be raised.