First one on one meeting with my new manager. — The Bump
January 2016 Moms

First one on one meeting with my new manager.

ladies.


I started my new job when I was just about 9 to 10 weeks. I found out about my pregnancy when I was serving notice at my old company. I would have stayed at my old company if I found out before I resigned.


So we just had an update meeting with my new manager and she is very impressed with my work so far. Her feedback was super positive and she's planning on helping me grow in my career.

I still haven't told her that I am pregnant and I am now 16 weeks and I was planning to tell her after my probation period ends (second week of September). After this meeting I felt like I was betraying her, but I am super scared of losing my job. I need the money. My pregnancy hasn't affected my work in anyway so far and I have planned to have my OB and other appointments on Saturdays.

I really don't know what to do but I am thinking of spilling the beans before my probation period ends and risk losing my job?

Please help.

Re: First one on one meeting with my new manager.

  • Well, as I am sure you know, she could not legally fire you because you are pregnant, even during your probation period. But during your probation period, unfortunately there doesn't have to be a whole lot of reason to let you go, so she probably could find a way if she wanted to. That being said, not all managers want to get rid of pregnant women, it just depends on the person and the company. Personally, I would wait until after the probation period ends just for the added security.
    CaraBoonie
  • I'm waiting until after my anatomy scan to tell my new boss and am just going to tell her that we don't tell anyone outside of family and close friends before that point.
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  • I would wait. This is not dishonest and you aren't betraying her. I'm sure she'll be happy with you when you share the news. She may have to make some adjustments to plans but when you tell her explain you wanted to wait until further along in your pregnancy and that you are still committed to excelling at the company.
    Good luck!
  • mahlodmahlod member
    My concern is that the belly is going to sell me out. But luckily it's winter on our side of the work (South Africa) so I get to wear scarfs and that hides it.
    I just don't want her to be the one confronting me about it. But I will wait and see.
    apinkpelican
  • mahlodmahlod member
    But thank you ladies.
  • mahlod said:

    My concern is that the belly is going to sell me out. But luckily it's winter on our side of the work (South Africa) so I get to wear scarfs and that hides it.
    I just don't want her to be the one confronting me about it. But I will wait and see.

    If she confronts you about it she's a jerk. But yes by Mid-Sept it may be hard to hide. If it gets to that point I guess I'd tell her. They can't legally fire you. But the more time you give them to appreciate your work the better!
    mahlod
  • I would definitely tell her ASAP. As your belly gets bigger and it becomes more obvious, you risk her figuring it out or suspecting it on her own, and that could make her think you're not as trustworthy as she thought. Once you tell her in September she'll know that you've known for awhile since the baby is due in January. You don't want to claim to be one of those women that took 5 months to know she was pregnant. I mean it's definitely your right to tell your boss whenever you want, I just think it's better to be upfront about it than to keep it from her. When you do tell her, make sure you know the company's policy on maternity leave and how long you plan on being out, etc..
    claireloSC
  • I am in the same boat and have decided to tell them between August 15 and Sept 2...
  • I was on a similar situation with my 1st baby. I started work AT 16 weeks but I didn't show until I was 7 months. I didn't tell my boss until after my probation period either....but she had even confronted me a week after I started in front of everyone in a meeting...actually she went down the table and asked every woman in the meeting if they were pregnant and asked me last. I lied and said not as far as I know....I felt like a piece of crap for lying but I wasn't ready.
    After my probation period I had a one on one meeting with my boss about my progress and that is when I told her and explained why I had lied. She said she found out I was pregnant that day she had asked everyone from another employee who happened to be friends with a few of my ex coworkers at my former job. I actually told her that I knew she wouldn't have hired me if she knew I was pregnant. She didn't say anything just kind of smiled and proceeded to give me positive feedback on my progress along with a nice size raise. So I personally do not regret my decision but the day I lied I did go home and cry .... Not because i lied to them but because I denied my womb/child.... My husband thought I was CRAZY!
    Myelhsa
  • @TifVB I am just really scared, but I am happy it worked out for you.
    I will let you guy how it goes. I need to tell her before end of this month.
    claireloSC
  • edited August 2015
    I'm in a similar situation. I found out I was pregnant my first week at a new job. Thankfully the probation period was only 3 months, so I haven't had to tell them yet and I haven't started to show. But I'm still struggling with when to tell them, especially since there is no mention of maternity leave in the company policies or handbook and I'm ineligible for FMLA. I worry they will find a way to fire me for something stupid after telling them. I'm going to wait as long as possible since telling them is like saying I'm leaving in January (I'm not returning to work after delivery). The best advice I've heard is to focus on the positives and how your pregnancy won't negatively effect the company. Go to that meeting with a plan to tell them when you will be back and how the team can cope while you are out. Good luck! :)
    mahlod
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