Miscarriage anniversary

ALC08

I hope this is ok to post here. The anniversary of my first miscarriage is coming up in just over a week. I had a 2nd MC in April and have been kind of a mess lately. I have tried to keep my MCs from most people. I am just a private person and don't generally like to share personal stuff. Lately I find myself wondering if It would make me feel better to get it out in the open. Would it be a relief to get it off my chest? I don't want people asking a bunch of questions which is part of why i kept it quiet. Who did you choose to share with? Any advice or thoughts on getting through the anniversary would be appreciated too!

AL_TwinCities

I'm so sorry for your losses. I am coming up on the anniversary of my loss as well. I had told my immediate family, and a couple close friends that I was pregnant, and then obviously had to let them all know about the MC. On mother's day, I called to wish my mom a happy mothers day and was catching up with both of my parents on the phone, and I totally broke down. It was really nice to be able to talk to them about it, as DH didn't seem to feel the loss as acutely as I did, and he really doesn't know what to do when I am upset. One of my work friends who I told has had several MCs of her own, so I plan on talking to her if this upcoming anniversary is difficult. I hope you find some solace in a friend. Hugs to you!

carrieandr

I'm sorry for your losses as well. I'm still hoping I'll get pregnant before my previous EDD. I haven't even thought ahead to the anniversaries of getting PG or the MMC or D&E. 

I definitely recommend talking about it.  I told my family and friends because I didn't like feeling like it never happened. 

ALC08

Thanks for the support. Sorry for your losses as well.

spatter1

I'm so sorry for your losses. Everyone is different. Personally I told all of my close friends about my MC even though several of them didn't even know I was pregnant. Like previous posters have said, I just couldn't act like it didn't happen and it has helped to have a small group of people aside from my husband that I can talk to when I'm having a bad day.

The only thing I would caution you of if you decide to tell people is to be prepared for some really annoying comments. People want to be helpful but often don't realize that their comments can be very insensitive in your eyes. Not saying this to discourage you because I don't regret telling people at all!

Good luck and again I'm so sorry you are going through this.

carrieandr

@spatter1 -- my favorite is "trying is the fun part."  Yes, this is super fun!  I'm not upset at all!  8-|

jessicalacey1226

So sorry for everyone's losses!
@CarrieandRoy I love that one too. Especially given all the times I've ended up crying after because I would suddenly get flooded with emotions (not that it wasn't fun up until then

carrieandr

@jessicalacey1226, what I find funny is that my husband and I have been having sex for years and will continue to have sex for decades. So when someone basically says that the bright side of a miscarriage is that we get to have sex, all I can think is "That would be happening anyway!!" :-w