NBR: guest taking shoes off, rude?

LoveLee85

I'm looking for ways to nicely ask people who come into my home to take their shoes off?! Lol. So far I've tried:
maybe they'll follow me by example, didn't work.
Basket by the front door with shoes in it, and that's where I put my does when I take them off in front of them, didn't work.

I'm kind of a germ freak, and it really is disgusting to think that all the nasty stuff people walk around in the world. Then there going to get it all over your rugs carpet.

I always take my shoes off or ask if I should when I go in anyone's home! It's how I was raised.

Are there other polite ways besides just saying 'hey take your shoes off please?' Or, am I rude to ask guest in my home to take their shoes off?? I don't mind doing it at other people's homes because I grew up that way.

jen83mn

I would just say something as they're coming in the door and are standing in the entryway like, "You can just leave your shoes in the basket by the door" in a casual, friendly way. I don't think that's rude at all!

maryanne007

Offer them slippers!

eah325

I understand from where you're coming but I, for one, hate being barefoot. If I knew your rules, I would plan accordingly and at least wear socks to your house. I think at a minimum you should have socks or footies by the basket if you're asking people to remove their shoes.

All of that being said- I believe when I host people in my home, I want them to feel as comfortable as possible. Given that I know I am uncomfortable taking my shoes off, I would not ask that of people. That's just me, though.

thinkpink101

We are a no shoes in the house household as well. I was raised that way and I couldn't imagine walking around with outside shoes inside. Gross! We have a shoe rack inside the door and very rarely do people not take the hint. I will ask the kids' friends to take their shoes off, I haven't asked an adult yet. Our exception is parties. But I have to mop multiple times before the floors are truly clean afterwords. So gross!!

WDDCH

I have hardwoods and it's still gross to me. My in-laws are the opposite: keep shoes on in their house. She's a germaphobe so I don't get it. If they stop by they never think to even ask/offer to remove shoes. One time I told them I'd appreciate it if they took their shoes off but they told me FIL can't because of his diabetes. Ooooookay. Guess who is never invited over? They come over just to drop something off, sure, but we don't do get-togethers here if people refuse my rules. If they babysit it is done at their house.

My midwife just carpeted her "exam room" (it's a room in her house) and she just said, "Shoes off!" Lol. You could put a cute sign on the door like "No Shoes Past Foyer" or "We have a no shoes policy indoors". Your house, your rules. People don't want to follow your rules then they don't come over?!

Another idea is to keep a basket of house slippers by the door that they can wear when at your home. Slippers that are only worn indoors won't be tracking gunk from outside. That way they're comfortable and not self-conscious but your carpets don't get nasty.

sgleave

I've been asked to take my shoes off lots of times and I've never been offended or thought they were rude. Go for it, I wouldn't feel bad at all!

LoveLee85

I love reading all the replies! I have no problem asking any kids, just haven't asked any adults yet. I like the socks at the front door or slippers at the front door! PS i'm also the weirdo that cleans off the bottom of her own shoes with cleansing wipes. lol

LouLouLove

A friend of mine has a sign on her door that says, "Little hands touch our floor so please leave your shoes at the door". I thought it was a cuter way to ask.

Edit posted too soon

Knottie58492256

I have a sign outside that says "unless you're Jesus or george strait, please take off your boots!" Just a cute and fun way to ask without having to feel like I'm nagging!

bcasey12410

My friend had this sign made: Because little hands touch our floor, please leave your shoes at the door

rholbrook7

IKEA has some cheap slippers for a dollar a piece. They come in all different sizes and colors. I leave a basket by the door for shoes to be put into, and the other basket has slippers in them. I've always taken my shoes off before entering people's homes. It's just the way I was raised. The idea of a sign is a good way to do it too.

LoveLee85

Rhill30 said:

LoveLee85 said:

I love reading all the replies! I have no problem asking any kids, just haven't asked any adults yet. I like the socks at the front door or slippers at the front door! PS i'm also the weirdo that cleans off the bottom of her own shoes with cleansing wipes. lol

My husband rolls up his pants when he gets home from work because of using public bathrooms all day. We're a house full of weirdos too

I love this! Confession: I have NEVER flushed a public toilet with anything other than my shoe! It's the main reason why I take bleach wipes to my shoes. HAHA

AmandaNacora

I'm lucky as its custom in my husbands culture to remove your shoes after entering someone's house. We have hard wood and dogs in this house so we usually where house slippers or flip flops downstairs but remove them before standing on the carpet. Honestly just ask your guests to remove their shoes when coming in, I had to with my family and friends and they didn't mind, and now they do it automatically. If you have light colored carpet tell them your trying to keep it nice, because seriously having dirty shoes on light carpet makes it so dingy si fast!

jbettles

We have three dogs and two cats, plus we are doing a major remodel. I'm constantly cleaning my floors but they never seem clean "enough" (all hardwood, no carpet). My sister is a shoes off in the house person and I have to INSIST she leave them on when she comes over, lol! But she has me take mine off when I come to her house - I hate my feet, they are gross despite my best cream/pumice stone/loofah efforts, so I always take slipper socks when I go to her house

mschris00

Simple - move to Asia! Everyone takes their shoes off before entering the house - it's rude NOT to! >-

PreggersinParis

I also grew up in a no shoes house but don't implement this rule as an adult when we have guests over. I may start now that we'll have a baby but think I'll provide options like slippers because some people aren't comfortable walking around barefoot, especially in the winter and the rainy season when it can be a little chilly on tile and hardwood floors.

So, OP, no, it's not at all rude, but maybe provide options?

bcamasosa

I'm asian, and it is a custom to remove your shoes when you enter one's home. I don't know why I have never even had to ask our "non-asian" friends to do it, they just do it. I don't think it is rude to ask someone to remove their shoes, like PPs said, leave a basket with indoor slippers by the door so your guests can use them, also, having a sign is an awesome idea i think!

mamadeez

I've always felt that if you aren't comfortable being barefoot in someone's house that you should probably be prepared by having your own slippers or socks. Sharing slippers or socks doesn't appeal to me, personally. But then again it may because I think of this when picking shoes before going to a persons house.

sphillips18

I just tell people straight up to take their shoes off in my house.

nicthomaspark

I am totally blown away that you even have to ask someone to take off their shoes! I would NEVER walk into someones house with my shoes on and I would consider it very rude if someone just walked into my place with theirs. I dont like being barefoot in most peoples homes so I always bring a pair of socks. I wouldn't feel rude asking someone to remove their shoes, but a cute sign at the front door would definitely do the trick as well!

squigles28

https://naturallysavvy.com/live/you-absolutely-need-to-stop-wearing-shoes-in-your-house


I read this today, I feel the need to bleach my floors immediately!

sarahlinde

I would never ask people to take their shoes off! Close family and all kids, yes! My close family and kids know no shoes in the house. We have get togethers and partys all the time, I think it would be very rude of me to ask guests to take shoes off!

theglitteredpterodactyl

I fall pretty in the middle when it comes to this. I prefer no shoes, and I don't mind telling my sister to take them off when she comes over, but we also have hardwood floors and a big monster of a dog so it's hard to have immacuately dog hair free floors all the time, and I'm not going to insist someone go barefoot or in socks if they're not comfortable with it. I also find that it's rare people don't follow our lead though when we take our shoes off so we don't run into the shoe wearing problem a whole lot.

krose92

I guess I'm a weirdo because I prefer to take my shoes off when indoors!  I've gotten weird looks a few times for asking if I could remove shoes at somebody else's house lol

That being said, I would never require anybody to take their shoes off in my own home, unless they are children or have especially muddy shoes.  Both of my parents suffer bad feet problems (dad is diabetic, mom just has bad luck!)  It's painful for either of them to go barefoot, and I wouldn't dream of putting them through that suffering.

Mandii385

I love this question lol. When DH and I moved into our house about 2years ago we attempted to ask people to take their shoes off since we had new carpeting, some people just didn't listen. When dd1 was born we put a little sign on our front door that reads "since little fingers touch our floor, please remove your shoes at the door" we get comments all time about how cute the sign is and people seem to respond very well to it.

OSULisa

WDDCH said:

I have hardwoods and it's still gross to me. My in-laws are the opposite: keep shoes on in their house. She's a germaphobe so I don't get it. If they stop by they never think to even ask/offer to remove shoes. One time I told them I'd appreciate it if they took their shoes off but they told me FIL can't because of his diabetes. Ooooookay. Guess who is never invited over? They come over just to drop something off, sure, but we don't do get-togethers here if people refuse my rules. If they babysit it is done at their house.

Diabetes can cause nerve damage in the feet causing someone to lose feeling and be unstable when standing.

My father who has this problem has house/indoor shoes that he never wears outside. He brings them with him when he visits. I'd rather him wear clean shoes inside than fall at my home.

Maybe you could make that suggestion to your FIL.

v1wwo

No, no, ew, ew!
Growing up my parents never ever let us walk in the house with shoes. If I forgot something and I knew it was sitting on the table 10 feet away from the entryway, too bad. Shoes had to be off and sometimes it was a pain in the butt. Also, I learned make sure I have everything I need before putting on shoes.
I am not so strict about it... I tippy toe in my house when I forget something. But everyone knows shoes come off when you in my house. And I never had a problem with it. In fact people started to follow their own no-shoe-rule in their own homes because of me.
I also do the same when I go over some else's home even if I know they wear shoes in the house. And people do notice.

Edit: and we have a dog and he knows that right after his walk he has to go to the kitchen so he can get his paws, butt, peepee hole cleaned and get his snack. I know, it sounds like over kill.

rachelkawesome

This is an interesting discussion! 

Growing up in Pittsburgh, I don't remember taking off your shoes being a thing - except my one friend in middle school whose dad didn't want anything messing up the carpets. In most houses (including my own) visitors left shoes on. 

But now living in New York city, it's MUCH more the culture here to take off your shoes in someone's home (probably because New York sidewalks are totally disgusting and the idea of tracking that around your home is so gross). Especially with kids - every person I ever babysat for had a 'no shoes' rule. And I do ask people to take off their shoes, even if it's a party. We don't have very many rules in the house so I think I can get away with it haha! I just say "Please take off your shoes" - I think the only time I asked people to was when we had a housewarming, I think they've remembered since. We also have a bench near the door that I think reminds everyone.

babyplut

The only house I have been in the past 32 years that i wore shoes in was a farmhouse and they all did. Everyone I know takes their shoes off. I thought it was something that was just on tv where no one takes their shoes off in their houses...

michcoy85

My mom is this way and I have had friends ask us to remove ours once they had children, I never thought anything of it. It is your home and I think a majority of people won't bat an eye. If anyone has an issue with it they can leave.