Maternity Leave?

starsinnight

how long is your work giving you or are you planning? Or do you plan to be part-time/stay-at-home mom? How much time is REALLY needed for those of you that aren't first-timers?

I'm starting a new job at the end of August and will only have 3 weeks of vacation. It's a temporary position for 12 months and I'm worried they will be upset and not grant me any extra time beyond the 3 weeks, especially not paid. Anyone else know of people who've gone back to work ASAP?

My close friend is a nurse and gave birth 3 weeks ago & already sent her mother home wanting to be alone with baby and dad now. But she has 3 months paid leave. Trying not to stress! Would love your support & own experiences!

NoelBird

I don't know anyone who has gone back to work but my sister went back to full time college immediately after giving birth (was actually attending classes a week later). She didn't have any problems but she had an easy birth and recovery. I would have been a mess a week postpartum. I know that people do it. Can you take any unpaid time off after the baby? I would try and talk to them about it as soon as possible (after first tri) so they can make plans to cover your leave. 

My work offers full disability pay up to three months but the kicker is that it is truly only for disability. So as soon as my doctor wrote me back to work I had to go back. This was at 6 weeks for me. I used two weeks of vacation and went back to work at 8 weeks. This was very doable but it was hard for me adjusting to being a full time working mom. I was tired and felt that I was working 24 hours a day. But I got through it. This time I've been saving up vacation for the last two years so I am taking 12 weeks off. 

starsinnight

That is wonderful that you've been able to save time up. Id definitely have done that if I weren't going to be in residency and had a more stable job. I'm worried about telling them and am thinking about waiting as long as possible so they can get to know me. My work won't be able to be covered at all - so I'll just have to come back when I can if all goes well and as planned. I think it depends how much they like me or how nice they are as supervisors, whether they grant me the extra time. As an intern/resident, my supervisors will just have to take over my duties until I get back. Thanks for the help and I can't believe your sister went back after 1 week! I don't know if I could do that at all! But it will definitely be a 24 hour job working 8 hours then nursing and being a mom for the remainder of the day!!

BabySeaTurtles

Are you in the U.S.? If so, even as an intern, employers are required to follow FMLA standards which grants every worker 12 weeks of medical leave every year. They do not have to pay you but it sounds like you would have 3 of those weeks paid through your vacation time. Good luck!

jennymack79

BabySeaTurtles said:

Are you in the U.S.? If so, even as an intern, employers are required to follow FMLA standards which grants every worker 12 weeks of medical leave every year. They do not have to pay you but it sounds like you would have 3 of those weeks paid through your vacation time. Good luck!

But... I thought FMLA only took effect after 12 months of employment? Also, if she is considered a contract worker vs. employee, it may not apply either, though I really don't know for sure.

Katty422

Under FMLA I get 6 weeks. Plan on taking 1 week Vaca and one week unpaid. Total 8 weeks!

inomniaparatus

I plan on taking the 3 months the law requires employers to give you. Luckily, it will lead nicely into my yearly 3 month hiatus. So I'll be off 6 months but only the first two weeks are paid and during hiatus, I'll collect unemployment.

Sprinkles07

You'll have to check with your employer but FMLA will likely not be in play. Hopefully they can give you some extra time or your doctor can get you some sort of note depending on the kind of work it is you may be fine to go back after 3 weeks or not. I was a bit of a baby when it came to recovery but once six weeks hit I had just got into the swing of things and started feeling normal again. I remember thinking thank god I have another 6 weeks. This time around I am a SAHM.

paytonpedro

I'll be taking 12 weeks. It's the standard where I work.

LMMama

I think FMLA only applies if you have worked there for 12 months or a certain amount of hours. I plan on taking the full 3 month leave that is allowed. My work does not offer any pay during that time. However in New Jersey you can file a claim for family leave insurance, which is specifically for bonding with a newborn or caring for a sick family member. They provide 65% of your salary for 6 to 12 weeks. You should look to see if your state has any programs similar to that. I'm also trying to save enough to cover those 3 months just in case.

I know it's tough as a new employee but some work places can be very understanding and supportive. They may appreciate you telling them sooner rather than later.

inomniaparatus

LMMama said:

I think FMLA only applies if you have worked there for 12 months or a certain amount of hours. I plan on taking the full 3 month leave that is allowed. My work does not offer any pay during that time. However in New Jersey you can file a claim for family leave insurance, which is specifically for bonding with a newborn or caring for a sick family member. They provide 65% of your salary for 6 to 12 weeks. You should look to see if your state has any programs similar to that. I'm also trying to save enough to cover those 3 months just in case.

I know it's tough as a new employee but some work places can be very understanding and supportive. They may appreciate you telling them sooner rather than later.

Omg can I tell you - you just made my day! I just moved to jersey city from Manhattan and had noo idea this existed. Grant it, I only moved a week ago. I'm definitely looking into that.

LMMama

inomniaparatus said:

LMMama said:

I think FMLA only applies if you have worked there for 12 months or a certain amount of hours. I plan on taking the full 3 month leave that is allowed. My work does not offer any pay during that time. However in New Jersey you can file a claim for family leave insurance, which is specifically for bonding with a newborn or caring for a sick family member. They provide 65% of your salary for 6 to 12 weeks. You should look to see if your state has any programs similar to that. I'm also trying to save enough to cover those 3 months just in case.

I know it's tough as a new employee but some work places can be very understanding and supportive. They may appreciate you telling them sooner rather than later.

Omg can I tell you - you just made my day! I just moved to jersey city from Manhattan and had noo idea this existed. Grant it, I only moved a week ago. I'm definitely looking into that.

I just found out about it a few days ago from my work! I'm not sure if it's new, but I didn't know about it during my first pregnancy a few years ago and I'm bummed about that.

inomniaparatus

Seriously if you didn't mention it, I could have missed out on over 18 grand. I'd like to think, I would have eventually read about it in my research, but I'll give you the credit
Woohoo

jennpar21

Not all places have FMLA you must have at least 50 employee's to even have to follow those rules. With my first I was out 2 weeks and worked part time until 6. This time I am taking my 6 but the only way I will get paid is because I pay for a supplemental insurance that will pay me 60% of my income up to $200/week, which is not a lot but better than nothing, so it really all depends on your state an your work. Be sure and check before you assume!

kayjay44

There are standards for both federal and state leave. Many employers are willing to honor a 12 week leave even if you don't qualify so make sure you ask.

I took 3.5 months last time and will take 4 months this time. I'd recommend taking an absolute minimum of 6 weeks. You aren't even medically cleared until 6 weeks. I know a few people who went back at 6 weeks; it worked for some, not for others. I'm not aware of anyone that I personally know that has gone back sooner than that.

I'm happy to answer any other specific questions any one has.

Jilly82

With my first, I took 9 weeks.  It was enough IMO.  I am a teacher and only have about 20 days saved up.  I used most of them with my son.  I will have to take the rest of the time unpaid.  I have no idea how long I'm going to take yet.  The whole idea of not getting paid scares the crap out of me

BabyHope2013

Keep in mind that not all companies/organizations offer FMLA--I don't know the specifics, but it does depend on the number of employees in your place of employment. I think you might have to be full-time as well to qualify. 

I have been saving my vacation time up for maternity leave. Between what I can use from my sick bank and what I should have in my vacation bank, I can take up to 12 weeks. I am not sure I will take the full 12---I might only do 11. It was hard going back having no time in my bank. I couldn't take any days off when I was sick and it was even tougher when DS got sick and I didn't have time to stay home with him. 

I went back to work full-time after DS. It was hard, but I am fortunate to love my job. The first few weeks were the hardest until we got into a routine. I choose to go back to work because long term financially it makes more sense. It has it's challenges when daycare is closed or sick and trying to work around that---but I have always felt like I have been 100% a part of DS's life. 

inomniaparatus

inomniaparatus said:

Seriously if you didn't mention it, I could have missed out on over 18 grand. I'd like to think, I would have eventually read about it in my research, but I'll give you the credit
Woohoo

Boo max payout is 600/week so nowhere close to 2/3 my weekly salary but it's something...

jennpar21

Boo max payout is 600/week so nowhere close to 2/3 my weekly salary but it's something...

My disability plan will only pay $200/week not near mine either! $600 would be much better! @inomniaparatus

inomniaparatus

200!? That's crazy. Where do you live?

jennpar21

A little town in North West Georgia. My health insurance also will pay some for short term but using that makes the rates go up, I work for a small family owned business so they just paid me 20 hours when I had DS, but this time I have been paying my own supplemental because Id rather be able to enjoy my time off then work part time.  @inomniaparatus

inomniaparatus

Ugh don't you just wish the law required paid maternity leave! Unfair
We are bettering our future society by bonding with baby for first 3 months.

Life is Exciting

Bummer. Massachusetts, where I live, doesn't have paid family medical leave.

Paid Family Leave: Only three states, California, New Jersey and Rhode Island, offer paid family and medical leave. All three states fund their programs through employee-paid payroll taxes and are administered through their respective disability programs. The state of Washington passed a paid family leave law in 2007, originally to take effect in October 2009, but the law was never implemented and subsequent legislation has indefinitely postponed its implementation. (see our paid family leave page for more details.)

Source: https://www.ncsl.org/research/labor-and-employment/state-family-and-medical-leave-laws.aspx

Life is Exciting

I'm going to beg my employer to let me do a small amount of work from home when the baby is napping to try to supplement the leave I'll have to take. I have short term disability insurance which will pay me 60% of my pay for 6 weeks. Last time, I had a c-section and was definitely not ready to come back after 6 weeks. I stayed out for 11 weeks using a combination of banked leave time, short term disability, and work from home.

RMLandy

We are all choosing to have babies and take time off work. I don't think the law should require my employer to pay me to not work. SAHM moms are arguably bettering our future society more by foregoing the chance to work and earn money and they don't get paid for that. A lot of decent employers will pay for some maternity leave because it's the kind thing to do. But I dont think I am entitled to be paid for NOT working.

kayjay44

RMLandy said:

We are all choosing to have babies and take time off work. I don't think the law should require my employer to pay me to not work. SAHM moms are arguably bettering our future society more by foregoing the chance to work and earn money and they don't get paid for that. A lot of decent employers will pay for some maternity leave because it's the kind thing to do. But I dont think I am entitled to be paid for NOT working.

That's exactly what unemployment is. Those of us who pay taxes for government social and welfare programs should be able to reap some of the benefits for a few months. Governments with paid leaves report higher employee satisfaction and higher happiness ratings. I'm not entitled to be paid, but for as much as I pay in taxes, they should be able to help me out for a few months.

ashcody2

I'm still trying to figure it out for this child - with our first I toook 8 weeks off, I had used my vacation and sick days so I could get paid. I wanted to take off more time but it was tax season and they needed me back.

I am saving up my sick time again this time around - we've talked about me possibly working PT from home and coming in for half days, it just all depends on if I take over a new position (if the woman I am supposed to replace retires). 

RMLandy

Unemployment is for those who have lost their job and cannot find new employment through no fault of their own. Not for people who choose to quit and/or take time off.

froggy994

Last time, I took 14 weeks. I'm a teacher. 12 weeks were fmla, and 2 weeks were non work weeks of winter break. I was paid for 8 of the weeks since I had a c-section, but to be paid I had to use 40 of my sick days. The other 4 weeks were unpaid. This time, I think I will take 13, 12 of fmla and 1 non work week with spring break. I think that puts me going back to work in May. I'd love to just stay off for the rest of the school year, but don't think I can swing it.

I think you should at least plan on 6 weeks for vaginal and 8 if you have a c-section. That's the medical clearance time frames. The more time, the better, in my opinion.

LMMama

magnumJ said:

RMLandy said:

We are all choosing to have babies and take time off work. I don't think the law should require my employer to pay me to not work. SAHM moms are arguably bettering our future society more by foregoing the chance to work and earn money and they don't get paid for that. A lot of decent employers will pay for some maternity leave because it's the kind thing to do. But I dont think I am entitled to be paid for NOT working.

That's exactly what unemployment is. Those of us who pay taxes for government social and welfare programs should be able to reap some of the benefits for a few months. Governments with paid leaves report higher employee satisfaction and higher happiness ratings. I'm not entitled to be paid, but for as much as I pay in taxes, they should be able to help me out for a few months.

Agreed @magnum. The U.S. Is one of the few places in the world where paid maternity leave is not offered. Women can opt to or not to have a child, yes. The paid leave should be there for those who opt to. People shouldn't have to suffer financially for wanting a family. Alas the U.S. system is not particularly family friendly.

inomniaparatus

magnumJ said:

RMLandy said:

We are all choosing to have babies and take time off work. I don't think the law should require my employer to pay me to not work. SAHM moms are arguably bettering our future society more by foregoing the chance to work and earn money and they don't get paid for that. A lot of decent employers will pay for some maternity leave because it's the kind thing to do. But I dont think I am entitled to be paid for NOT working.

That's exactly what unemployment is. Those of us who pay taxes for government social and welfare programs should be able to reap some of the benefits for a few months. Governments with paid leaves report higher employee satisfaction and higher happiness ratings. I'm not entitled to be paid, but for as much as I pay in taxes, they should be able to help me out for a few months.

Agreed

minivanmafia

My personal experience has been this... with my first I waited tables so I had to go back to work 2 weeks after giving birth. I was 21 so I had bounced back fairly well. It sucked, I didnt like it but I didnt have a choice. With the second (and littlest) I took as much time as I could, 12 weeks. It was unpaid but I saved up, had short term disability through AFLAC that I used. I remember the night before the 6 week mark telling my husband, "if I had to go back to work tomorrow I would just die." We had no routine, I was exhausted and still hormonal I think. However, by 7 weeks, we had fallen into some routine. It was like overnight.. so by time 12 weeks hit I was good to go. This time I plan to go back to work part time, so I will probably only take 7-8 weeks. I think you should do what you feel is best for you and your baby, you wont get this time back and adjusting to motherhood isnt easy. I dont care if its your first, second or third. There is always a learnig curve. I know sometimes things happen that is not in our control but If you can, I would take as much time as you can allow.

ecmb

I work for a big corporation in the U.S. so I get 12 weeks paid maternity leave. I know this is not the norm though.

FMLA is only for employees of companies with 50 employees or more, who have worked there at least 12 months and who have a minimum of 1250 hours worked during those 12 months.

kayjay44

RMLandy said:

Unemployment is for those who have lost their job and cannot find new employment through no fault of their own. Not for people who choose to quit and/or take time off.

I also know for a fact that people abuse the system and don't look for a new job as they are supposed to. That money could easily go to helping fund paid maternity leave.

Regardless, we as a society should be doing whatever we can to support them members of that society. That includes parents and children.

And dads/partners should totally get leave too. 

camusoh2011

I am lucky enough to be graduating college in December and plan to continue to substitute teach after that for as long as I feel comfortable. I think when baby comes I'll use that time to work on my resume to try and get a teaching position for the next year and just hang out with my kids for the 5-6 months until the next school year starts.

Hthrette

she is not covered under FMLA if she has not been there for at least 12 months or worked at least 1250 hours.

Hthrette

Here is the thing, most employers avoid discriminating against pregnancy. So most likely, even though you aren't protected under FMLA ( I'm not sure what state you're in, you may qualify for protection under PDL if  you're in CA), usually employers still honor the 6 weeks ( 8 if you have a c section). Good luck!

g8trkim

I'm a teacher and due 2/5. What I would really love to do is take the second half of the school year off so when I go back in August baby will be 6 months old. My principal is not going to be happy. She expects everyone to take the minimum 6 weeks and gets mad if you take more. FMLA is 12 weeks off so I'm doing that. I will get paid about 3/4 of my paycheck for 6 weeks through short term disability, plus I have a few weeks of PTO so financially we will be fine. I'm going to have to drive up to the school twice a day anyway because my son goes there and my daughter's daycare is down the road. I will go back to work for 6 weeks then have off the summer. 

smilla47

Here in Denmark (Europe) we get 1 year off with 6 month paycheck and the last 6 month we get money from the state(lower than paycheck but its ok). I think im living in a very nice country;-)

Jilly82

g8trkim said:

I'm a teacher and due 2/5. What I would really love to do is take the second half of the school year off so when I go back in August baby will be 6 months old. My principal is not going to be happy. She expects everyone to take the minimum 6 weeks and gets mad if you take more. FMLA is 12 weeks off so I'm doing that. I will get paid about 3/4 of my paycheck for 6 weeks through short term disability, plus I have a few weeks of PTO so financially we will be fine. I'm going to have to drive up to the school twice a day anyway because my son goes there and my daughter's daycare is down the road. I will go back to work for 6 weeks then have off the summer. 

I am a teacher too and there is no way I would take leave based on what my Principal wanted me to do.  You should take the leave you want to!

inomniaparatus

I'm not a teacher but have a similar-ish situation where after my 3 months off through fmla I'll almost be going directly into a 3 month hiatus we have every year. As you know, from watching tv, there arent new episodes in the summer so we stop working in May, go on unemployment, then start up again in late July. My insurance continues throughout the break but I do rely on unemployment. I'm wondering if going on unemployment directly after fmla will be an issue next year. I'll have to look into it.