How are you all doing? After not getting her to latch at all in the last few days of vacation (with or without the shield) we've had some improvement here at home. One day she latched with the shield and ate for about 10 minutes, swallowing the whole time which made me happy! The next day I got her to latch on both sides with the shield without crying or fighting me. I don't think she got much but I was so happy she didn't just reject me. I still only have time for a few nursing sessions a day...either because of my toddler needing me or me needing to pump because LO and I are out of sync, or LO is too hungry and frustrated and we need to go to the bottle. My LC said try not to let her get frustrated at the breast. Keep her loving the breast, even if not feeding, so we're doing lots of skin to skin. My LC still assures me her mouths just needs to get bigger. We're just not where I thought we would be at 5.5 weeks. Trying to stay positive and realize I'm lucky to have a healthy baby and that I have milk to give her. Hope you are all doing well!! Good milky vibes to all of you!
I'm still doing 50%-50% or 60%-40% or 40%-60% nursing-pumping, and still seeing improvement but once again in baby steps. We no longer use the shield, and he latches on almost perfectly almost all the time. HOWEVER, he now takes 5-10 sips at the breast and then *Freaks* out, needs to stop, catch his breath and be burped, and then he freaks out again realizing he's no longer at the breast. This sometimes leads to him getting so worked up that I have to stop the feeding and rock him or otherwise distract him before we can get back down to business... I'm really hoping this resolves soon too! It's painful watching him wailing as he does... My LC also said not to let him get frustrated at the breast @Lbug09!
I'm like 98% EPing. It's just easier this way. She latches sometimes without the shield and other times she refuses to latch unless I have the shield. This thread today was just the motivation I need to try again tomorrow as I've taken the past few days off.
I'm still doing 50%-50% or 60%-40% or 40%-60% nursing-pumping, and still seeing improvement but once again in baby steps. We no longer use the shield, and he latches on almost perfectly almost all the time. HOWEVER, he now takes 5-10 sips at the breast and then *Freaks* out, needs to stop, catch his breath and be burped, and then he freaks out again realizing he's no longer at the breast. This sometimes leads to him getting so worked up that I have to stop the feeding and rock him or otherwise distract him before we can get back down to business... I'm really hoping this resolves soon too! It's painful watching him wailing as he does... My LC also said not to let him get frustrated at the breast @Lbug09!
That's amazing that he latches great every time without the shield! Definitely an amazing sign!! I'm sure it's going to just keep getting better! Maybe the freak out thing is just a phase. One thing I learned from my first baby is they go through so many phases that always seem like they'll last forever when you're in them, but then one day they just grow out of it! But I know it's so hard to see them cry. I hope it resolved soon. You're doing great, mama!
How's everyone doing? I'm still primarily pumping as LO does not transfer a full feeding when she nurses. We successfully got off of the nipple shield (yay!).
Awesome on the nipple shield, @ldmw. She will get better and better at transferring.
I'm not at a full feed yet either, but almost! I still pump 3-4 times a day to supplement him a bit (8oz a day or so comes from bottle fed BM), and also to build a freezer stash. I travel for work so I have no doubt there will be at least a week when I'll be away during his first six months. I'd prefer to have him travel with me, but that may not be possible.
We are breastfeeding MUCH better, but I have a new problem: my son seems to be only happy at the beginning, when my breasts are very full. When they are half-way empty, he starts to pull off and cry. I can usually get him to latch on one more time and suck a bit more, but then it seems his patience wears thin and he wants the bottle. I'm not sure how to best deal with this...
We're not doing so well these last few days. I'm pretty much exclusively pumping. I do lots of skin to skin and try to get her to latch a few times a day. She won't latch without a shield and with the shield she only sucks a few times and pulls away. I don't want her to get frustrated so when she starts breathing faster and moving her arms to push away, I stop, because I know a cry is coming. I'm feeling pretty defeated because she's 6 weeks now.
Glad to hear things are going better for you @marijaa333 and sorry to hear things are not going well for you @lbug09.
I need some support. After working so damn hard for 11 weeks I am ready to call it quits. I know not to quit on a bad day, so I'm not. I feel like a human cow. I'm sick of pumping for 5-6 hours a day! I finally got my supply to barely be enough each day for what she needs, but the downside is that it takes me 5-6 hours of pumping to get that much. Seems like it's taking way too much of my time.
@ldmw I'm sorry I didn't respond sooner. I completely understand your desire to quit. The truth is, if you do, it will be OK. But if you want to stick it out, think about whether you can make some smaller adjustments that would make your life easier.
After I got to "full supply" it took another 3 weeks to actually get comfortable nursing for both of us. We're nearly 100% bottle free now, although I still pump twice a day and give him a bottle before bedtime because it's just faster than his still somewhat inefficient grazing.
@marijaa333 I'm doing much better today. I pumped exclusively yesterday and had a record high day and made exactly how much my LO eats in a day. Funny how that works. Monday I want to quit and Tuesday I relax a little bit and have a great day.
I've been nursing again today and she's transferring half of what she eats. So that's progress. I go back to work soon and know we won't ever be 100% at the breast and likely won't ever be 25% at breast. That's okay by me. I would love to just have 1-2 times a day where she nurses and gets a full feeding.
@ldmw that is awesome progress! you'll see, it'll be just up and up from here.
I purchased a Spectra S1 pump and last night I pumped 10 (10!!!) oz in 40 minutes, where it used to take me 60 minutes to get 5oz a month ago...
Today I haven't pumped at all but probably will around midnight... It can happen for you too, but if it doesn't that's still ok. I think the key is to relax as you say. Not always easy, I know!
Well, here we are, the S1 and me at 11:53pm... I still have trouble letting down to a pump but once it happens, it's all much faster. The one thing that is not better is that the valves get "stuck" so I have to manually break the suction to let the milk into the bottle, if that makes sense. But I'm using my Medela parts, so I can't complain too much...
How did you hack your S1 to use Medela parts? I'm wanting to use my Medela parts too since I have already invested so much into them and have multiple sets.
How are you manually breaking suction to get milk into bottle?
@ldmw I just plugged the Medela tubing right into the S1. That makes it an open system but I don't care.
You can break the suction either by pulling the flanges away from your skin, or by disconnecting the tubing at the flange connection point. I may just need to change my membranes, though. It wasn't happening during the first few days and my membranes are nearly two months old at this point (with heavy use).
I've heard of the spectra and that it's pretty good. I heard about it on this Facebook group called breast bottle and beyond. There's a closed group that's a support group. It's been amazing support for me. What pumps were you guys using before? Medela pump in style? We are still not doing well. I'm exclusively pumping. Try to get her to nurse every day but she doesn't want to latch anymore. I'm holding hope that if I keep trying everyday maybe she'll change her mind. I'm using a nipple shield so it's similar to the bottle and using an SNS to try to give her instant reward but today she wouldn't even suck once tor get it. I feel like I shouldn't have listened to the LC and shouldn't have started the dr brown's botles. Just introducing them messed us up I think. If I had used the SNS back in the beginning then she could have gotten her calories at the breast. I hate having regret and looking back so I'm trying not to but it's hard. I'm not giving up though. If I have to exclusively pump I will but I'm not giving up on nursing. It was only last week that she still latched with the shield!
@marijaa333 I was planning on plugging my medela tubes directly into spectra also. I don't care if it's an open system, but then someone on Facebook said I would lose the vibrating power of the spectra back flow piece. What do you think? It doesn't see logical to me that the backflow piece would vibrate but I haven't received my S1 yet.
@Lbug09 I was using a Medlea PISA and am currently renting a Medela Lactina Select. Anxiously awaiting my Spectra. I'm so sorry nursing is not going better for you. Hang in there and keep trying if that's what you want. The regret is so hard, but try to remember at each point you are and we're doing what you knew was best.
@Lbug09 Oh man, I'm so sorry she isn't latching! I hope you can keep trying and she changes her mind. Is she generally more amenable to different things when she's hungrier? I know my LO would latch on if I did a head stand in the middle of the night after he's had 4-5 hours of sleep, but during the day, it all has to be "just so" for him to latch...
I was renting a hospital grade Medela Symphony before the S1. That was costing $75 so I thought the S1 was a good investment at $200. There is also the S2 which is cheaper. They are identical, except the S1 comes with a rechargeable battery, which is quite handy for long car rides and flights.
@ldmw Once again, here I sit, S1 a-pumpin'... It's most definitely vibrating despite the fact I'm using all Medela parts. I actually asked at my breast-feeding clinic and they said it was perfectly fine to use the S1 this way.
I'm so happy to have found this thread, I've been feeling so alone in this challenge until now! My lo is 12 days old and we've been having a really hard time with breastfeeding. In the hospital she did really well, but I had a lot of bleeding and the lactation consultant we saw thinks that delayed my milk coming in which caused some frustration at the breast. I've been pumping and have a full supply. I offer the breast multiple times at each feeding and she tends to suck a couple times and then lets go and gets really frustrated. I think part of the problem is her mouth is really small and my nipples are quite large. We're supplementing with 2 oz of pumped Breastmilk at each feeding by using a dropper and she's gaining well, but I hate having to pump and really want to breastfeed! I just got a nipple shield today, here's hoping that works!
@arbell615 welcome! What you describe sounds very familiar. I saw notable difference around 6 weeks and I'm now back to nursing 95% of the time. It's possible, but I won't lie, it's tough and time consuming to pump, nurse and supplement...!
Oh yes $200 isn't bad for the S1. And thanks for explaining the difference between the S1 and the S2, I was wondering. Sounds like the S1 would definitely be better for me, a battery pack would be so much easier! @arbell615 welcome! My recommendation to you would be to try the SNS! It will help with your LO not getting frustrated because they'll get a reward! It's really not that hard to use and you can wean off of it. At least in my experience, my LO got used to bottles and I wish I kept her at the breast with my expressed milk in the SNS to make sure she got a full feed. I would offer the breast but eventually she started refusing me because she knew the bottle was more efficient. Even though we use a preemie nipple and do paced feeding.
We've transitioned to mostly nursing, but now I'm trying to plan what to do when I go back to work. I express or pump about an extra 5oz overnight and have been freezing those but I have no idea what I'll be able to pump for missed feedings during the day...
Our biggest problem now is that he still eats every 1-1.5 hours and it doesn't matter whether I nurse or give a bottle. Not really sure what to do about that one...
Our second biggest problem is that he wakes up 3-4 times each night. All of this is a piece of cake compared to 5-6 weeks ago, though, so I'm not complaining.
On another note, I got carpal tunnel from holding his head in cross-cradle while nursing. The "miracle" of breastfeeding continues...
@marijaa333 so glad you are back to nursing. That's great! Hopefully going back to work is a decent transition for you.
I am actually having a really bad day. We we're nursing once a day up until I went to work a few weeks ago. I was fine with once a day but ever since she started daycare she has refused the breast (except once). I keep trying every once in awhile but it's so heartbreaking for her to refuse.
I am now so upset because I just found out we are underfeeding her. We feed on demand and give her as much as she will eat. We make sure she receives the minimum daily that our pediatrician recommended. Well, apparently that is all wrong and it shows as she hasn't gained weight for a few weeks. The minimum our pediatrician said is actually 6-8 ounces less than another one just told us. I feel terrible. I'm trying to do everything right and I thought I was based on our pediatrician and my research, but apparently I was still wrong. I feel awful. So now we are back to pumped breast milk and supplementing with formula. I can't get over the guilt I feel.
So sorry to hear about your struggles with weight gain @ldmw but know that you've been doing absolutely everything you can for your baby.
We've actually been doing really well here. I'm lucky enough to be able to stay at home with my LO for at least a few months and so I've really dedicated my days to breastfeeding. After 4 meetings with lactation consultants and at least twice as many phone calls we're doing it! She's off the nipple shield and nursing on her own. At her 1 month appointment the pediatrician was really happy with her weight gain. The first 2 1/2-3 weeks were so hard and I almost gave up multiple times, but now I'm so happy we stuck with it.
I hope you ladies have great support at home and in your community, that was essential for me keeping any kind of positive attitude through all of this.
@ldmw please don't feel guilty! this is not in any way your fault, in the same way that my kid's tongue tie wasn't my fault. You are doing the very best you can for your kid: being vigilant and supplementing when it's needed. Your LO will be just as well off as all the other kids, breastfed or FF.
@arbell615 I remember that phase of dedicating days to breastfeeding. These days I can go for two walks with him... so it gets better! :-)
Thanks ladies. It was just a growth spurt and the doctor said she was and is fine. The darn scale was broken causing us to freak out over nothing. Aye aye aye!
I'm back at work, so after a few great months of mostly nursing and only pumping in the early mornings for relief, I'm back to pumping three times a day, two of which are at work.
I'm going to do my best to provide exclusive BM until he's six months (just two more months!) and then I'll drop one of the office pumping sessions, at which point I'm guessing my supply will drop to the point where I'll need to supplement, first with the frozen stash and then with formula. However, I just can't see the twice-a-day pumping to be possible long term with my work schedule.
We're back to exclusively pumping. I went back to work 6 weeks ago and she stopped nursing 5 weeks ago. She completely refuses the breast. It's saddening. But I am able to maintain pumping while working full time. I pump 6-7 times a day.
@ldmw sorry to hear that she refuses to nurse, but so happy to know you're able to pump and work full time without compromising supply! Also, I suppose just having some certainty might not be a bad thing. Kudos to you for sticking with pumping!
Hi everyone! What determined loving mamas you all are! We've been doing well with breastfed but I'm going to a conference in November and will be away for almost 5 full days! Baby has taken a bottle in the past but not very well. I have a good stash in the freezer but I'm wondering 1. how do I help her get used to a bottle without replacing multiple breastfeeding sessions? 2. How much should I pump while away to ensure my supply doesn't drop? I know they say every time baby would eat, but I also know that she's more effective at getting milk than a pump! 3. Should I just bring her with me and try to manage a baby at a professional conference? (This is probably not a good idea....I just don't want to be away for so long...)
@arbell615 Re 1. my husband's best friend's mom is the baby bottle whisperer - she has given multiple resistant babies bottles with success. Sadly, her secret is to turn on cartoons on TV while feeding the baby, but hey, if that's the only way they'll eat...
2. In my EP days, I used to pump six times a day for 45 minutes each, but I'd recommend starting with 7 or 8 pumps for 20-25 mins each and seeing how you do with that... 3. YES if you can! I am bringing mine to a conference in November, but I'm lucky that my husband can join us. I don't really care what the "professionals" think/say, but then the industry I'm in is rather family friendly.
Re: From nearly-exclusive pumping to nursing
Hope you are all doing well!! Good milky vibes to all of you!
I need some support. After working so damn hard for 11 weeks I am ready to call it quits. I know not to quit on a bad day, so I'm not. I feel like a human cow. I'm sick of pumping for 5-6 hours a day! I finally got my supply to barely be enough each day for what she needs, but the downside is that it takes me 5-6 hours of pumping to get that much. Seems like it's taking way too much of my time.
I've been nursing again today and she's transferring half of what she eats. So that's progress. I go back to work soon and know we won't ever be 100% at the breast and likely won't ever be 25% at breast. That's okay by me. I would love to just have 1-2 times a day where she nurses and gets a full feeding.
I am SO happy nursing is going so well for you!
How are you manually breaking suction to get milk into bottle?
What pumps were you guys using before? Medela pump in style?
We are still not doing well. I'm exclusively pumping. Try to get her to nurse every day but she doesn't want to latch anymore. I'm holding hope that if I keep trying everyday maybe she'll change her mind. I'm using a nipple shield so it's similar to the bottle and using an SNS to try to give her instant reward but today she wouldn't even suck once tor get it. I feel like I shouldn't have listened to the LC and shouldn't have started the dr brown's botles. Just introducing them messed us up I think. If I had used the SNS back in the beginning then she could have gotten her calories at the breast. I hate having regret and looking back so I'm trying not to but it's hard. I'm not giving up though. If I have to exclusively pump I will but I'm not giving up on nursing. It was only last week that she still latched with the shield!
@Lbug09 I was using a Medlea PISA and am currently renting a Medela Lactina Select. Anxiously awaiting my Spectra. I'm so sorry nursing is not going better for you. Hang in there and keep trying if that's what you want. The regret is so hard, but try to remember at each point you are and we're doing what you knew was best.
My lo is 12 days old and we've been having a really hard time with breastfeeding. In the hospital she did really well, but I had a lot of bleeding and the lactation consultant we saw thinks that delayed my milk coming in which caused some frustration at the breast. I've been pumping and have a full supply. I offer the breast multiple times at each feeding and she tends to suck a couple times and then lets go and gets really frustrated. I think part of the problem is her mouth is really small and my nipples are quite large. We're supplementing with 2 oz of pumped Breastmilk at each feeding by using a dropper and she's gaining well, but I hate having to pump and really want to breastfeed! I just got a nipple shield today, here's hoping that works!
@arbell615 welcome! My recommendation to you would be to try the SNS! It will help with your LO not getting frustrated because they'll get a reward! It's really not that hard to use and you can wean off of it. At least in my experience, my LO got used to bottles and I wish I kept her at the breast with my expressed milk in the SNS to make sure she got a full feed. I would offer the breast but eventually she started refusing me because she knew the bottle was more efficient. Even though we use a preemie nipple and do paced feeding.
I am actually having a really bad day. We we're nursing once a day up until I went to work a few weeks ago. I was fine with once a day but ever since she started daycare she has refused the breast (except once). I keep trying every once in awhile but it's so heartbreaking for her to refuse.
I am now so upset because I just found out we are underfeeding her. We feed on demand and give her as much as she will eat. We make sure she receives the minimum daily that our pediatrician recommended. Well, apparently that is all wrong and it shows as she hasn't gained weight for a few weeks. The minimum our pediatrician said is actually 6-8 ounces less than another one just told us. I feel terrible. I'm trying to do everything right and I thought I was based on our pediatrician and my research, but apparently I was still wrong. I feel awful. So now we are back to pumped breast milk and supplementing with formula. I can't get over the guilt I feel.
We've actually been doing really well here. I'm lucky enough to be able to stay at home with my LO for at least a few months and so I've really dedicated my days to breastfeeding. After 4 meetings with lactation consultants and at least twice as many phone calls we're doing it! She's off the nipple shield and nursing on her own. At her 1 month appointment the pediatrician was really happy with her weight gain. The first 2 1/2-3 weeks were so hard and I almost gave up multiple times, but now I'm so happy we stuck with it.
I hope you ladies have great support at home and in your community, that was essential for me keeping any kind of positive attitude through all of this.