Reaching out for support *CPs mentioned*

mandielea2002

Hello everyone!  I have been a long time stalker but this is my first time posting.  I'm really not sure where to start but I wanted to reach out to you all for some insight and support.  When I try to talk to family and friends about what I've been going though, it seems like they don't know what to say and that I'm making them uncomfortable.  Here's my story:

DH and I started TTC in January.  I had been off of the pill for over a year and my cycles were very regular.  We got pregnant on the first try and were we excited but it ended in a CP 5 days after finding out.  In February, no success.  In March I began using fertility friend and charting my BBT among other signs and I got pregnant again.  This time I went to my GP for testing and found out that my HCG was 9 and my progesterone was 1.4.  Sure enough, 4 days later I miscarried.  In April, I had a 7dpo progesterone level drawn and it was 7 so she started me on a compounded progesterone 9% vaginal cream (was waaay cheaper than crinone) to be used during the luteal phase but I started it pretty late at 9dpo.  I had to stop it at cd 30 to get my period to start after several BFNs.   In May I consulted with a OB that a friend with infertility issues referred me to.  He said that while he wasn't sure about the effectiveness of progesterone supplements, I should continue using it and he had high hopes for us since I got PG so easily and also suggested I start baby asprin (which I was already doing).  That's the month that things got wonky with my cycle.  I never got a postive on a OPK (which I did the months prior)  and my BBT never showed a major or sustained thermal shift.  My 21day progesterone level was only 2.1.  Also, I started my period on cd 30 even though I was still on the progesterone.  This month (June) I was set to ovulate last Saturday and even got a postive OPK a few days prior but here it is Tuesday and have yet to see a rise in BBT which leads me to believe that I haven't ovulated and won't again this month.  

I'm just so frustrated!  How can I have gone from a fairly normal cycle but now I'm suddenly not ovulating!  Did the progesterone cream create the problem with ovulation even though I'm only using it during the luteal phase?  Is the stress of TTC to blame?  Has anyone else ever gone though this before?  

I am trying to learn to deal with this fairly new problem in my life without it bringing me down.  My newsfeed on facebook is filled with baby pictures from friends and coworkers.  While I'm happy for them, it brings me a pain I've never experienced before.  I can't help but to wonder if God is telling me "No, stop this isn't for you"  Or "No now is not the time but keep trying"  

Anyways, thanks for reading and please feel free to lend me words of encouragement or understanding.  I sure could use them right now.    

EDIT:  I just heard back from my OB and he wants me to try clomid 50mg next month.  

Oh and BTW, Im new to forum posting and wasn't sure how to link my FF charts but here's a try at it if anyone is interested <a href="https://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/59b1f5">My Ovulation Chart</a> 

przemosbabe

Well the good thing for you is you know that sperm is meeting the egg. So you know that isn't the problem. It very well could have been the low progesterone, or it could be a much deeper problem that I don't think you should worry about at this time, so I won't mention it. It is normal for some women to have some cycles where they don't ovulate. I feel like you will eventually have success since sperm and egg are meeting for you. I don't think god is telling you it's not your time . You need to take action to get what you want and you are doing just that. Keep us updated on your clomid cycle. I'm excited for you.

WhiskyandWhiskers

@Mandiel, I am in the same boat. I've had 3 chemicals and one loss at 9 weeks from triplody. My RE wants me to do IVF with ICSI and PGD, as she feels it is the best option for me. I have not had repeat pregnancy loss labs, or chromosome studies on myself or my husband. I'm trying clomid 100 mg with an IUI. Hoping it's an easy egg issue and not some genetic problem. I too, feel like its God telling me to slow down, or something. Who knows, I take comfort in believing that I will have children, it's just taking longer than expected. 

I'm a labor and delivery nurse. Some days I'm like WTF cruel universe. I try to keep busy and I'm going back to school. I'm also thinking of getting another puppy so that'll keep my mind at bay. 

I'm sorry you're going through this.

mandielea2002

Thanks guys!  I really appreciate the encouragement :-)    

Oh and @whiskeyandwhiskers, I thank God for my fur-babies!    I'm a Registered Vet Tech so I get puppy therapy on a daily basis!