Daycare Freakout

inomniaparatus

so I just moved to a new building and there is a daycare/pre-school in the building (not affiliated with the building but you get to it by walking around to another entrance of my apt. Building). Had lunch with my friend from the area and she told me there is a 24+ month waiting list ... She even has friends on the list that aren't even pregnant yet! But, I'm less concerned with that (because I think you get moved up once you actually have a real, live baby)... I'm more concerned with the fact that it cost 2k/month.

I know nanny shares are similar ... I just moved to this building because it saves me 700/ month in rent (yes it's 700 LESS than I was paying before) but I just worry that with the daycare costs I'll never be able to get ahead. We moved here so we could actually start saving for a house instead of throwing away what's the equivalent to a 800k mortgage every month in rent.

Uggh rant over. Anyone else freaking out about daycare/nanny costs??

Jilly82

Luckily, the daycare that my son goes to is pretty reasonable.  2000 a month sounds crazy to me

Jmsmith102

Yes. My husband and I can't decide if it's even worth it for both of us to work! It's almost like one of our whole salaries will go to daycare. I also am very sad that I could miss so many firsts as this would be our first little one....I
Wish I had family closer to help out.

inomniaparatus

I won't need the daycare until they are about 7-8 months old because I can spend the first 6 months home and my mom is off for another month after that (I work in TV where I'll have a 3 month hiatus we have every year but it will luckily follow my 3 months maternity leave and my mom is a psychologist in a school who's off in summers). So I'm happy about that because I feel like those 7-8 months are most important in forming attachment.

But I'd definitely still need my salary. It's expensive but doesn't come close to being financially worth it to stay home.

LMMama

2000 seems a little outrageous. I just wouldn't use something that costs that much money. I think an average for an infant is 800 to 1000 around me. I only pay $520 for my 3 year old now. And still it's hard for me to turn that over every month.

inomniaparatus

I heard there is another in the area that is about 1500 because they're new and have introductory rates but I'm not sure if that will still be the case next year- prob not

I just moved from Manhattan to Jersey City so it makes sense that prices here are more than most areas - I just wasn't expecting 2k/month

jennpar21

Wow!!!! I am glad I don't live in the city, although I am sure wages are more so in turn its more affordable. I thought $500/month was high, which actually is a little more then most places around where I live.

Twindling

I would look at some registered in homes. FWIW, I run an in home daycare and it kills me to hear parents that the $400/mo they spend is a lot. Come tax time, when I add it all up (my light bills, air/heat, internet, supplies, toys, water bill, garbage, FOOD) I make ZERO profit. My daycare parents pay my bills and I take home nothing extra for myself. It's just the price I'm willing to pay to stay home with my own kids

sheslikeasunburn

I live in NYC and this is a very standard rate for high quality daycare.  I will be hiring a nanny because it's comparable in cost and I need coverage very early and very late, depending on the week.  Similar to you, it is no where near the the amount I make by working.

You can look into registered home daycares, which may be less.  I know they tend to have more flexible hours which is a plus.

ACleanLife24

DH is completely.... his family is a couple of hours north and mine is across an ocean so it will fall on just us...

Planning on hopefully coming to some part time/work at home arrangement with school so I only have to DC 2-3 days a week... even then its scary.  For me to put my baby in full time nursery would be my entire paycheck!

CuriousKiddosMama

Good daycare is expensive. We live in a low cost of living area and it is still a lot. A good daycare around here (talking to my neighbors) is $800 for 3 days a week! We are putting ds in a mommies day out program this fall and it's about 2 half days a week for $200. That is a church based program which is part of the reason it is so reasonable. They aren't looking to make $, just cover their costs. Infant daycare is more expensive because by most state laws the child to adult ratio is much lower than for 1 year plus. In Texas it's a 4:1 ratio for newborns versus 8 or 12:1. (I haven't worked daycare in a while so I can't remember exactly) but that is probably part of the reason the first year is so high. Does it go down after that? Most around here charge less for older kids.

Side note: hop over to the money matters board on the nest. Those ladies can help look at budgets and give suggestions. A lot of us are working on getting out of debt, and it's a pretty supportive place to ask questions.

inomniaparatus

sheslikeasunburn said:

I live in NYC and this is a very standard rate for high quality daycare.  I will be hiring a nanny because it's comparable in cost and I need coverage very early and very late, depending on the week.  Similar to you, it is no where near the the amount I make by working.

You can look into registered home daycares, which may be less.  I know they tend to have more flexible hours which is a plus.

Yea I was considering a nanny share but I'm off for three months in the year and I don't want to have to pay someone during this time and it would be hard to retain someone when we ask them to take a three month unpaid vacation lol.
I'm not comfortable with an in-home daycare. I definitely want to be able to check in on them by using the daycare video app on my phone and I like that there is a sense of accountability since there is a whole staff.

I'll either have to suck it up and cut back majorly on eating out, taking cabs, going on vacations etc. or move closer to my mom on long island

ErinC1014

I live in philadelphia. Friends of ours pay 1500 per child for their kids to go somewhere full time. 3000 a month! It's crazy to me. My daughter and son go to a lovely, church-run play school/preschool 2 days per week for 700ish..full time would be about half of what they are paying. There are options here, but I know affordable
options may be limited elsewhere. But YES childcare costs are a doozy.

ashcody2

$2000/mo is crazy to me but I also live in the Midwest so we probably have one of the cheapest daycare rates in the US. We pay $195/week at a center (which is a lot more than an in home) we just switched since DS turned 2 and was bored there. We were paying $125/week at in home, when LO one comes along in Feb. we will sending the baby to in home and our toddler will continue at the center. 

Not sure where you work but are you eligible for a flex plan for childcare? 

bredoll

This post makes me want to throw up. The only family that we live near is my dad and he works full time and travels 2-4 days a week for his job so that is not an option. I guess I need to start looking into how much this is going to cost us. 

babypollard1

We live in a suburb of Dallas and I've heard from some friends the pricing for a good daycare and they are definitely steep for infants. Luckily my husband and I work opposite schedules and my MIL will be retiring shortly after I'm off maternity leave which will be great. However, I feel so hesitant and wish I could stick around for the first year. A good family friend owns an at home daycare and has for a decade or more now. I will say however, do your research on them before you just trust anyone. Love reading all these different situations -- helping me explore my options as well!

BabySeaTurtles

@bredoll - I live in Florida too and we paid $750/mo for DS for the infant year. It goes down as LOs get older and the child to caretaker ratio gets larger. It's 4:1 for infant rooms here, 6:1 for 1 year olds and I think it's 10:1 for twos. We pay $400-600/month depending on whether we take him 4 days or 5 days out of the week.

bredoll

@BabySeaTurtles - You are in Brevard county right? I'm guessing we would put the munchkin in either Winter Springs or Winter Park day care since we live in one and I work in the other. As long as everything is good next week at the US I will start doing research. I wish my dad would retire and be a SAHGP  

rspalding001

I live in Central CA and we pay $1450 a month. It actually works about to about $8 an hour if I do the math so not totally unreasonable, but it is expensive I agree.

spaceykatie

I live in the SF Bay Area and 2k/month is pretty typical for daycare centers here as well from what I've gathered.

Home based daycare is supposedly a bit less.

BabySeaTurtles

@bredoll -Yes, I'm in Brevard. I was thinking the prices from Brevard County to Orange County are relatively similar as compared to somewhere up north where cost of living is much higher. Trying to lift your spirits from all the higher numbers in this post... :-bd

SarahChristine12

Wow! The costs for childcare that are being mentioned is insane. I am in Minnesota and when I did have my kids in daycare (I am now a sahm) we were paying $2.50/hour for each child at a home daycare. That worked out to around $450/ month per child. I can't imagine having to pay $1000-$2000/month.

nosleeptildisney

I live in JC, as well! (Actually posted a thread asking if anyone else lived in the area). From the ones I have been researching for the area, I've come up with 800-1400, open from about 7A-6P, Monday through Friday. Still weighing the options on either staying home or returning to work. Good luck on your search!

Sprinkles07

This is why I'm a sahm! Daycare was half my income. I had gone back to work for about 3 months after ds when my husband got a big promotion that basically covered the half of my income daycare wasn't using and we decided I might as well stay home and raise our kids. With 2 kids we never would have been able to make me working worth it.

LittleLotero

I live in NC and my DD who is 5 (will be starting Kindergarten in August) goes to a 5 star rated center. It's not the priciest in town but I wanted her to be prepared for real school instead of just being "babysat". We pay $142/week. IMO, her education at his point is worth the cost since I have to work and cannot teach her myself.

kayjay44

I'm in the Seattle area. Not only are wait lists insane, but so is the cost. We will pay over $2k for 2 in daycare when this one comes. Our daycare is north of the city (where we live). If we lived in the city, it would be more like $3k or more. If we have any more, we'll get a nanny.

Infant care is $400/week (we bring our own food). Now that DD is over 1, it's $275/week and they provide all of the food.

Sprinkles07

@LittleLotero I felt the same about the educational part when ds was in daycare. It went from newborn to kindergarten. They focused on reading comprehension. I loved it! It was terrible expensive though. 220 a week. So worth it though. Honestly he probably would have learned more there than he does at home with me.

twinmom1121

I had no idea daycare was so expensive! I mean I knew it was a lot but not 2k a month! I'm a sahm because I knew we could never afford to put twins in daycare with the amount I was making at my job (retail). My sister works at a daycare here in az and said infants are about $250/week.

LittleLotero

Sprinkles07 said:

@LittleLotero I felt the same about the educational part when ds was in daycare. It went from newborn to kindergarten. They focused on reading comprehension. I loved it! It was terrible expensive though. 220 a week. So worth it though. Honestly he probably would have learned more there than he does at home with me.

And amen!

kayjay44

bredoll said:

This post makes me want to throw up. 

Amen. Just thinking about this makes me sick. Or want to cry. Half of my take home will be going to daycare next year.

g8trkim

Yeah that's crazy expensive!!! Infant care around here is close to 1K a month. Our daycare doesn't take kids until 18 months so I'm thinking about doing home daycare or a nanny this go round. I am taking the second half of the school year off so baby will be 6 months. It will only be August to June since I'm a teacher. At that point baby will be 18 months and can go to my daughter's school.

BabyHope2013

DS goes to an in-home here in the midwest (which is a little over $100/week cheaper than centers in our area). We pay $165 a week. We will get a slight discount for Baby #2--but will still be paying a decent amount more in daycare costs with two kids than we pay in our own mortgage every month. 

When DS was born I thought about staying home---but then I also saw how I have co-workers that were coming back into the field after staying at home several years at lower pay scales than what they likely left. I decided that it would not be in my best interest to leave my job for several years because I would be concerned that I would depreciate myself in value to the workforce. With my son being 2.5 now---I can say that I have continued to move up in my career already---something that if I had taken 5-6 years off to be a SAHM it would probably take me 5 or more years after getting back into my career to get where I am. 

Every mom's life is different. Sometimes I wish that I could be a SAHM to my son and other future children. But financially it makes the most sense for me to stay working full time---even if that means swallowing the expensive cost of child care for a few years. 

On a site note: Check your states government site if you need child care. Most of them have a way to search all licensed daycares (both in-homes and centers). You can see if they have had any violations or how long they have been around. 

inomniaparatus

So funny! Where in JC are you. I'm in Paulus Hook.

inomniaparatus

nosleeptildisney said:

I live in JC, as well! (Actually posted a thread asking if anyone else lived in the area). From the ones I have been researching for the area, I've come up with 800-1400, open from about 7A-6P, Monday through Friday. Still weighing the options on either staying home or returning to work. Good luck on your search!

Sorry meant to quote!

Where in JC?

I'm in Paulus Hook

inomniaparatus

And my husband nor myself could be out and home by 6pm - that's like a half day for me! I will have to start leaving earlier though. I'll just have to stop procrastinating at work

toorahloorah

2,000 a month is about average in NYC. I moved down to Florida from there but I still ended up quitting my job as a teacher here, after DD, because the cost of daycare was going to be more than half of my paycheck every month. Now with 2- I don't know what I would do.

ccolekelly

inomniaparatus said:

I live in JC, as well! (Actually posted a thread asking if anyone else lived in the area). From the ones I have been researching for the area, I've come up with 800-1400, open from about 7A-6P, Monday through Friday. Still weighing the options on either staying home or returning to work. Good luck on your search!

Sorry meant to quote! Where in JC? I'm in Paulus Hook

DH and I lived in JC for 2 years when we were first dating! We are up in the Boston area now though.

Also, I agree with @bredoll. This thread makes me sick... Very grateful DH wants to be a SAHD with our LO.

northstar13

magnumJ said:

bredoll said:

This post makes me want to throw up. 

Amen. Just thinking about this makes me sick. Or want to cry. Half of my take home will be going to daycare next year.

Me too. I'm not reading the rest of this thread because it's making me panic.

nosleeptildisney

I live in the Journal Square area, but I'm fairly close to Grove Street, as well. Paulus Hook is not far at all!

Same situation here with work. I usually get out around 8P (on a good day). DH's schedule changes since he works for Port Authority and who knows what shift he'd be on!

What hospitals are you looking at to birth in?

Unknown

This content has been removed.

name1109

Those are pretty standard costs and wait lists time frames for here in the DC area or atleast when I was looking last.  You might look for a Nanny and see if you can work out an arrangement for the 3 months (you might not need a retainer?).  We used a Nanny share but at the end of the day she was only available for 8 hours which was tough given my 1-2 hour one way commute at the time.  I think if you research Nanny's you might be surprised.  (I did not do alot of research for Nanny's at the time.  I had been on a wait list forever and then right when I had her, the daycare center we were confirmed to go to...stopped taking new babies and we had not popped for other daycare facilities yet.....so our Nanny was available and decent so we took her up.) I also had friends who paid as "little" as $1300 in a share.  Another option is the Au Pair route.  https://www.aupairinamerica.com/  

The other fun part of having a Nanny are the taxes....as in paying them and filing them as an employer....