Breastfeeding vs. Bottle feeding

Gingermom15

spottedginger said:

I'm still waiting on a link to the study proving that there are miniature razors in formula.

It's all a conspiracy formulated by the government for citizen control, man.

fiorip

I find it interesting how most people here would agree that choosing wether or not to breastfeed is a personal choice and even though it's what's best most of the time, people who choose not to breastfeed shouldn't be judge yet they do shame, judge and bring down people who feel bad for being momentarily disappointed by the sex of their child.

How is it any different saying "I won't breastfeed just because I don't want to even though it's better" and being applauded for your choice than saying "I'm a little sad that my baby isn't male/female even though is healthy" and being trashed for it?

As I am catching up on old threads, I'm just wondering how people can be selectively judgmental on hot topics. I guess the way I see it, we shouldn't shame or judge either one.

Just to clarify, I agree breast feeding isn't for everyone and no one should be judged for not trying. I just would like to hear an opinion from someone who agrees on the bf and shames the disappointed mom. Why do you feel is different?

BTW, the thing about formula making incisions and causing pain? Totally true if you're feeding your child Acid, that's just nonsense.

duckinoven

@fiorip interesting point. In my mind, sex of the baby is a gamble unless you are doing IVF for a specific sex. It's a 50/50 shot of boy/girl and we all know these odds. So it's hard to understand why someone is disappointed when they chose to conceive a baby regardless of sex. Breastfeeding vs pump/bottle vs formula feeding is entirely a choice of the mother (and her family).

To sum it up, having preference for one sex is not a choice we get to make (without IVF) but how we feed our children is a choice we can control.

fiorip

@duckinoven that's a valid point, I agree you don't get to choose and it's a 50/50 chance. I get people shouldn't expect a certain sex unless, as you said, you actually pick a sex through IVF. I still don't think it's right to judge someone who had an expectation though. To me it feels like telling someone who complains about having a car they don't like, not to complain because at least you have a car or saying you don't like a meal and having someone tell you at least you are able to eat, many people don't get that luxury everyday. I guess the way I see it, everyone's struggles are different.

duckinoven

@fiorip it's interesting hearing different perspectives. I've said this on a few of the "sex disappointment" threads, I think it's normal for some folks to be a little let down, especially in situations where it's their last baby and they had big hopes for one sex. But 99% of the time that passes within hours/days. Also, in cases where the sex has impact on a medical issue (carrier, etc) it makes sense to have a strong preference for one sex.

My point has always been that the topic never goes well in this group and I find it more appropriate to air that disappointment in private, with your partner, family, and friends, who likely will be more understanding and sympathetic. It's about knowing your audience.

fiorip

@duckinoven I guess that's true too. I had a miscarriage and I'm personally not offended by those type of posts but I guess I can see why someone would feel bad.

ChiccoBeanz

I'm just wondering, may be a silly question, in the event a mother cannot breastfeed, can't she pump and feed her child breast milk via bottle? Or are there situations that prevents that as well? I'm an FYI in the making (God willing this dec) and I'm a little ignorant to this. Someone clue me in please.

Gingermom15

It depends on the reason for the mother not being able to breastfeed. In the event of the mother needing medication that can be passed to baby from breastmilk, she wouldn't be able to pump. Sometimes thyroid and metabolism problems can dry up the supply, which is what happened with my sister in law. She struggled with her supply until her baby was 8 months and supplemented with formula since birth. Come to find out, she had hypothyroidism that was preventing her from having a well established supply. At 9 months her supply has completely dried up, partially due to the medications she has to take.

ETA if the baby is having issues latching or the mom has issues with the baby nursing (sometimes emotional from sexual assault) and nothing is wrong her her supply and no meds that make the milk unsuitable, then pumping could be an option. But it is hard to establish a good supply solely with a pump.

fiorip

@ChiccoBeanz exactly what @sarahgn said. A number of things would determined wether it's possible to do that or not. Do you have a specific situation you want to know about?

ChiccoBeanz

@fiorip no not in particular. I was just a little confused when people got into the debate. I always thought that bottle feeding still gave mothers the options to still give their children breast milk. But I also understand that with some children, breast milk isn't an option, which is okay too.

discohiker

I read the ingredients on a can of formula and that made the decision for me. I would let you know that your nipples will get less sensitive as you stick with it. I used to be very conscious of the exposure but no one really cared and I just don't care anymore now either. I'm a BFibg momma who had two c-sections and BFing helped me bond with my sons too. Good luck!

Gingermom15

For moms who can't breastfeed, there are options other than common commercial formula if you wish to avoid them. Homemade formula, donated breastmilk and more holistic powder formula is available.
I agree. The ingredients are not something I am a fan of and if breastfeeding doesn't work for me, I intend to order European made formula such as HiPP or Holle, depending on the availability in my area.