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Cinnamon311

Hi ladies,
This board is full of so much hope. Hoping you can send some of that my way. My h and I have been married 4 yrs. we have an almost 2 yr old who is amazing. My pregnancy with her was rough to say the least though starting with bleeding in the beginning and her needing intestinal surgery at 1 day old. We knew about this from 20 weeks. I ebf and didn't have a period and the. Found out I was pregnant when she was 6 months old. Again low progesterone, but this one ended in loss at 7 ish weeks even after seeing a HB. I always thought I would want more kids, but after these experiences I'm not sure. My h definitely wants more. What made you sure you were ready to even try again after your loss. Especially if you were questioning?

Sending lots of good wishes to all of you.

carrieandr

I don't have any kids yet, so there was never a question of whether I would keep trying. And I'll be 37 on Thursday, so I wanted to try again asap. As unpleasant as all of this has been -- the miscarriage, the d&c, and all the waiting -- I tend to stay positive overall.  I've definitely got my negative moments, but I think optimism for the future is just in my nature. And I know the sooner I'm pregnant, the sooner I'll feel like all is right with the world again.

I wish I could give you a magic answer to give you hope. All I can think is maybe if you did some things that make you happy, that happiness could change your mindset a bit. Sometimes how we feel about one thing can affect how we feel about other things. Sort of like when you first start dating someone and you see the world through rose-colored glasses. Or when something bad happens at work and every little thing starts to annoy you.

Good luck!  I'm sending hope your way.

bntfroggie

I just wanted to stop in and say Hi!

Like CarrieandRoy I do not have any children yet and even going through all of this I know that the end far outweighs this inbetween part.  I think this may be a conversation you need to have with DH.  Explain to him that you are scared and it has taken a lot out of you.  Maybe you could agree to wait a certain time (like 6mos) without trying and then come back and visit it again.  I'm not sure how fresh your loss is (I understand it is always an open wound), but I think with time maybe you'll be at the place you want to be at, whatever you end up choosing.  Good Luck and we are here for you.

spatter1

Hello! Like the others I do not have kids yet, so trying again was never a question. Hopefully some of the ladies on here who have children can chime in with their experiences. Good luck and sending lots of positivity your way! 

MamaBish

Honestly, I'm not 100% sure we are ready to try again, however, we are 100% sure we want to raise a living child. Our loss was late (28 weeks) and it's super scary to try again, but we definitely want a living child so after lots of discussions between the two of us and our therapist, we've decided to start. There's really no right answer.

MayBeSomeDay16

I have one DD who is 18 mths. I had a mc in early April and immediately wanted to try again. My DH and i talked and we just know in our hearts our family is not complete yet. I remind myself almost daily that MCs happen sadly, quite often and ladies continue on to have perfectly healthy pregnancies afterwards. 

Cinnamon311

Thank you all! It's been a year since the loss. I think if I was ready to try when it happened, I might have been more open to trying again. When I got pregnant I had an infant, and had just started a new job which I would have qualified for leave from, so I spent the entire time worryjng about that stuff and not being happy. I was only finally getting used to the idea when it was all taken away.