new here, ft working mother with 7 month dd

eserkin

I am a full time working mother who has a 7 month old in full time day care and dh who works full time an hour away from home and has an extra curricular a few times a week at night. We have been making most things work including open conversation, but the issue comes to be chores and sex. I still am bf and have to pump at 5am, 2x during day and sometimes at 6 pm, and then again before bed at 10. She gets actually nursed 1-2 day during week. I have a low supply. Dh is now talking about stopping bf so I can go back to having a sex drive and enjoy it. He says he can tell the difference. We have sex 1-2 month currently (was trying for 1x week but daycare germs have left both of us suck often). I know I don't have any sex drive and still do the majority of the caretaking and housework. Anyone else having issues? Is my sex drive just taking that much longer to come back? Thoughts?

rspalding001

I think what you are going through is normal. And I totally get the being sick from day care germs and not feeling very sexy because of that. Breastfeeding is hard, especially when you are pumping the majority of the time. Id say you just need to evaluate how important it is for you to keep it up and for how long you want to do that. We BF until 10 months then switched to formula. I will warn you however that after we stopped breast milk my DD DID start getting colds on a more frequent basis so just be prepared for that if you do decide to stop. Also, you can try supplementing with formula and just decreasing the amount of breast milk you need to pump each day. When we transitioned we started by just adding a little formula to her BM bottle and slowly upping the amount until it was 50% BM 50% Formula. We stayed at 50/50 until my freezer stash ran out. 7 months is a long time to make it breast feeding :-) no matter what you have done a great job and don't feel bad if you decide its the tiem to make a change

CarrieB.

Tell your DH to back off. BF'ing is temporary. You should do it as long as you and baby want to. Plus stopping BF'ing doesn't mean that baby will sleep through the night. I've equated sleeping through the night as a higher indicator of my own sex drive. I'm still nursing my 19 month old and it doesn't affect me.

eserkin

Thanks. I don't want to stop, I know how important bf is for her and the extra binding I have with her. I do get sex is a normal part of a marriage but it's not like this phase lasts forever. I don't know how else to make him understand.

marijaa333

I would explain that by picking up extra chores, you will have more energy, including for getting dressed into something other than pajamas and getting more intimate with him. A win-win?