Pregnancy after a miscarriage

Cshaffer7

I am curious if I'm the only one that is scared or feels this way.... I lost our first baby in December and I was twelve weeks along but the Dr said the baby passed at 9 weeks but I was still holding it. Needless to say I got pregnant again in March and could not be happier to be bringing our little boy into this world in November! I am 14 weeks and a few days and I am just curious if it's normal to be so paranoid? I obviously have never been full term pregnant so I don't know what is normal or to expect..... Im not showing to much yet ( I have a small bump but I am curve so you can't tell to much) and I obviously don't feel anything yet. I had my last appt at 12 weeks and everything was good, all tests and heart rate have came back great. My next appt is in two weeks... but I am just wanting to know I guess basically that I am not crazy! Can anyone relate?

sswartout

I can totally relate. I am 16w1d after 3 losses last year and am always worrying. The waiting in between appointments is brutal. Best wishes for a healthy pregnancy!

twogirlsandagreen

Yes, it's totally normal. Last year I lost two babies and I am still paranoid at almost 20 weeks. My Doppler has helped me to not stress. Just 5 seconds of hearing that little heartbeat and I relax. Hang in there.

Cshaffer7

Thank you guys so much, it's made my anxiety get worse and worse and I feel horrible for my boyfriend because I am just legit always worried but thank goodness he is very patient and understanding! I really appreciate your guys kinds words. Hope your pregnancy are healthy and great as well!

shannond21228

I have 2 year old twins then went on to have 3 miscarriages. It is really hard being pregnant after losses. I agree it's really hard to wait between appointments. The more pregnant I get the more my nerves diminish especially after the first tri, hearing the heartbeat, and having ultrasounds. Good luck with your pregnancy!

SnarkasaurusRex

Totally normal. I'm sorry for your loss! TB has a whole board dedicated to pregnancy after a loss (https://forums.thebump.com/categories/success-after-a-loss), so you might be able to find more women who can related to your fears and anxieties over there!

Congratulations and good luck!!

tonilee80

I completely understand.. I had a miscarriage in 2010 at 9 weeks, then became pregnant a few months later and had a healthy baby boy (6 weeks early though).. I was paranoid the ENTIRE time... I hated being pregnant with the thought that something would go wrong inside of me.. I am now about 25 weeks pregnant 5 years later...I am just as paranoid! I'm scared to go to the bathroom and see blood on my panties.. I am scared about every little cramp.. I just want to skip the pregnant part and go right to holding my baby!!  You are most definitely not alone!

PhoenixRyuu

You're not crazy. After 6 losses I'm 20w2d and still waiting for something to go wrong. I'm constantly worried that every (sorry for the TMI) discharge is bleeding and check multiple times a day. You're getting close to where you can use a home doppler. It might help to relieve some of your fears if you can hear the baby's heartbeat whenever you want, but the work days are still tough.

Diana HM

I'm not sure if you have any spiritual beliefs, but one book that really helped me was "Praying Through Your Pregnancy" by Jennifer Polimino. My first pregnancy ended in miscarriage and I was plagued for much of my healthy second pregnancy with fear that robbed me of joy. The book has a prayer/focus for each week related to your baby's development.

Otherwise, the only other thing I would recommend is to stay off the internet when you're having fearful moments. I found that I wanted to google every single cramp or eerie pain which honestly fed worries that didn't even happen. I found it much better and more reassuring to consult my doctor with concerns instead of googling them. Best of luck!

Cshaffer7

Thank you everyone for such kind words and awesome advice! I appreciate it so much!

clrockwell78

I had twins girls in July 2014 at 20 weeks, I had two heartbeats when I got to the hospital after my water broke for no reason. I had to deliver both naturally but they were too little to survive. I thought about getting a doplar, but since I had two heartbeats on the day I lost them, I don't think that will reassure me in any way. I'm sixteen weeks now and just hoping to make it to week 21 at this point. I don't know if my anxiety will subside at all.

sparrowjones

I know exactly how your feeling. We lost our first at 9 weeks, and it took us so long to concieve this one...5 years. I am so thankful for every single moment I am pregnant with this child. I was terrified through the whole first trimester and still battle with the fears from time to time now. The only thing that's gotten me through it is honestly prayer, and resting in the peace I get from trusting that gods taking care of this all. Hoping you can find peace and enjoy your pregnancy!

palomboemily

You are not crazy, I can completely understand where you are coming from. I had a missed miscarriage last October. I am now 25 weeks pregnant, due October 12. I have been very nervous and paranoid during this pregnancy due to my past experience. My husband has been an absolute saint putting up with me and helping me through it. The best advice I have been given is to take it one day at a time and focus on being positive and hopeful. It's what best for you and baby. Good luck I wish you all the best!

eish22

I can relate. I have been paranoid constantly through this pregnancy so far. I'm 14+1 today. I've had 2 ultrasounds, one at 11 weeks in the hospital that showed a super healthy (and mobile) baby with hb of 166, then another at 12+6 at a doctors appointment with hb of 169. Those made me feel great for a few days but as the days go on I'm super anxious and paranoid that something is wrong again! I drive my husband insane although he's supportive of my worries. I had a miscarriage 5 years ago at 6 weeks. I don't know how to kick this fear, especially since I'm in my second trimester now and the chances of something going wrong are so low. I want to get over this and enjoy my pregnancy. But I'm too paranoid to plan for anything! I haven't even bought maternity clothes even though my pants don't fit, for fear that something will go wrong. I'm so happy and excited about this baby but I wish I could kick this feeling!

Cshaffer7

Trust me I am the same exact way! I'm now almost 19 weeks and still super worried 24/7. I started feeling flutters on Friday and it's been every day since so that has been helping me alot but I'm ready to feel the full on kicks lol call me crazy but I think besides ultrasounds that is going to be the only thing that can calm me at this point!