Anyone with 2U2 and no close family support network?

Margotsha

I have a girl that is 14mo and we are trying for a 2nd. If things work out, the 2nd will be born right around my daughters 2nd birthday. (Yeah, so not technically 2U2). My main concern is that our families live 1,500 miles away. Unfortunately after I had my 1st, I grew apart from a lot of friends due to now living very different lifestyles. In other words, we don't have a huge support network that is close by. Anyone in a similar situation have advise? Just bite the bullet, get thru the first few years and things will be easier? I'm looking for thoughts, or just encouraging words.

mattandlora

DH and I have no family in town and live in a rural area. We have a lot of close friends in the area, but it takes 30 minutes to get into town to see them.

Every day feels like a struggle just to take care of food and clothes, but I tell myself this is for a very short time in my life. Like others before us, this too shall pass.

Ours are 22 months apart.

jesselayne8

I did. My first 2 are 17 months apart and my family is about 800 miles away. They visit maybe 4x a year. The first 5 months were very hard but I love the age gap now. I was tryin to 2u2 again but this time we will have a 26 month age gap. I think it's important to find 1 or 2 good babysitters that you trust. I plan on having help during the horrible dinner, bath, and bedtime hours when #3 comes and DH is working late.

irsam

I have 6 and the first 5 were very close together one year a part I did it all while living close to family but they never helped. Now with the 6th and one more on the way living over 1000 miles away feels no different. You can do it it's about patience and remembering we once were kids and making memories with our kiddies. Don't ever forget not to allow yourself to go still take time to have pampering time and looking good

thisblessedmess

I had 4 under 4 with no close friends or family in a rural area & my husband commuted an hour each way to work. I felt very alone and overwhelmed. It is hard when you're in the midst of it and it doesn't feel like it, but it does pass quickly. (And, yes, I wanted to scream at anyone who told me to "enjoy every minute" when I was in the trenches). My advice to you (and my former self) is to ask for and accept help from friends. It is tough but you don't have to do it alone. Also, don't neglect your relationship with your husband!

xuxachi

I have 3 under 4 and my DH and I are still trying to build a support network. DH's whole family lives in Romania so they cannot help. My parents live in WI (I'm in NY) but I do have a sister nearby (who has her own young family) and brother somewhat close, so we are not completely without. We are new to the area and don't have longstanding friendships. My closest friends live in another part of the country. It's taking a long time to develop friendships- everyone still feels like acquaintances. But it's getting better and with my DS in preschool we are meeting more families with young kids.

somewhereinafrica

I'm 7,000 miles away from my relatives!
I will have 2 under 1 and will only have friends near by although I am fortunate to have a nanny to help.
If family wants to visit its 2 big flights and then a small internal flight!

I'm lucky in the sense that people are very willing to be helpful and pitch in!

delg23

I think it is pretty hard not having a support system. I had none. But I moved back to my home state because I was losing it. It was still hard. Having 2 close is just hard no matter what (in my opninion). If you can afford a sitter to give you a break once in a while that would help a lot! It gets easier when the oldest is around 4. But even still it is hard sometimes. For example my youngest still takes a nap but my oldest doesn't want to be quiet for him. When they are both out of car seats, sippies, etc then it will be easier! I think! The nice thing is they enjoy playing together a lot.