Intro/Early miscarriage how long did you wait to try

KadzoKimbia

i just found out I am miscarrying at 6 weeks. I have 2 boys already and was hoping we would be having our third this December but no dice. But don't want to wait long to ttc again! I am just wondering how long everyone waited?

I had an early miscarriage before my first baby but it was a much faster process than this one seems to be.

(I am just trying to rationalize everything and move on. I know it can seem cold, but my husband and I believe that because there must have been an issue with the embryo it wasn't meant to be.)

tigerfish227

In sorry for your loss. I have a few pieces of advice to give you.

1: other people's experiences have no bearing on you. Everyone's circumstances are unique. Only your doctor can tell you when you should start trying again because he/she knows your history and circumstances. Woke it may be safe for one woman to try again pretty quickly, another may need to wait a while. Listen to your doctor.

2: take the time you need to grieve. Experiencing a loss of traumatic. It may not hit you right away (emotionally) but that doesn't mean it won't. Rushing into TTC won't make the pain go away any faster if you aren't really ready.

3: try not to set deadlines for when you will have a baby. Nothing is guaranteed and setting a deadline most likely will only cause you pain and disappointment.

Again, I'm very sorry for your loss.

KadzoKimbia

Thank you.
I was just curious about other people's experiences that's what the online communities are all about after all, getting to know others through shared experiences. I know that everyone experiences things differently, I am not seeking medical advice.

As for grieving everyone does grieve differently and for me personally, I am done. This opinion is not shared by everyone and I respect that but I do not believe I was carrying a baby as it was not viable, I miscarried an embryo.

Since my due date was in December that's why I said I was hoping for my 4rd to be a December baby.
Thanks again for your support!

oceanangel0502

I miscarried at 6 weeks on Easter Sunday. Two weeks after my levels were back to zero and ultrasound looked good and doctor gave us the go ahead to try again, my first period is coming to an end today and we will start trying on this cycle.
Good luck to you!

MissVowles

KadzoKimbia said:

Thank you.
I was just curious about other people's experiences that's what the online communities are all about after all, getting to know others through shared experiences. I know that everyone experiences things differently, I am not seeking medical advice.

As for grieving everyone does grieve differently and for me personally, I am done. This opinion is not shared by everyone and I respect that but I do not believe I was carrying a baby as it was not viable, I miscarried an embryo.

Since my due date was in December that's why I said I was hoping for my 4rd to be a December baby.
Thanks again for your support!

I was due in December as well I started miscarrying on Monday of last week and I was very upset at first until my doctor explained to me what kind of miscarriage I had (blighted ovum) and I'm in the exact same boat as you. I'm relieved at my body's natural selection to know something was wrong with the cells and to give me the chance to have a healthy baby. I'm very ready to start trying again. My body physically though is not. Hcg levels haven't come completely down yet, I plan on trying the first time I ovulate though. I believe it's called a rainbow baby when you conceive before getting a period or the month after a loss.

Is your body physically done "misscarrying"? Are your hcg levels down completely?

linnea625

I'm pretty sure OP is not asking when it is medically safe to start trying again. She is taking a poll so to speak of how long others chose to wait (for emotional reasons, not medical ones).

As for me, my hcg levels are not back to 0 yet (medically induced mc on April 15). We'll be trying again after I get my first period back. (Doctor's recommendation)

I get that you are viewing this in a strictly rational way, that you lost an embryo, etc. Maybe since this is your second loss, you've figured out how to protect yourself by not seeing this as a baby or fetus since medically speaking it was not yet. Everyone copes differently, and that is fine. I also get that you weren't putting anyone down for grieving differently. But I think you may have touched a nerve for others who experienced early losses and do view their embryos as babies.

This is a generally supportive community, but understandably emotions are all over the place.

Good luck in making your decision of when to try again.

KadzoKimbia

@MissVowles I just started to miscarry on Sunday. But my hcg was already down to 53 yesterday. I get another test in a week to make sure the numbers are still dropping etc.

@linnea625 I am sorry if I have offended anyone, that was definitely not my intention. I was being defensive for sure. I felt tigerfish overstepped giving advice when none was asked for and felt she was being condescending in her post. I really do apologize and honestly want to support others in their losses and recoveries however THEY view them. I am not here to judge and would like to also not feel judged just because I have viewed my loss in a different way.

bntfroggie

MissVowles said:

KadzoKimbia said:

Thank you.
I was just curious about other people's experiences that's what the online communities are all about after all, getting to know others through shared experiences. I know that everyone experiences things differently, I am not seeking medical advice.

As for grieving everyone does grieve differently and for me personally, I am done. This opinion is not shared by everyone and I respect that but I do not believe I was carrying a baby as it was not viable, I miscarried an embryo.

Since my due date was in December that's why I said I was hoping for my 4rd to be a December baby.
Thanks again for your support!

I was due in December as well I started miscarrying on Monday of last week and I was very upset at first until my doctor explained to me what kind of miscarriage I had (blighted ovum) and I'm in the exact same boat as you. I'm relieved at my body's natural selection to know something was wrong with the cells and to give me the chance to have a healthy baby. I'm very ready to start trying again. My body physically though is not. Hcg levels haven't come completely down yet, I plan on trying the first time I ovulate though. I believe it's called a rainbow baby when you conceive before getting a period or the month after a loss.

Is your body physically done "misscarrying"? Are your hcg levels down completely?

A rainbow baby is any baby born after a miscarriage no matter how long it takes. I believe it is a rainbow because it is something beautiful after the storm of miscarriage.

MayBeSomeDay16

Sorry for your loss, i have the same point of view as you. I MC on 4/6 at 7w. That day my HCG was at 43 and they didn't even have me go back for any further blood work as it was so low and everything had passed very quickly. There was no recommendation on any wait time as it was a natural mc. We hooped on the band wagon asap. I have not started temping yet, just checking cm for the time being and having fun trying. I'm impatiently awaiting AF!

Good luck to you!

MissVowles

bntfroggie said:

MissVowles said:

KadzoKimbia said:

Thank you.
I was just curious about other people's experiences that's what the online communities are all about after all, getting to know others through shared experiences. I know that everyone experiences things differently, I am not seeking medical advice.

As for grieving everyone does grieve differently and for me personally, I am done. This opinion is not shared by everyone and I respect that but I do not believe I was carrying a baby as it was not viable, I miscarried an embryo.

Since my due date was in December that's why I said I was hoping for my 4rd to be a December baby.
Thanks again for your support!

I was due in December as well I started miscarrying on Monday of last week and I was very upset at first until my doctor explained to me what kind of miscarriage I had (blighted ovum) and I'm in the exact same boat as you. I'm relieved at my body's natural selection to know something was wrong with the cells and to give me the chance to have a healthy baby. I'm very ready to start trying again. My body physically though is not. Hcg levels haven't come completely down yet, I plan on trying the first time I ovulate though. I believe it's called a rainbow baby when you conceive before getting a period or the month after a loss.

Is your body physically done "misscarrying"? Are your hcg levels down completely?

A rainbow baby is any baby born after a miscarriage no matter how long it takes. I believe it is a rainbow because it is something beautiful after the storm of miscarriage.

Thanks for that clear up.

tigerfish227

KadzoKimbia said:

@MissVowles I just started to miscarry on Sunday. But my hcg was already down to 53 yesterday. I get another test in a week to make sure the numbers are still dropping etc.

@linnea625 I am sorry if I have offended anyone, that was definitely not my intention. I was being defensive for sure. I felt tigerfish overstepped giving advice when none was asked for and felt she was being condescending in her post. I really do apologize and honestly want to support others in their losses and recoveries however THEY view them. I am not here to judge and would like to also not feel judged just because I have viewed my loss in a different way.

I certainly was not intending to be condescending so I'm sorry you felt that way. I went thru a missed miscarriage 2 months ago and I do know how you are feeling about trying to rationalize and move on because I felt that way too. There have been a lot of posts lately about the subject of when to start back up and I was truly trying to be helpful because it can be dangerous to you if you start too soon. Just because someone else did doesn't mean everyone should. I hope that you can see that I wasn't trying to put you down or make you feel bad.

bbrianax

Almost three years, for personal and emotional reasons, but I agree with what others have said. Give yourself time to grieve and when you feel ready, you can try again.

lamarbreanna

I am currently miscarrying a blighted ovum, but in Janurary my husband and I lost our 1 yr daughter due to SIDS. I can agree with you at being ready to try again so soon, my dr and I have discussed waiting one cycle to begin TTC. She thinks that's plenty of time between pregnancies bc this is my first miscarriage and I chose to not intervene with my body miscarrying. So that is more than likely what we will do. As we so want to have another baby ASAP. I'm so sorry for your loss and best wishes on TTC soon!

KadzoKimbia

I am so sorry for your loss! I can't imagine the loss of a child you have grown to know and love.my thoughts are with you; I hope you get your rainbow baby soon!