TTC but DH has no drive

swtqtd

Hi all. I'm new here so be gentle! :-)
My DH & I have been TTC for 5-6 months. We are in our mid 30's. Recently he said that he doesn't have a sex drive & blames it on his past use of paraphernalia of sorts. I know he's not cheating, but it still makes me self conscious.
He knows that I would like to have a family & he wants that as well.
It's been at least 3 years since he has done the extracurricular
activities, so I'm not sure that this would still have an effect on him
now.
Have you ever heard of decreased sex drive due to use of drugs?
Any advice?

kmcc14

I'm not sure about the long-term effects of recreational drug use on fertility, but if you're 35 and have been trying for 6 months, it's time to see a reproductive endocrinologist.  They'll be able to do a full work up on you and your husband to let you know if there are any issues.  I'd also recommend temping to confirm when you are ovulating so that you will know if your intercourse was timed well.

Mysterious_wife

Could it be the pressures of TTC?just go with the flow and don't mention ovulation and trying.

swtqtd

Thanks ladies. We are not feeling pressured at all, I think we just hoped that it would just happen & now that it hasn't, he's starting to worry that it is him. I'll be looking into a specialist shortly,

I think I will start tempting as well.

kmcc14

swtqtd said:

Thanks ladies. We are not feeling pressured at all, I think we just hoped that it would just happen & now that it hasn't, he's starting to worry that it is him. I'll be looking into a specialist shortly,

I think I will start tempting as well.

Fertility Friend is a great app for temping.  Just make sure you get a basal body temperature thermometer that measures to the hundredth degree.  You might also consider picking up the book Taking Charge of Your Fertility by Toni Weschler.  It could be that everything is fine and you are just missing your fertile window.  Good luck!

swtqtd

Thanks! I just ordered the book!
I do have the basal thermometer, we shall try that next month.

FiancB

I'm not aware of any drugs having a long term effect on drive, but could be wrong. Plus, everyone's different.

It probably wouldn't hurt to have his testosterone levels checked. It sounds more plausible that that could be dipping than recreational drugs suddenly having adverse effects three years later. 

swtqtd

He had that checked & we give him shots weekly. That is enjoyable! I always love it when he annoys me right before he gets it... makes it so much fun for me to see him 'cry'
lol