FFFQ-Flame Free Friday Questions 3/20

MrsWiggleWaggle

im starting this for selfish reasons since I'm FTM fretting about something. so if any other moms have kind of silly/newbie questions feel free to join.

If I'm breastfeeding my kid is it realistic for me to pump so that my DH can participate too? Can I reasonably expect to be able to pump enough to stash...or is that like taking a feeding away from the baby? He really wants to participate in all aspects of caring for our child. I'm a bit confused about boob juice logistics.

starrysmile18

I was hoping to be able to stash some with DS #1. My body unfortunately did not produce much, and I even had to supplement each BF session with 3 oz of formula. I pumped after feedings, but only got another ounce or so.

Don't be afraid to plan, but also, make sure you have a back up plan, because your body may not produce as much as you hope.

Mommaswizz

I'm a FTM so i could be way off here but i think if you feed the baby from one boob and pump the other, you should be able to feed and stash without taking anything away from the baby.

I'm going to give Bfing my best effort but i'm not gonna stress if it doesn't work. However, if it does work for me I'm curious just how much i can be able to store. I'm going away for 2.5 days in September without my husband and I'm not sure if i'll have made enough milk for my husband to feed the baby solely breast milk. It seems like I'd have to have a lot of milk. I think that's my biggest BFing worry right now.

laurendutch

I started to breastfeed twins and in order for me to get my supply up, I would breastfeed and then pump for another 20 minutes on each breast. But I honestly, don't know how that works. I'm curious too!

KaLikeAWind

That's a great question @MrsWiggleWaggle - I have been hoping to do the same so that the hubster can have that time with Ewok, too. Not to mention take over a few of those feedings so that I can have some time off

ksimo6

starrysmile18 said:

I was hoping to be able to stash some with DS #1. My body unfortunately did not produce much, and I even had to supplement each BF session with 3 oz of formula. I pumped after feedings, but only got another ounce or so.

Don't be afraid to plan, but also, make sure you have a back up plan, because your body may not produce as much as you hope.

This.  I nursed exclusively for 2 weeks and then switched to the pump.  I was underproducing so we had to supplement with formula as well.  Just kow that your plans will likley have to change.  I had PLANNED to pump for at least 6 months.  I weaned off the pump at 10 weeks.  The time I was putting into pumping was not worth the 6 ounces I was getting in a day.... 

mccall35

With DS My doc recommended to exclusively BF for 6 weeks to establish a good milk supply. Then feed one side, pump the other (unless baby was hungry and wanted to nurse both sides) and introduce the DH and the bottle at the 6 week mark. It worked great for us. I produced like a mad man and DH got to do a couple feelings a day.

ElRuby

My lactation consultant was like "pump pump pump"... It was exhausting trying to nurse and pump consistently! Sometimes I HAD to pump if DS was not hungry because I felt like I would explode so for that it was well worth it!

megtyrrell

I don't have anything to add to the breastfeeding conversation since I'm a FTM and really only know what I've read or been told... But I have a question.

I've been wondering if it would be really awful to have my mom in the delivery room with my fiancé and me, but not my fiancé's mom? I really only wanted to have my fiancé in there but I think I'll want my mom there to comfort me. What are some ladies' thoughts on this?

ElRuby

I had my husband, my mom, and my sister.... I wouldn't in a million years have had his mother or his sister there and he 100% respected my decision (probably knew better than to even ask

KaLikeAWind

I wouldn't have DH's mom in there either.

katyertl

I'm not having any of our parents or any other relatives. It's our baby and if I need comforting I want my husband to feel like he's involved and needed by me. But everyone's different! I just want it to be between my husband and I. I mean that's who was there when the order was placed so...lol

karaelaine1991

megtyrrell said:

I don't have anything to add to the breastfeeding conversation since I'm a FTM and really only know what I've read or been told... But I have a question.

I've been wondering if it would be really awful to have my mom in the delivery room with my fiancé and me, but not my fiancé's mom? I really only wanted to have my fiancé in there but I think I'll want my mom there to comfort me. What are some ladies' thoughts on this?

My MIL made a comment over a year ago (so WAY before baby or wedding) about how she couldn't wait to be in the delivery room when her grandchildren arrive. Um, no. Not happening. I didn't really respond at the time since it wasn't an issue and it hasn't come up since, but nope - it's a medical procedure, not a show. She'll have plenty of time to see baby later, she doesn't need to be there for the actual delivery.

megtyrrell

Thanks for the replies!

ladun6

My DS#1 was in the NICU for a week and I was unable to start breastfeeding him right away so I had to pump.  I know a lot of people tell you not to pump for a while and get your supply "established" first.  I pumped immediately and had such an oversupply it was great I thought.  I literally filled my small chest freezer after a while from pumping and storing so much.  When my son came home I was very fortunate that he would nurse and take the bottle so I would alternate at will and DH could help.  The stash helped so much as when I went back to work and was pumping at work all day my supply slowly (over months) went down.  So when I wasn't producing at work what he was drinking while I was gone I was able to start using a lot from my stash.  I made it to 7 months before having to supplement a little with formula because my supply had gone down.  Fingers crossed my new little one has no stay in the NICU but I plan on doing the same thing this time, pumping right away and switching back and forth from bottle to breast.  Having the flexibility and the stash made my life a lot easier!  

virginiaunicorn11

Question (that probably sounds really dumb): is there any way to tell what kind of movements you're feeling?

I know the baby's head is down, but now that s/he's getting bigger, I'm feeling all kinds of different things. Kicks and punches are obvious, but there are protrusions and rolls and weird bubbles and who knows what else. Many weeks ago, the hiccups were so rhythmic they were obvious, but not so much any more... though sometimes it does feel like my whole belly jerks. Wish I had a spy cam!

HoosOnFirst

amark11 said:

Question (that probably sounds really dumb): is there any way to tell what kind of movements you're feeling?

I know the baby's head is down, but now that s/he's getting bigger, I'm feeling all kinds of different things. Kicks and punches are obvious, but there are protrusions and rolls and weird bubbles and who knows what else. Many weeks ago, the hiccups were so rhythmic they were obvious, but not so much any more... though sometimes it does feel like my whole belly jerks. Wish I had a spy cam!

Heh I was thinking this last night! The movements I get now are very different than they were. I described it as a "wave across my stomach" - like the entire baby is moving from one end to another.

KonaCoffeeBean

megtyrrell said:

I don't have anything to add to the breastfeeding conversation since I'm a FTM and really only know what I've read or been told... But I have a question.

I've been wondering if it would be really awful to have my mom in the delivery room with my fiancé and me, but not my fiancé's mom? I really only wanted to have my fiancé in there but I think I'll want my mom there to comfort me. What are some ladies' thoughts on this?

I think there's a special circle in hell for people who question or intrude on a mother's decision about who to have in the delivery room with her.

ngaines27

megtyrrell said:

I don't have anything to add to the breastfeeding conversation since I'm a FTM and really only know what I've read or been told... But I have a question.

I've been wondering if it would be really awful to have my mom in the delivery room with my fiancé and me, but not my fiancé's mom? I really only wanted to have my fiancé in there but I think I'll want my mom there to comfort me. What are some ladies' thoughts on this?

I've had my mom and husband in the delivery room with both of my deliveries and plan to do the same with this one. I have not ever even considered inviting my MIL in the delivery room to see my lady bits out in the open like that and I have zero regrets about that.

MrsWiggleWaggle

megtyrrell said:

I don't have anything to add to the breastfeeding conversation since I'm a FTM and really only know what I've read or been told... But I have a question.

I've been wondering if it would be really awful to have my mom in the delivery room with my fiancé and me, but not my fiancé's mom? I really only wanted to have my fiancé in there but I think I'll want my mom there to comfort me. What are some ladies' thoughts on this?

My two cents is for sure this is ok. it might hurt MIL feelings a little and thats ok. your MIL is not your mom, thats just the way it is. different relationship. IT would help to explain that you want your mom there for you, and you are not trying to snub MIL.

And thank you for all the responses about breastfeeding! it makes me feel much more confident!