Pregnant after 35

Birth Story

NeonNoonNeonNoon member
edited April 2015 in Pregnant after 35

Short version:

I was in labor for 40 hrs including early labor but not including prodromal labor, 22 of which were at the hospital.  I managed to do it without medicinal pain management, largely thanks to DH since I had given up many times over.  He surprised me as to how good a coach he was.  DS is generally OK, but developed jaundice and we are ABO incompatible.  He was borderline, so didn't need phototherapy but had to be monitored.  His numbers are finally dropping to a lower risk category and I can breathe a sigh of relief and transition to motherhood.

Long version:

I'd been having prodromal labor for a few weeks and had experienced other pre-labor signs of lightening, and show.  I had prodromal labor the day before the real thing, but it stalled as it had done many times before.  I have a strange relationship with pain - I don't always feel it.  So, I wasn't sure if I would feel real labor pain but I did.

Contractions started around 6.30 am Monday last week, but they weren't regular, and while they were painful, I could handle it.  By 3.30 am on Tuesday, they seemed more regular with periods of about 2-3 mins and lasted at least an hour.  So, we headed to the hospital.  I was 3 cm dilated (I had thought I was further along), 80% effaced.  My contractions had slowed down though, due to stage-fright, I think.  They also became irregular again and stayed that way for most of the rest.

By 10.00 am, I was antsy again.  A cervix check showed that, again, I hadn't made as much progress as I thought.  I was only at 5 cm.  I was GBS positive, so I had to get IV antibiotics every 4 hours.  I asked them to turn off the IV between doses.  I also asked for intermittent monitoring (20 mins on, 40 mins off).  So, I was able to get on my feet now and then.  As time wore on, though, my legs got weaker, and I needed to hold on to something to stay up.  The relaxation techniques I had learned during birth classes also went out the window; they weren't working.

At several points during the day, my morale hit rock bottom.  I didn't believe I could go on unassisted. DH was a star and kept me going.  I catnapped when I could, which wasn't often or for long enough.  For some reason, the nurses seemed impressed by my 'calmness'.  If only they knew how I really felt.

At 7 pm, my OB called to check my progress.  She was headed home and I was only 6 cm or 7.  ( BS from my birth class: "the pain peaks at 7 cm," no it doesn't!).  My water broke at 10 pm.  And for whatever reason (possibly to slow down contractions until the on-call doctor arrived) the labor nurse put me on my side, horizontally.  This was the most awful pain I had ever experienced.  I could no longer suffer in silence.  I loudly moaned through the contractions until the doctor arrived.  The moron doctor thought it was appropriate to tell me that I should've done an epidural, you know, after 10s of hours of labor and with the end in sight.  If I were being filmed for reality TV, I would pause the pushing and stare at the camera with a blank face.  Then, I was allowed to sit up and the pain was manageable again.  

But I was completely spent.  Coached pushing commenced and I kept being told I was almost there.  But I couldn't seem to cross the finish line.  I begged for vacuum assistance - anything to get the baby out.  DH and the doctor thought I should keep pushing.  I just let my body do its thing at this point since I had nothing more to give.  I also agreed to an episiotomy and DS was born just after 1 am on Wednesday at 7 lb 2 oz.

A little bit about DS:

He has his dukes up a lot, ready to strike in protest in a moment's notice.  He's very vocal, which is good because I am clueless.  He seems to be an alternative rock fan.  His worst enemy is cold surfaces.  (Pic attached - he's still quite jaundiced in it, may delete in time.)

I'm still adjusting to the amount of work a newborn takes.  I must say my standard of 'clean enough' has taken a new meaning with everything covered in milk and urine.

Thank you all for your support and companionship.  I can't believe how quickly it all went.  Hope you all have smooth pregnancies and I look forward to seeing you in Parenting>35.


Re: Birth Story

  • Wow. That's a long time and lot of work to go with no drugs. You're one tough ass lady, @NeonNoon. Your little guy is handsome! Congratulations and here's to you guys! <:-P
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  • @NeonNoon‌ you are my new hero. I am so proud you did it all with out meds. Unbelievably proud. Me being the weenie I am needed them. So yeah you are a rock star. And he is absolutely precious.
    Hopefully will see you in the other groups. Congrats!
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    Proud Mom to Kaleigh (14yr) Emma (12yr) and Hanna (7yr)

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  • Congratulations!! He's adorable. I am super impresssed with your unmedicated labor. I am not that strong. lol  I am a suffer in silence kind of person so I don't make a lot of noise and I'm not very vocal when I'm actually in pain.  I just want everyone to stop touching me and I just breathe. I remember the nurses asking me over and over with my son in 2008.. are you sure you want the epidural.. you're doing such a great job..  I'm like yeah that's wonderful but yes I want the epidural. lol  i didn't feel my initial contractions with DD either. 

    Congrats again! Good job! 
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  • Awesome! He's adorable! And great job, mama.

    **siggy warning**

    Current Age 35, DH 33

    Married 9/2011

    BFP 8/2012, Miscarried 9/2012

    BFP 9/2012, DS 6/2013

    BFP 6/2014, Miscarried 7/2014

    BFP 7/2014, DD 4/2015

  • Congrats!!!  He is absolutely beautiful!!! 

    With my first I was in labor for 40 hrs.  I did 34hrs at home.  I was so exhausted by the time I was admitted I got the epidural.  You are amazing going unmedicated!! 
    ****Siggy Warning***
    ~Formerly ABabyMabe4us

    Me(35) Him(35) Untied for life 4/1/2015.
    TTC Our 1st since 8/2014
    MC @ 7 weeks 5/2014
    Me: DD#1 3/2000, DD#2 6/2001, DS 5/2003
    BFP: 2/19/2015 EDD: 11/1/2015 IT'S A BOY!!!!

  • Wow, @NeonNoon.  You are a rock star.  And your baby boy is adorable.  Congrats. :)
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  • Adorable! Congrats!

    nate and teddy        <img src= width="150px">

    Me 43 DH 48 Not actively ttc, surprise BFP on 1/6/11! 4/1/11 m/c our sunshine at 16wks after complications from CVS test.  *5th cycle after loss 12/6/11 BFP! Missed m/c at 9 weeks 1/21/12, trisomy 14. Two Chemical PG 3/12&7/12
    ** BFP 8/16/12 beta #1 148! beta#2 407 beta #3 4000 u/s 9.10 1 lovely hb 126, Baby Boy born 5/6/2013!

    TTC #2, bpf 1/15/15 Baby Girl due Oct 1! She's here, 9/26/2015! 

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  • Congrats!! 


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  • awwww...he is darling!  The jaundice doesn't really show through in the picture at all. 

    Most likely the reason they had you lay on your side was because your bp might have been climbing up and this often helps lower it.  Or another reason could be the baby's heart rate changed.  Sometimes when they break your water the cord can become a bit compressed or smushed up somewhere and sometimes a change in your position will change baby's position and get the heart rate to adjust too. 

    Isn't it funny how once its all over labor sort of feels like this cloudy dream?  But did you feel super afterwards?  I always did....even if in pain and tired I felt sort of like I was the only person who had ever given birth or something.  Hard to explain.  I guess its all the natural endorphines you get to deal with the pain when you don't take any meds!
  • Delete? What do you mean delete, he is gorgeous! What a great photo.

    I hope the reward for that gargantuan effort will be a very quick recovery for you.

    Thank you for taking the time to write the story - I really enjoyed reading it.  I bet you seemed totally composed on the outside (not that this matters one way or another). And I can't believe the doctor said you should have gotten the epidural. I think I would have snapped at him "Well, I didn't so how is that relevant now?" with perhaps a few choice epithets here and there, depending on exhaustion levels.

    Giant CONGRATULATIONS to you and a virtual welcome to the cutie.  
  • Wow! Congrats! Wishing you a speedy recovery
    Me-37, DH-38
    Married in 2006, TTC #1 since Jan 2012

    Baby Boy born June 1, 2015

    He settles her in her home as a happy mother of children, praise the Lord! (Psalms 113:9)
    And the peace of God, which surpasses all understand, will guard your heart and mind in Jesus Christ (Philippians 4:7)

  • Congrats!! He is beautiful!!
    Lilypie Pregnancy tickers
  • Congratulations!  Thank you for sharing your story.  I am also planning to go un-medicated, and I think everyone thinks I'm crazy and that there's no way I could do it.  Reading your story gives me inspiration that it is do-able, in spite of how difficult it is.  Thank you!
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  • Congrats @neonnoon!! He is beautiful!! With my first they gave me pitocin and made me lay on my side in bed. Ugh! I remember moaning and saying I could not do it to my husband. I think I might need that epidural! He just kept saying remember you did not want that. Lol! Being able to get up or a least sit makes a huge difference. Some how I made it with out it and you did too!! Way to go!! FYI my next 2 births were so much easier and drug free. Just in case your thinking about more babies already :) Hope you are both feeling good!! Take care!

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  • Congrats!  He is beautiful!
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  • ••••lurking from your old board•••••

    Oh he is so precious.
    I had two unmedicated births so I know what you went through. But mine were not as long as yours. I can only imagine the exhaustion. But you did it and that's awesome!!!!!
    I totally agree about the laying down. I labored sitting up mostly and it wasn't that bad.
    Your husband gets kudos. It's great to have that kind if support. You need that when your brain is fried from labor.
    I'm so happy for you.
    Congrats momma.

      Me:39, DH:40

    DD born 8/96, DS born 8/04


    NTNP since 2006, active trying 1/13

    Natural M/C 3/13 at 7 weeks

    CP 2/14

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    All welcome

  • Congratulations, dear! He is beautiful.


                 Visit The Nest!image Visit The Nest!

      "It is better to light a candle than curse the darkness." - Eleanor Roosevelt


  • Congratulations! He's lovely!!
    Elizabeth 5yrs old Jane 3yrs old

  • Congrats!!! He is precious!! Sorry for a rough labor but glad that YH was awesome!!

    ME:46 MH:44 DE IVF 2014
    Met with RE 4/11. 2 IUI's BFN. DE best option. Switched clinics to do "shared" program. Had to retake all tests and a mamm that put me behind and then on a DE waiting list for 12 months. Picked a donor!! (10/13/13) Got matched. Estimated transfer in December. After 2.5 years of patiently waiting I will finally cycle....can hardly believe it. DE cycle got cancelled. One of her tests came back positive.  Waiting for another donor. Donor picked!! (1/18/14)

    DE IVF #1 (4/26) BFN  DE FET #1 (6/4) BFP! Beta 1=339 Beta 2=852 Beta 3=9957 EDD 2/22/15!!



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