How does labor really feel?

Rikki_5

For all you who have had children before I’d like to know
what labor feels like if you can describe it!! 
I’m a FTM and freaking out about the labor part!

Mrs.Slick

We still have a long way to go. I'd not let yourself freak out about this yet if possible.

Carmofrap

It's such a hard thing to describe. It's painful but more specifically it is very very very intense. I had my son at home without pain interventions and It comes and goes in waves. They grow in intensity and then fade off and you get a break. At some point you'll feel like you can't do it anymore but you can and when you start feeling like that you're usually in transition and it's almost over. pushing was easy and painless for me. It's so hard to describe what a contraction feels like because I honest to god can't remember. I just remember they hurt. But it wasn't anything I wasn't able to handle.
You can try watching some birthing videos. there are a million on youtube. I watched a couple waterbirth videos before I went into labor with my son. They'll definitely help you with the freaking out part.

nsaid4u

I am pregnant with baby #4. Contractions feel like period cramps but 100x stronger, and when the baby is coming out...well....feels like a lot of pressure on your vagina, burning,tearing,riping....its easily the worst pain of your life but with the biggest reward..dont count on an epidural because not everyone qualifies for one..depends on how fast your labour goes, if u are in established labour,and so on..the pain is horrible but the second the baby is out you forget all about the pain. I have had 3 vaginal deliveries and after 2-3 days i was painless and feeling back to normal.

yoopermom824

I agree that contractions feel like period cramps (at least for me). I used to get HORRIBLE period cramps and I've even landed in the ER from the extreme pain and I definitely felt like they compared when I was in labor. 
I don't remember the pain too much anymore, though! I forgot ALL about it when my DD was placed on my chest (thank goodness)!

Rikki_5

So amazing to hear all your stories! I know it’s early just trying to prepare myself.  This is all new territory for me J

1stComesLove421

The best way I can describe it is- It feels like your rib cage is tightening and then releases. For some woman it's just like period cramps and for others it hurts. This all depends on the position of the baby, your pain tolerance, and how you choose to labor.

Walking helps, so do warm showers. I didn't have a birthing ball but I've heard those help. When you go through a contraction try and put your focus on your breathing. You have to learn to surrender your body. I started off the first few hours screaming in pain (my baby was postier position, so she was up against my spine), but then I learned to take deep breaths and put that energy towards something else.

Once in labor it will take awhile and you'll try many different things, but once you find something that works stick with it.

Don't let stories scare you, yours could be very different.

And most first time births don't go as planned. Mine didn't, so I always choose not to share it. I know what to expect with this next one and what it will take to achieve the birth I want. Now I can better prepare myself.

Take your time and make a birth plan. Not everything will go according to plan, but use it as a guideline.

Kayleeandryan

I started having contractions weeks early with my first. The exercise ball was so helpful!
I agree contractions are like period cramps times 100! Just feels like all of you abdominal muscle contracting and holding very tightly without your control. I remember it being painful but I could breath through it because I knew it was temporary. Once they gave me pitocin because I was not dialating it got a lot more intense. I was throwing up with just about every contraction.

AnnikaD20

It took me a while to even be sure I was in labor, cause the contractions were so mild at first. They felt a lot like the Braxton Hicks I'd been having for months, which are a non-painful tightening sensation where your bump gets rock hard for a few moments. Then they progressed to period cramps by the time I went to the hospital. They decided to break my water and then the contractions got a lot more intense to the point where I was crying and throwing up and decided I needed the drugs. And I took a nap. I had them turn off the epidural to push so I could feel what I was doing, but things were a lot easier at that point. Pushing hurt for sure (probably didn't help that my DS had a 95th percentile head size), but the moment he was out it was just relief and the pain instantly stopped.

Even though I think my labor was worse than a lot of women I've talked to, I'm actually a lot less scared the 2nd time. I know it's doable, I know that you get good breaks to relax between contractions, and I know that it ends. And hearing my baby's first cries... swoon.

Sweet Sadie Mae

Carmofrap said:

It's such a hard thing to describe. It's painful but more specifically it is very very very intense. I had my son at home without pain interventions and It comes and goes in waves. They grow in intensity and then fade off and you get a break. At some point you'll feel like you can't do it anymore but you can and when you start feeling like that you're usually in transition and it's almost over. pushing was easy and painless for me. It's so hard to describe what a contraction feels like because I honest to god can't remember. I just remember they hurt. But it wasn't anything I wasn't able to handle.
You can try watching some birthing videos. there are a million on youtube. I watched a couple waterbirth videos before I went into labor with my son. They'll definitely help you with the freaking out part.

This is what I remember. I just remember the contractions hurting. The pushing felt like relief to me. I had to be cut (I got novacaine shot so I didn't feel that) so when my daughter came it that didn't hurt at all for me. Also I was too far along to get the epidural so I was alnatural. I had kidney stones two years ago and it felt similar. Just remember. .. most of us don't remember the pain because after its all over it didn't matter and yoy get to cuddle your baby and eat!

vamomtobe

The actual way it feels, there's no way to prepare for it!  And it's different for each of us, and I hear from moms of 2+, different even with each delivery!  I got through mine by reminding myself that it HAD to end in the relatively near-term, and the joy of having your baby in your arms is worth whatever it takes to get there.  

There are a lot of books out there that go into some detail about the process, particularly about what happens during each stage of labor and what the nurses/doctors will want to do in certain cases.  But since you like to be prepared, definitely read up on the delivery process so you can be informed in case you need to make decisions during delivery.  It can be stressful, and the whole being-in-labor thing can make it difficult to think clearly (imagine that!).  So I found it helpful to study up a bit ahead of time, and even tried to make DH learn a thing or two in case I was totally out of my mind.  

deanna1313

I guess cramps is the best thing to compare them to, but it is definitely different at the same time. It's hard to compare the experience to anything at all. I had an epidural and once I got it I felt great. Relieved to not feel the contraction pain anymore. I pushed for over two hours, but for me it wasn't too bad. They used forceps and that was a little stressful, but not bad. Honestly, it's not horrible.
Stop thinking about it. I tried not to freak out about and out it out if my kind until the end if my pregnancy.

Rikki_5

thanks ladies! each of your stories are all so inspiring!

Baby&Ash

A lot of people I've asked have said it burns a lot when the head comes out :-S

eaglet88

How does the exercise ball help?

AnnikaD20

eaglet88 said:

How does the exercise ball help?

You can bounce/sway on it during contractions, it leaves your back exposed for your helpers to put counter-pressure on your lower back, and a lot of women find it to be a less unpleasant way to labor compared to some of the other options.

A lot of women like laboring in a warm tub, but I tried that for 2 contractions and noped on out of there. It almost seemed to make it worse for me. So everyone is different, and it's good to try a couple options.

babymazzei

I'm a FTM and it took me a couple of attempts to click on this discussion because I didn't want to freak myself out. But I am SO glad I did! All of you women just made me so much more relaxed about it! I'm still terrified no doubt, but this definitely helped. My biggest concern is that I'll faint. Its beyond embarrassing how weak my stomach is but I need to find a way to get over my phobia before this lil peanut comes along! 

Thanks ladies! Your stories helped more than you know.

debbiefellowescarter

I had to be induced with my son (we were 12 days over due) I didnt realise ai was in having contractions until I was 6 cms dilated . Up until this point I just thought I had back pain (this was because my baby was back to back). Labour itself was not scary just go with it..... its really surprising how your body just takes over for you.

ladylbb

My contractions felt like I had to poo, lol. I literally went to the toilet a couple times before I realized they were contractions. It wasn't painful, at first, just uncomfortable. But, every women is different and it just depends on how your body responds to the pain.

smlowe9311

Honest to goodness from the time she was born (11:49 am) to the time we were moved to our recovery room (around 5 or 6 that night) I had forgotten about how painful it was. Like I knew in my head that it had hurt but I couldn't remember what it felt like anymore. I remember talking to the nurse who was wheeling me to the new room about that exact thing. It's truly amazing to me because I don't have a very high pain tolerance but labored and delivered without an epidural.

jenn2132

Contractions feel like a tightening that starts in your back and moves all the way across your belly. It lasts a few seconds then releases. Initially the pain is mild but eventually they start getting stronger and more painful and the closer they get together the harder it can be to tolerate the pain because there is little time to rest before the onset of the next one. I had my epidural at 5cm and if my contractions weren't a minute apart I could have tolerated the pain longer but being so close together it was hard to even catch my breath before the next one started. After my epidural I was feeling absolutely no pain until it was time to push then I was feeling it bad! Some people are so numb from the epidural they don't feel the baby coming out but I did and it hurt! Granted my child had a big head and weighed 9+ pounds but it hurt enough to bring tears for all 40 minutes of pushing. But I definitely agree you forget about the pain soon after and your baby's sweet face makes u crazy enough to do it again and again! You'll so great, try not to stress and trust your body.

ChristyD6

Labor and delivery is crazy! Lol and yes everyone is different. I handled contractions very well at first. They were like strong period cramps, really intense and tight. The gradually built up, held, and then tapered off. My contractions were 2min long and 4min apart at the end, which is really far apart! I almost fell asleep between each contraction even without any pain meds or an epi. THEN they got worse! Like multiplied by 10. I begged for all the drugs but it was too late, aka transition. Pushing was hard for me but not painful compared to not pushing.

Afterwards it was a high. I immediately wanted to do it again. I got mad at birthing classes when the nurse compared labor to a marathon bc my marathon took under 5hrs and most ftm labor for 10-12hrs but afterwards I totally got the comparison. It's hard but an amazing accomplishment and I can't wait to do it again!!!

Nellennium

I had back labour, the midwives said they'd never seen someone's back muscles tense the way mine did. I won't tell you anymore about that except I won't do it again!

If baby is not in the right position (he was trying to come out forehead first so the back of his head was grinding against my spine and I never dilated fully) I'll be having a c-section

I was planning a water birth! So, you know, things don't always pan out the way you plan or feel the way you imagined (I was expecting really bad period pain which I get normally anyway).

CocoR04

@Nellennium I also had back labor!

The tightening across the belly stuff never happened to me. My labor was in my back and came 1.5 minutes apart for 10 hours before I got an epi. I also had an irritable uterus, so that was the reason for little rest in between contractions.

Once I got the epi, I would describe my birth experience as the opposite of my labor: the most beautiful, pain free, intimate, and calm experiences of my life. It was wonderful.

lofin

I would agree with the period cramp thing for contractions. They get tougher as you get more into labor. The actually birthing part is hard to describe too but I guess like a burning maybe? As the baby is coming out.

It def doesn't tickle! the thing to remember is that it ends with such a gift. I try to be open minded in my birth plan and to stay calm during labor. Music helped me along with my husband counting it down so I knew when the contraction is over. You'll do great!

MamaOwl15

Thanks for sharing your stories. I have never been in labor since my son was delivered by c-section at 36w 5d, but I'm strongly considering trying for a VBAC; I'm just terrified of labor pains, especially when baby comes out!

tuinstrab

I personally thought contractions were more of a tightening similar to a Charlie horse but on your stomach. I felt my contractions higher up on my stomach than down where period cramps are. Pushing for me didn't hurt. I do remember a point where it felt really weird and I had to be told to stop resisting it lol. Yep it all hurts but you can do it!!

cantsitwithus

It sucks. I don't even know to describe it. The important thing to remember is that labor is a finite thing. Nobody is in labor forever. It will end eventually and you will get to hold your baby.

sweet+cheeks

I think the most reassuring thing for me is that I didn't have to "do" anything. I mean there are techniques and positions that can help labor but you don't have to make labor happen. Your body knows what to do and completely takes over. It's primal and beautiful and empowering. I would encourage you to learn about the stages and mechanics of labor so you can better understand what is happening. Just be aware that I haven't found a single woman who has had the same experience. We took all the classes and thought we'd know what to expect but DH didn't belive me when I told him I was in labor because I didn't follow the progression outlined in the class. I hope has learned to take my word for it this time!

numbr2

Labor hurts contractions hurt pushing. Gives relief to the pain once you can.. My epidural wore of or didn't work so I felt it full blast. The minute that baby is in your arms you forget the whole last 20 hours of your life or however long it takes. I never wanted to believe anyone who told me that but it's true or none of us would ever do it more than one time. Literally 3 minutes before my dd was born I grabbed my husbands shirt and screamed IM NEVER DOING THIS AGAIN. 2 minutes later she was born and they put her on my chest and I looked at her and said " you are definitely going to need a little brother or sister " no lie. Now 16 months later we are pregnant with twins

TheMrs1009

For me, the hardest part of labor weren't the contractions. Yes, they were the most painful and longest set of cramps I'd ever had. But the worst for me was the vomiting *with* the contractions. The worst contractions caused me to vomit intensely and during my "rest" periods, I was preparing to throw up. It was worse with my first than with my second but I had it with both babies.

I got an epidural with my second and had contractions through the application of that too (and vomiting). That was fun.

But as everyone said, it's all worth it. In fact, I can't even really recall what the pain felt like -- just my thoughts of and reactions to it.

satori15

I found the classes really helpful. I will admit it was pretty painful until they gave me the epidural- then I felt NOTHING. I was fully dilated and ready to push and had no idea!

Dreamingmommy4

It's not really something you can describe, there isn't really anything to compare it to, you just have to experience it. It is painful, not like the pain of being injured, but it doesn't necessaily have to hurt. That probably doesn't make sense but I'm not sure how else to explain it. Honestly my contractions really weren't bad, they were strong and intense but were manageable. I really think it helps knowing that with every contraction you are one step closer to meeting your baby and that there is an end to the whole process, it makes it all worth it. I have some pretty intense pelvic pressure because of how my DD was turned, it made for really intense and uncomfortable active labor and I eventually wound up with an epi even though I had wanted to go unmedicated. She was born 3 hours after getting the epi, I really just needed to relax, once that happened, it all moved pretty quick. I had a 21 hour labor from start to finish and I always say, if I had to repeat every moment of it the exact same every time I had a child I would. Just be sure to educate yourself about it. Knowing what was happening to my body and understanding the different things really helped me to be in the right mindset to deal with the pain, when I had trouble with it was when I got tired and broke my focus. Don't be afraid of it, and don't worry about it. You will have a beautiful little baby in your arms at the end that will make anything you had to go through worth it.

Dreamingmommy4

Baby&Ash said:

A lot of people I've asked have said it burns a lot when the head comes out :-S

It does but you kind of don't care because at that point you are just like "freaking get this baby out of me!" And that part of pushing is so short, it burns for a few seconds as the baby's head crowns then all of a sudden they say to push hard and the rest of the baby slides out and they put them on your chest and you don't care anymore. I had a 9lbs 3oz baby and I am only 5'5". I only had two stitches because I tore a little. It was weird because it didn't really hurt, like injury pain, it just felt like my vag was on fire (thus why they call it the ring of fire) and I yelled a little, but then she was out and I was holding my little girl and it didn't really hurt anymore. I hope this helps!

edehe2389

You also can feel contractions in your butt, when they say push like you pooping they mean it, that's the gayest way to get baby out. You technically give birth twice, after baby you have to birth the placenta, it's weird looking. Since this is your first you'll probably need stitches, these hurt as well and there is a water bottle you'll use to aim at them while you pee after labor. These are things I wish I were told before and weren't so good luck and don't worry. The pain doesn't even matter the second that baby is placed on your chest.

jessica973

Feels like period cramps but times a 1000. I didn't have lain medicine until a hour before I had my baby. They had me on this stuff and kept putting more and more to make my contractions come faster. It was very painful. My baby kept going up instead of down. But after the baby is out you will feel sooo much better.

hprangnell

Mine was like cramps in my back pulling away from cramps in my abdomen... it was really weird. And it hurt, but it was bearable. The best part? Getting to the stage you feel the urge to push, where you get to do something with the pain. Then afterwards, I had a shot where I tore a bit and I said, "Ouch! That hurt!" and they were looking at me like I was nuts because I had just pushed a baby out and was complaining about a needle prick!

But really, ladies, our bodies were meant for this. And if for whatever reason it isn't working/hurts too much/whatever, the nurses and doctors are ready to help you and the baby get through it. You do what you need to do to have a healthy mom and baby, because the labor is just the beginning of a whole new life. So don't stress too much about the labor- you're going to be fine whatever option you choose- and be excited that at the end of the pain... there is a baby!!

Lexie Marie

With my first I got the epi at 5 cm (water had already broke) and the contractions were starting to get to the "no talking/just hold the bed" stage. They had the epi turned up all the way so come time to push and I couldn't feel a lick. I attempted to push and push or what I thought was pushing for 4 hours and my son started to go in distress, with my consent they used the forceps and ten minutes he was born. (9lbs 14.3 oz for my little petite self). I was fine until the epi wore off and I was extremely swollen from having birth such a big child for my size and also from the tear from the epistomy. The recovery of that was hell. I remember the recovery phase being much harder on me than labor itself. 

With my second... I used a midwife over a doctor (best decision EVER) and the labor was 180 degrees different. I got the epi at 7 cm and rotated laying on sides so her head would come down as far as we could so it would be less pushing on my end. They turned the epi down some and it made me able to feel the urge to push so I was working with my body not against it.  5-10 minutes of pushing and she was born! Recovery was nothing and I was up walking shortly after. 

I had a lot of anxiety about labor with my first, but some how you just do it... and then you look back and think holy shit I really do have super powers. I was "nervous" with my second but not scared. You realize that the pain is only temporary and the emotional change you undergo when they slip that baby into your arms for the first time, is like NOTHING else in this world. 

sarahmschwab

I have been blessed with really short labors. They do hurt, but I like what others have said ... you know there's an end to the pain and you know there will be rests in between. I loved laboring sitting up and I would just try to find a zone. .. I made poor hubby go sit in the chair because he was distracting me by trying to help. I've given birth naturally all three times and the pushing ends up being the best part ... feels so good after contractions.

Another thing that helped was reading up on what you're body is doing during labor. Somehow knowing what is going on makes the pain more bearable ... you know it's doing something instead of just being this thing that's happening to you.

You'll do great! Billions of women have traveled this road before you!