Doesn't AF feel like a slap in the face?

adrimolina

I had a MC back in October and it has been harder than I could've ever imagined. My Dr. said to wait 3 months and we just started trying again and I just got AF and every time it comes it feels like a slap in the face! A constant reminder of what I lost... I can't imagine how I am going to feel when 6-16-15 (EDD) comes along..so many questions. Full of sadness today. I will try again this month and see what happens. I have been wanting a baby for so long and I am nervous because I am not getting any younger, will be 37 this year and DH is 40.

Anyone else feel the same way?

MIssSally25

I'm sorry for your loss. I lost my baby January 5th, and I still haven't gotten my AF. I'm not looking forward to it though.  Are you temping and charting? I don't have any experience with it personally, but I know it has helped a lot of ladies. Good luck! 

[Deleted User]

First, I'm sorry for you loss, I truly am. There is no community here to help you anymore.... if you are interested in a place that will provide a real sense of community and support look around and find the link to "the dark side".

There are some women here (used to be here) who have been TTC for YEARS. 3 months is not that long. Are you temping and charting? If not, you should start. fertility friend is a free online charting system. There is also a book, Taking Charge of Your Fertiltiy. 

adrimolina

MIssSally25 said:

I'm sorry for your loss. I lost my baby January 5th, and I still haven't gotten my AF. I'm not looking forward to it though.  Are you temping and charting? I don't have any experience with it personally, but I know it has helped a lot of ladies. Good luck! 

Hi, I am so sorry for your loss as well. It is so tough. Yes, I have been charting, it does help. Good luck to you as well! XO

adrimolina

YorkieLove83 said:

First, I'm sorry for you loss, I truly am. There is no community here to help you anymore.... if you are interested in a place that will provide a real sense of community and support look around and find the link to "the dark side".

There are some women here (used to be here) who have been TTC for YEARS. 3 months is not that long. Are you temping and charting? If not, you should start. fertility friend is a free online charting system. There is also a book, Taking Charge of Your Fertiltiy. 

Hi, thank you, I will look for the link. I was wondering where everyone went. I did not say I had been trying for 3 months, I said I had to wait for 3 months to try AGAIN after my MC...

I have been charting , I like using the ovia app and OPK's.

Thanks again for the feedback.

HeyMrsPotter

@adrimolina, I'm very sorry for your loss. I just sent you a private message.

adrimolina

Thanks!!

bansel92813

@adrimolina‌ I definitely know the feeling. I lost my baby Labor Day weekend and it's been tough. I described it to my DH as feeling all the emotions I felt after the M/C every month when AF comes. My EDD was 3/21/15. I just feel like that is going to be the hardest month ever!

adrimolina

bansel92813 said:

@adrimolina‌ I definitely know the feeling. I lost my baby Labor Day weekend and it's been tough. I described it to my DH as feeling all the emotions I felt after the M/C every month when AF comes. My EDD was 3/21/15. I just feel like that is going to be the hardest month ever!

I am so sorry for your loss. Sending you lots of hugs..yes, I agree when AF comes you feel that loss all over again. I hope we can get some good news sooner, even though we will never forget our lost babies..

Much love

adrimolina

dixandcox said:

@bansel92813 - If you don't know where everyone has gone, please PM me. There are a lot of people that can give you support when your EDD arrives elsewhere.

Join the dark side.

Will do, thanks!!

courtL13

I love the ovia app! I have been obsessed with it since I got it last summer! It helped us with preventing a pregnancy and when we were ready we conceived on the first try, but last week (Jan 28) I had a MC at 6 weeks. I also found out that I have PCOS (Polycystic ovary syndrome). I am excited and extremely nervous to start trying again. I'm not a very patient person but I know my body needs time to heal. There are so many emotions that come along with a MC and TTC after a loss. I have a really great support group and my DH is very supportive but at the same time I don't think he 100% understand the emotions the moms go through. I am so sorry for your loss but its very encouraging knowing there are others out there to talk to and that are going through the same things.  

adrimolina

courtL13 said:

I love the ovia app! I have been obsessed with it since I got it last summer! It helped us with preventing a pregnancy and when we were ready we conceived on the first try, but last week (Jan 28) I had a MC at 6 weeks. I also found out that I have PCOS (Polycystic ovary syndrome). I am excited and extremely nervous to start trying again. I'm not a very patient person but I know my body needs time to heal. There are so many emotions that come along with a MC and TTC after a loss. I have a really great support group and my DH is very supportive but at the same time I don't think he 100% understand the emotions the moms go through. I am so sorry for your loss but its very encouraging knowing there are others out there to talk to and that are going through the same things.  

Yes, I love the app as well! I am so sorry for your loss, it is so incredibly painful. Sending you hugs! Yes, I feel the same way about DH they try to understand but I don't think they fully do. Good luck to you!

lifeislove87

Sorry about your loss. For me, when I experienced AF the first few times after my loss I felt like I was reliving the misscarriage (even though I rationally know that this wasn't true). For me I felt that needing to be pregnant again was part of my grieving process and that if I was pregnant again I wouldn't need to feel sad or angry or hurt. I've since learned that grief sucks and so does TTC after a loss. Talking to people who understand and don't judge is HUGE whether it's on the dark side or IRL.

adrimolina

@lifeislove87 Sorry for your loss. Completely agree with you! XO

scoutmaxwell

Yes, I know how you feel. I had my MC in October as well. It really is an emotional roller coaster.  

4N6s

I'm sorry for your loss. AF feels like PTSD for me since my miscarriage was so traumatizing.

adrimolina

I am so sorry for your loss @4N6s@scoutmaxwell . I really don't think anyone can understand how awful it is unless they go through it. I'm sure the people around me that know think, 'oh but thankfully it was early'.. But like my OB says, the moment you see that BFP you already picture that baby in your arms..

Hopefully as time goes by it gets a bit easier, much love to you and good luck!!

lifeislove87

4N6s said:

I'm sorry for your loss. AF feels like PTSD for me since my miscarriage was so traumatizing.

I very much agree with this statement, my poor DH says that he feels so helpless around that time of the month. I have started working wih my DH to come up with strategies for if I/ when I get AF. For me the most helpful thing is doing something special that week that we preplan (going out for dinner, going on a trip out of town) they don't always have to be expensive and elaborate (sometimes I just want to go out for tea with DH). AF still is traumatic but in it's own way it helps a little. Sorry for your loss and traumatic experience, this whole thing just stinks.

elmindreda

I completely agree! My periods have gotten so much worse after my loss and just take me back to labor every time. 

adrimolina

I cannot believe AF came 6 days early! I am so sad, angry and frustrated, my heart aches. I had all sorts of what I thought were pregnancy symptoms and then they went away and started feeling lower back pain and spotted brown for 3 days and got AF. They did a blood test and ultrasound to see if maybe it was a chemical pregnancy, BT didn't show anything and waiting on US results. Sorry to be so graphic but I've been worried because they don't seem like normal periods, when I pee I see tons of little particles like when I had my mc.

SO confusing. I have a Dr. Appt next week and I hope he tells me I can keep trying. I am getting desperate. I use OPK's, do you think this is enough or should I temp as well? Thanks!