Scared & seeking support

AMShark

Hey, PAIF ladies - my internet support system, my rock(s) (maybe scratch that last one - sounds too much like testicals).

I woke up about an hour ago, just unable to get comfortable. In retrospect, maybe a little crampy too - but I thought if I got up to pee I'd feel better.
That's when I discovered that I'm bleeding. I've bled once before since being admitted, but this seems to be a good deal more blood.

I got an exam from one of the residents (speculum & digital exam - haven't had a digital exam since my water broke due to the risk of infection & I have to say, it made me a little uneasy). She reported that everything looked good - so, I'm guessing no dilation & my cervix is still holding strong.

I'm on the toco monitors now - the heartbeats seem good for both babies, but the contraction monitor is picking up some irregular contractions.

Im on IV fluids now (because a lack of fluid might be the cause of the contractions - FX the IV stops them). They also put me on magnesium - ( cue dramatic music to reflect the terror *that* brought on & the chain of thoughts that it started). My MFM ordered the magnesium when they called him. From what I've heard, it's gonna suck - I'm already starting to feel very warm.

So, I'm really scared right now. Can you send your magic internet healing powers to make me feel better?

To top the whole thing off, it looks like it's been snowing all night, and DH is coming down with a cold or something - so I don't think I want him out here. I haven't even called him yet - I think I'll wait until I have some good news - or until it stops snowing --- or at least until 6:00 am.

* eta - because why should I start typing well now*

AMShark

Bonus - l&d and maternity are full at this hospital. Yesterday, my roommate & I heard the sound of babies crying a lot - which can be sweet.
Now all I hear is the sound of a woman screaming somewhere on the floor. Perfect.

poohniki

Huge hugs! You're doing such a great job. I am hoping the mag doesn't suck too much. And the snow turns to rain soon. And that lady in your floor gets an epidural.
Keeping you and the babies in my t&ps

AMShark

Update - it looks like the contractions have stopped. Maybe the IV fluid did the trick.
The babies seem to be moving a lot. Maybe they're still awake from the earlier contractions - maybe they don't like the magnesium.
I can't tell if the discomfort in my abdomen is from laying on my back with all of these monitors strapped to me, from all of the kicking going on inside of me, or from something worse ( though, I think it's a good sign that the contraction monitor has stopped showing contractions).

On the upside, I haven't heard screaming in a while, but I have heard a baby crying again. I'm hoping that screaming lady turned into proud, nursing mommy, and she's done being tortured for the day.

AMShark

Thank you @poohniki‌ - I can't sit up right now to take a proper look at the window , but I think the snow may be changing to rain already.
Things are looking up.

pblge

(((Hugs))) No words of wisdom here. You're in the right place, doing everything you can, and the babIes are getting the best care possible. I'm sorry this is such a scary journey for you. Sending lots of good thoughts that your DH wakes up feeling better, that there's no more screaming, and that the snow is gone come morning.

lib1974

I am so sorry you are going through this. The hospital sucks for many reasons but if you are getting good care that's all that matters. How far along are and and you have twins right? I am not carrying twins but it sounds like we have similar issues right now. Have they done an u/s yet? Did you high risk OB come in? Sorry so many questions for you I am just concerned and want ALL the info

jessimi06

((BIG HUGS))! I'm glad the contractions have stopped and hopefully they were just due to being a little dehydrated. I hope DH feels better when he wakes up and that the roads are clear so that he can come visit you; I know having him there would make you feel better. You've come so far and you're doing such a great job!

weansworld09

I'm so happy to see your update is a positive one so far! Keeping you and the little ones in my thoughts and prayers. Have you called your DH yet? You are one strong lady!

daydreamernyc

So glad to hear that the contractions have stopped. Has the bleeding stopped as well? Or do you not know until you get up again? And that must be the worst, hearing a screaming woman! Glad it's quieting down. My thoughts are with you.

daydreamernyc

Ps, I think you are in the tri state area, right? Here in NY the snow looks pretty but it's all heavy, wet and slushy. It's starting to be a real mess so not the kind you want to be out in. (Your not missing much)

lawmom747

Sending thoughts and prayers. Glad the contractions have stopped and the screaming down the hall.

iheartsippycups2

Praying for you & those sweet babies! Internet hugs too...

ky29

Glad the contractions have stopped. You're doing great! Hang in there. ((Hugs))

katers79

So relieved to see the contractions have stopped! So scary. Has the bleeding as well? How are the babies' fluid levels?

T&P that your weekend gets super boring, and things settle down! And DH can safely make it into visit. Keep us posted!!

Giants721

Glad the contractions have stopped! You are such a strong woman. Hugs!

rella22

Glad the contractions, screaming, and snow have stopped! How about the bleeding? Did that stop too!? It's a GREAT thing you are where you are!! If anything at all happens or needs to be done you'll have NO downtime! And it doesn't matter that l&d is full today because those babies are still cooking for a few more weeks!!!! Hang in there!

turquoisequeen

Huge hugs! You are a rockstar. So glad the contractions have stopped. Seems like they are on top of things there which is reassuring.

AMShark

I think @poohniki‌ has magic powers bc everything good she typed came to pass - the magnesium didn't suck too badly, the snow looks like it's turned to rain and the screamer got her epidural (at least that's what I gathered from the tech who drew my blood this morning).

After all of the drama this morning, I fell asleep for almost 2 hours.
I'm still bleeding, but I'm feeling a lot better.

I talked to DH & he was concerned but I could hear that he's still sick, so I told him to stay home.

@lib1974‌ - I'm 26w3d with twins, but i had PPROM at 20w1d. I checked in to the hospital at 23w2d, and I get an u/s every Sunday & Thursday. I've had an MFM from the beginning, since twins are always high risk. My MFM or his NP come by daily to check on me. He's the one that ordered the magnesium.

DSculley1824

Glad to see things are "calming" down a little bit with your updates. You are such a rock star for what you are going through. Keep staying strong and we are all here for support whenever you need it! FX the rest of the day (and weeks) go smoothly!

PurpleDaisy923

I'm sending good thoughts to you and your babies! ((Hugs))

bears1011

Thinking of you and the babies! Hope the bleeding stops and things calm down...stay strong!!

sweetpotato123

@AMShark- sending you so many good vibes. I don't know how you've been able to stay so upbeat, and honestly sane, throughout the last 6 weeks. You are an amazingly strong woman and I admire you. Keeping all of you in my prayers and thoughts. So happy the issues today have not turned into something more serious.

Canuck13

I'm so sorry you have to keep going through these scary incidents, but am relieved to hear your positive updates since. I'm sending lots and lots of baby-cookin' good vibes your way and hope you have a stress-free, contraction-less rest of your weekend!!

kmc84

Sending you love and hugs!!

That's a rough start to the day for sure! I'm glad things have calmed down, and hopefully the bleeding stops soon.

FishyMom

You are doing a wonderful job. Hang in there momma. I hope the bleeding stops soon. I'm glad everything is looking on still. Big hugs lady!

Lady2010

Sending you lots of good thoughts and T&Ps!!! Glad to hear the magnesium seems to have helped and that the HBs are good and moving lots.

FX that the bleeding stops soon!

Glad you were able to sleep some. Hopefully you'll get some more rest. And I am sending weird / creepy Internet get well vibes to your husband so he can come join you.

Will be thinking of you!!!

Aimothy

Thinking of you! I hope the bleeding stops soon and you can go back to your boring old bed rest days.

Ecarabeo217

Oh no! Sorry to hear about your dramatic morning, but I'm glad things have seemed to settle a bit. You're doing so great and you've already gotten so far! Nobody wants to deliver now, but you've passed a few hurdles already! Those LOs will stay and cook for a bit longer if all these Internet vibes have any say in the matter! Chin up...you're in the right place and doing all that you can. Glad the mag isn't horrendous for you!!

alpCRNA

I'm a little late to this post, but I'm glad things are looking better.  Hopefully, the bleeding will stop soon.

tweetyknicks

Glad things are looking up. You're doing a great job in a tough situation.

MKateG

I'm so glad you and the babies are still doing well (other than being in hospital with a few hiccups). I don't have much time to participate in the boards anymore but I try to come on and lurk to check on everyone. Sending T&Ps your way to you and babies! And it could very well be the toco making you hurt, when I was hooked up to them overnight my back/body constantly hurt due to not being able to move. (I did talk the nurse into letting me have an extra long "bathroom"break from the monitors!) But hang in there your doing great :-) cook babies cook!

1220winterbride

Praying for you and your babies. I hope we see more happy news soon! Fx your DH can join you soon.

AMShark

Thank you everyone for the support.  To see support from so many, including those who are no longer regular posters here, makes me feel much better.

I believe in the power of good internet vibes - I think they've gotten me this far. 

The bleeding hasn't exactly stopped.  I'm leaking a larger volume of fluid than I had been, and my maternity pads are now fully saturated and pink when I go to the bathroom.  Pink is better than red though, and hopefully, the pink will continue to fade back to clear.  I'm starting to wonder if I should be asking for something more absorbent than maternity pads - I'm sure they make something for bladder incontinence that holds more volume.  .... but then, part of me wants to be aware of how much fluid is leaking, and I'm hesitant to change to something different just now.

Oh, I found out that I only got a small dose of magnesium.  Apparently, the people who have the really miserable experience go on a 24 hour magnesium drip - I just got a small 1 bag dose.  I may not actually be immune to the yuckiness of that med, but maybe I'll never need to confirm that either.

Tomorrow is Sunday, so I'll have an u/s. I'm hoping to find out then if there is any notable change in the amount of fluid around my boy.  There hasn't been much fluid for the past 3 weeks, and I haven't been given any number or measure on the fluid since I've gotten to the hospital - so, I don't know how much room for change there is.

Ending on a positive note: A co-worker stopped by to visit last night & drop off my fixed laptop (huzzah!)  And she brought some of the delicious cafeteria blondies with her - so I totally ate them both today, and medicated myself with some comfort food dessert.  

starlightgator

@AMShark‌ Where to begin?! I just read your post from early morning and got very worried. But, as I read your updates my heartrate slowed down a bit. Still, so frustrating and scary it must be for you. I'm praying that things will settle down soon and when you see those sweet twins on the monitor tomorrow, you'll have only tears of happiness. You are such a strong woman and I admire you. Anytime I want to whine, I remember that you have been going through so much more and have maintained your sanity and strength. Please keep your chin up because we are all rooting for you and the babies and sending you creepy internet hugs. Can't wait to read a happy update from you tomorrow. FX.

pblge

Sending t&p that tomorrow's u/s gives reassuring results.

lib1974

Hang in there!

gsancho

So happy to see things have gotten better.  You are doing great!  FX that the u/s bring reassuring news.

Justone13

Hey lady just checking the tread. Sending thoughts and prayers to you. I hope things are going to quiet down a bit for you and you get a good scan tomorrow!

BabyKsMommy

Well I'm really glad that everything is looking better for you. I too was super afraid of the magnesium after I read stuff on here about it.
For me it wasn't THAT bad. I didn't feel great so I mostly slept while on it. They also weren't letting me eat that day and it took away my appetite so that was fortunate.

They had me on it because I was bleeding also, like a lot of blood. They thought it was from a placental abruption which they saw on an u/s. I did eventually stop bleeding. But it was gradual, it faded to pink as yours has so I'm hopeful that yours will too.

I'm glad the babies are still doing well. I'm hoping they stay in a lot longer. You are doing so well! Keep it up momma!

chicory

Late to the party (hmm, party might be the wrong word) as usual, but in any case you and your sweet babies have been in my prayers all along. I think you're a freakin' rock star for taking this all in stride (as much as one can) and just getting that job of cooking those babies done! I'm so glad to hear things have settled down today and will pray tomorrow's ultrasound shows good things. Look how far you, YH, and the babies have come so far already! You've got this!