Socializing stress

ekneipp

Last night I let my DH know how lonely this mom gig can leave me feeling, I use to be a very social person (I will be working part time from home in a couple weeks). We researched Mom groups, baby social hours, story time at the library, there's quite a bit in our area. But now I am stressing about the timing between naps and feeding since his wake times are only about 1.5-2 hours. Just wondering if others are going to group social times and how they adjust their schedules. I really need to get out more than to the grocery store...

lpeters84

I would say your sanity is worth deviating from schedules for one day if necessary. My LO and I go to a mom's group once a week. I try to schedule her nap so that she has just woken from a nap and eaten right before we go. Sometimes that doesn't work out and she ends up taking a cat nap while we are at the group (I bring the carseat/stroller). I desperately needed contact with other adults as well, so attending the group is well worth the (maybe) one day of crappy napping IMO.

shevaCC

I read a lot while on leave with DD and one thing that stuck with me is that in Brazil (and many other places, but Brazil was the example in the book) it's totally common for parents to bring their kids along to parties that last into the wee hours. Not nightly, but for special occasions. I took that to mean some things are more important than routines/naps at home.

In your case, it sounds like getting out of the house is more important than LOs schedule right now. If you breastfeed, all you need is your diaper bag. Otherwise pack a bottle and just go. Don't worry about it fitting into a specific window in your schedule. If LO is tired enough, he'll nap. Or worst case you can bail. Just go for it!

shevaCC

Btw - I use this same logic for holidays/family visiting. If someone is getting in a bit after bedtime we'll sometimes keep the kids up to say hello. But not every night of the visit for no reason. It's always a balance between structure and living life.

caybeh

Meh, I just go. DD will usually just fall asleep in the car seat or I can get her to fall asleep on me.

rstarrlemaitre

The added energy/newness of going keeps DS awake even if it's roughly his nap time, and then usually his next nap will just be longer to compensate - go and enjoy!

tracey007

Ds is our second so his schedule revolves around big sis greatly. He's doing just fine. I wish he had a more predictable schedule, but even if we stayed home all the time that wouldn't be the case.

ekneipp

Thanks all for the encouragement! I went to an informal group this morning and was the only one there, hah! But we'll try some more till we find at least one good one

herecomesthesun

shevaCC said:

Btw - I use this same logic for holidays/family visiting. If someone is getting in a bit after bedtime we'll sometimes keep the kids up to say hello. But not every night of the visit for no reason. It's always a balance between structure and living life.

This is what we do. I don't want LO to be so structured that we miss out on something fun that comes up (visitors, holidays, outings). However, this is how I was raised. My mom and dad took me everywhere and the younger siblings learned to nap on the go because there were always older sibling activities. 

LO gets about 14-16 hours of sleep each day.